Ridiculous News of the Day

[roamer_1]

@roamer_1    That is the Gods honest truth.  I have honestly fallen on the floor laughing several times reading that book.  The man was a marvel!  I miss him and his writings.  RIP Pat McManus.

FACTS 

[verga]

Nah. I will be buying the full rack. As it turns out, I was not aware of his continuation... The first boxed set is what I knew... And there's another other boxed set after that, and then some! So I have a happy 'catching up' to look forward to - And it's all your fault. 

And yeah, reminisce is right... He's over in Idaho, which is spitting distance around here... So if you rub off the humor, that's my life he's talking about. I lived it too.

like the soapbox airplane and the barn roof... Not quite the same, but we built a long ramp out of snow so we could sled from the top of the barn roof, across the barnyard, down the hill and across the pond...

I experienced that same exhilaration he described, sitting there on the barn peak with my Flexible Flyer... I too came oh-so-close to mishap, though unlike him, I DID complete my run successfully, just the one time, to include not falling off the side of the ramp (ice by that time), and shooting the gap, remembering to duck under the propped up barbed wire, so it only tore the back of my winter coat to shreds, and wholly deprived me of the ass of my pants and underpants, as I shot through at 247 miles an hour... leaving grooves in my butt that the old man could use for measurement as he applied my soon-to-come whoopin.

It seems the roof of the barn was made of tin type... A very thin aluminum cast-off from news-printing back in the day. And it seems a robust young lad, on a Flexible Flyer with sharpened runners, is not considered a warrantable use of a tin type roof, and it turns out, is a mass quite beyond the  shear strength of four roofing nails and easily transgresses the mil thickness of the thin aluminum... rending it and rendering it useless as a roofing product - that is, where it did not just tear away altogether. 

That is how the barn got a brandy-spankin new corrugated tin roof at top-dollar prices, and I got a brand new parka and pants to cover my freshly paddled butt.

Ah, those were the days, right? 

[Bigun]

Until now, I'd never heard of "Rancid Crabtree."  Not sure if that's good or not.

@Gefn  How was your Yom Kippur?  Did you get things set straight for the next year?

I read the short stories in Field and Stream and Outdoor Life magazines for years but don't think I've ever seen a McManus book.

[Wingnut]

I read the short stories in Field and Stream and Outdoor Life magazines for years but don't think I've ever seen a McManus book.

[mountaineer]

 Colorado Golfer Gored By Elk On Course ... Kidney Shredded
10/6/2020 12:03 PM PT

A Colorado golfer nearly died on the 17th hole of a course Saturday ... after an elk rammed the man's cart and gored him straight through his back with its horn.

The story is insane ... Megan Bornhoft says her husband, Zak, was finishing up a round at Evergreen G.C. in Evergreen, Colo. with his buds -- when disaster struck at around 6:30 p.m.

Megan says an elk charged Zak's golf cart ... and speared the man in "the right side of his lower back" with its horn.

Megan says Zak was rushed to the hospital ... and after doctors checked him out -- they found some horrific injuries.

"His kidney was cut into two pieces," Megan said.   ...

TMZ
The wildlife at our course is mostly Canada geese and turtles, thank goodness.

[verga]

Colorado Golfer Gored By Elk On Course ... Kidney Shredded
10/6/2020 12:03 PM PT TMZ
The wildlife at our course is mostly Canada geese and turtles, thank goodness.

Friend of mine in Park City Utah, has moose.

[Wingnut]

Colorado Golfer Gored By Elk On Course ... Kidney Shredded
10/6/2020 12:03 PM PT TMZ
The wildlife at our course is mostly Canada geese and turtles, thank goodness.

Damn I thought Chubbs Peterson had it bad.....

[mountaineer]

Who knew the folks in India were so fanatical about oral hygiene?

Toothbrush removed from man’s stomach after he swallowed it while brushing
 Jen Mills
Tuesday 22 Sep 2020 5:35 pm
Full story at Metro News

A bloodied toothbrush had to be removed from a man’s stomach after he swallowed it while cleaning the back of his throat.

Doctors removed the 19cm-long brush within 24 hours, fearing that leaving it any longer could have been fatal.

The patient, 39, whose name has been withheld, was brushing his teeth on September 15 when it slipped. He rushed to a nearby health clinic, which quickly referred him to a hospital more than 100km away. ...

An X-ray and further tests couldn’t locate the brush in the man’s throat – leading doctors to conclude it was in his stomach. A minor operation was performed a short time later and the brush was removed.  ...

[Free Vulcan]

I can see that. I nearly swallowed a lit cigar one time.

[mountaineer]

I can see that. I nearly swallowed a lit cigar one time.

I hope you flossed.

