@Jazzhead
I will agree with you on the day when women can become pregnant by themselves. Until that day comes,the man involved in the pregnancy should have any equal say.
And I don't want to hear any crap about the "it's the woman's body and the woman gets to decide". That's bullbush. She is not aborting her body. She is aborting the fetus she and the man created.
A key source of the vituperation on this thread is an inability or unwillingness to distinguish between legal standards and moral standards. Of course the partners to an unplanned pregnancy should try to work things out. That's both common sense and common decency. If the goal is to prevent an abortion, the man needs to step up and offer both his emotional and financial support. Unfortunately, too often the man having his "say" means the application of pressure on the woman to take care of "her" problem, and support consists of paying the bus fare to Planned Parenthood.
But as a legal matter, it is unworkable for the man to have an "equal say". The man doesn't bear the physical burden of pregnancy, and it's the woman who must, as a matter of biology, assume responsibility for the fetus's well-being. The choice right must be exercisable by the woman alone. 9 times out of 10, I'd say, men have absolutely no problem with that. Remember the Graham Parker song, You Can't Be Too Strong, where the man reacts to the woman's abortion by rejoicing?
But I don't discount for a moment the enormous and pivotal role played by the man. 9 times out of 10, I'd say, it's the man who effectively decides, by either extending or withholding support from his partner.
Edit: Here are the lyrics to You Can't Be Too Strong, which made National Review's list of the 50 greatest conservative rock songs:
Did they tear it out, with talons of steel
And give you a shot, so that you wouldn't feel
And wash it away, as if it wasn't real
It's just a mistake, I won't have to face
Don't give it a name, don't give it a place
Don't give it a chance, it's lucky in a way
It must have felt strange, to find me inside you
I hadn't intended to stay
If you want to keep it right, put it to sleep at night
Squeeze it until it could say
You can't be too strong you can't be too strong
You can't be too strong
You can't be too strong you decide what's wrong
Well I ain't gonna cry, I'm gonna rejoice
And shout myself dry, and go see the boys
They'll laugh when I say, I left it overseas
Yeah babe I know that it gets dark, down by luna park
But everybody else, is squeezing out his spark
That happened in the heat, somewhere in the dark, in the dark
The doctor gets nervous, completing the service
He's all rubber gloves and no head
He fumbles the light switch, it's just another minor hitch
Wishes to God he was dead
But you can't be too strong you can't be too strong
You can't be too strong
You can't be too strong
Can't be too strong you decide what's wrong
Can't be too hard, too tough, too rough, too right, too wrong
And you, can't be too strong
Baby you can't be too strong
Yeah, abortion diminishes everyone involved. As Parker sings, it takes uncommon strength to do the right thing. And it frosts me to hear so-called "conservatives" claiming abortions are for the "convenience" of woman too eager to "spread their legs".