[mountaineer]

A Skull Sat on Fireplace Mantel with Sunglasses on It — and Now Police Say It Was Missing Man
October 27, 2020

KNOXVILLE, Tenn. — The Morgan County Sheriff’s Office has been informed that a positive identification (through DNA testing performed by Knox County Regional Forensics Center and the UT Department of Anthropology) has been made of a human skull that was found allegedly in March of 2019 by an individual in the Gobey area of Morgan County.

Someone subsequently placed the skull on a fireplace mantle where a pair of sunglasses were added. The skull remained there until the Sheriff’s Office was informed of its existence.

 The MCSO retrieved the skull and sent it for testing using DNA from family members of Junior Willie McCann who had been missing since September 2012. The DNA from the family members and the skull were a match. ...


Full story at Breaking 911

[mountaineer]

Man’s wife sells his PlayStation 5 after she discovers he lied and said it was an air purifier
by: Char'Nese Turner and Nexstar Media Wire
Posted: Dec 3, 2020 / 06:22 AM EST   / Updated: Dec 3, 2020 / 06:22 AM EST   

(NewsNation Now) — A Taiwanese man was lucky enough to score the newest Playstation 5, but his time with the device was short-lived because his wife sold the console when she found out it wasn’t an air purifier like he’d told her.

The buyer, Jin Wu, shared the experience on Facebook. Wu said he arranged to meet up with the seller in person and even called to verify the purchase, but was met by a female voice, who he said didn’t sound like she was much of a gamer. ...

After a short exchange about where the device was purchased, the husband admitted that he tricked his wife into thinking the game console was an air purifier.

“It’s my wife who wants to sell it,” the Facebook post read. “I went silent after seeing the look in his eyes. I could feel his pain.” ...

Full story at FOX8

[mountaineer]

WATCH: High School Football Player Gets Ejected, Delivers Vicious Hit on Referee
by Clint Lamb about 12 hours ago
Outkick

Football is an emotional game, but there is a such thing as too much emotion.

A perfect example of that occurred during a high school in the state of Texas. Edinburg was taking on Pharr-San Juan-Alamo (or PSJA) High School when Edinburg’s best defensive player, Emmanuel Duron, was ejected for a late hit and unsportsmanlike conduct penalty.

Not a big deal, right? Well, unsportsmanlike behavior wasn’t done, apparently.

Duron came off the sidelines and shockingly went after the referee who had just ejected him. One user on Twitter with the name Santiago (@_7santiago) posted a clip of the violent hit. ...

The thread from Andrew McCulloch, a journalist from The Monitor News, included a lot more detail into the exchange, but the referee was apparently down for an extended period of time.

After originally bringing out a cart, the ref was eventually able to get off the field under his own power, but he was being evaluated for a concussion. Duron, on the other hand, was escorted out of the stadium by police. ...

Videos, etc., at Outkick

[Gefn]

Man’s wife sells his PlayStation 5 after she discovers he lied and said it was an air purifier
by: Char'Nese Turner and Nexstar Media Wire
Posted: Dec 3, 2020 / 06:22 AM EST   / Updated: Dec 3, 2020 / 06:22 AM EST    Full story at FOX8

So are they still together?

[Wingnut]

"We don’t currently know much about Duron — well, except for the fact that he was his team’s top defensive player. But any chance he had of playing at the next level might have just ended with that completely unnecessary hit."

Might be correct since he did this before.  Had he not...being a member of a protected class...he might have go a pass.  Play at a JUCO for a few years then transfer his riod raged ass to the SEC.

Duron was suspended for the remainder of the 2019-20 soccer season after a similar incident occurred during a match on the pitch last year against crosstown rival Edinburg Vela.

FYI the school forfeited the game.

[mountaineer]

"We don’t currently know much about Duron — well, except for the fact that he was his team’s top defensive player. But any chance he had of playing at the next level might have just ended with that completely unnecessary hit."

This kid is a potential resident of death row.

[catfish1957]

"We don’t currently know much about Duron — well, except for the fact that he was his team’s top defensive player. But any chance he had of playing at the next level might have just ended with that completely unnecessary hit."

Might be correct since he did this before.  Had he not...being a member of a protected class...he might have go a pass.  Play at a JUCO for a few years then transfer his riod raged ass to the SEC.



FYI the school forfeited the game.

Saw where the thug kicked a 51 yd FG this year.  That's pretty amazing for a HS kid.  Sucker thumping a referee on a call?  I pretty much think any college now would pass on that level of risk. Article I read about him didn't say anything about the Soccer incident.  Roid rage maybe?

[Cyber Liberty]

Saw where the thug kicked a 51 yd FG this year.  That's pretty amazing for a HS kid.  Sucker thumping a referee on a call?  I pretty much think any college now would pass on that level of risk. Article I read about him didn't say anything about the Soccer incident.  Roid rage maybe?

Black Privilege seems more likely.  He got special favors his whole life because of oppression, and likely has an attitude that it's proper to body-slam a ref.  He'll do the same thing to a cop, too.  Then he'll get shot, and we'll have another batch of riots starting in the shithole city in which he lives. 

[sneakypete]

This kid is a potential resident of death row.

@mountaineer

Providing someone doesn't pull his plug before he rises to that level.

[Cyber Liberty]

@mountaineer

Providing someone doesn't pull his plug before he rises to that level.

@sneakypete

His is the Thug Life, and that road leads to many destinations.  Life is cheap.

[PeteS in CA]

https://notthebee.com/article/new-covid-rules-for-ohio-high-school-wrestling-says-students-can-wrestle-but-they-cant-shake-hands

New Covid rules for Ohio high school wrestling say students can wrestle but they can't shake hands.

It's 'rastling season and to try and limit the spread of Covid officials with the Ohio High School Athletic Association (OHSAA) have done the responsible thing and released some updated requirements for players and coaches.

The students are still being allowed to wrestle. In fact, they don't even have to wear face masks while they do so. But they will no longer be allowed to shake hands before and after the match.

[Smokin Joe]

Saw where the thug kicked a 51 yd FG this year.  That's pretty amazing for a HS kid.  Sucker thumping a referee on a call?  I pretty much think any college now would pass on that level of risk. Article I read about him didn't say anything about the Soccer incident.  Roid rage maybe?

You just aren't supposed to do that from the bench. Just have to wait for an opportunity during play...    (which may or may not present)

[Cyber Liberty]

You just aren't supposed to do that from the bench. Just have to wait for an opportunity during play...    (which may or may not present)

He couldn't, he was ejected from the game for Unsportsmanlike Behavior.  He just felt like it was the thing to do, for whatever reason.

[verga]

WATCH: High School Football Player Gets Ejected, Delivers Vicious Hit on Referee
by Clint Lamb about 12 hours ago
OutkickVideos, etc., at Outkick

I hope to God that his parents let him spend at least one night in the Gray bar motel.

[Cyber Liberty]

I hope to God that his parents let him spend at least one night in the Gray bar motel.

It's more than likely they won't, and probably never have shown him any discipline.

[verga]

It's more than likely they won't, and probably never have shown him any discipline.

Saw an article after I commented that his $10,000 was posted that night. Years ago my cousin got into trouble. His Mother could not afford his bail and asked my parents to help out. My Dad said he would.... in the morning. My aunt was beside herself. My father her that she was free to have someone else do it. We bailed him out in the morning. I honestly don't know how much good it did, but it sure didn't  hurt.

[Smokin Joe]

He couldn't, he was ejected from the game for Unsportsmanlike Behavior.  He just felt like it was the thing to do, for whatever reason.

Yeah. That's why vengeance is a dish best served cold. I bagged one in college in an inter-mural game, took him off his feet and slid him a good 10 yards on the astroturf. Jerk had been ignoring violations by the other team (his dorm team).
I just said I was watching the play and coming in for the sack (another of our guys got the QB when I nailed him). "Sorry 'bout that...Here, let me help you up...."

[mountaineer]

Police: Allegheny County Jail Inmate, Woman Charged With Child Sex Abuse After ‘Disturbing’ Virtual Visit
Jail officials were screening inmates' video visitation sessions on tablets when they noticed the "disturbing behaviors."
December 17, 2020 at 12:47 pm
By: KDKA-TV News Staff

PITTSBURGH (KDKA) – An Allegheny County Jail inmate and woman are facing child sex abuse charges after a virtual visit.

County police say jail officials alerted them of “disturbing behaviors” while screening inmates’ video visitation sessions on tablets.

Police say while talking to 27-year-old inmate Justin Henderson, 23-year-old Natika Maddox was partially nude and performing sex acts on camera while her 22-month-old child was present.  ...

Rest of story at KDKA


The happy couple. Nice neck art.

[Smokin Joe]

Police: Allegheny County Jail Inmate, Woman Charged With Child Sex Abuse After ‘Disturbing’ Virtual Visit
Jail officials were screening inmates' video visitation sessions on tablets when they noticed the "disturbing behaviors."
December 17, 2020 at 12:47 pm
By: KDKA-TV News StaffRest of story at KDKA


The happy couple. Nice neck art.

Yabbut....If she'd left the kid in the next room, that would have been child neglect....

[verga]

(CNN)This week, the world was introduced to Tessica Brown, a young woman from Louisiana who made possibly the most unfortunate haircare mixup in history. Instead of using regular hairspray on her hair, she grabbed a can of Gorilla Glue spray adhesive and went to town.

The result was, well, exactly what you think would happen if you coated your head in industrial-strength glue.
Her hair became an impenetrable helmet, and as her social media videos about the incident racked up millions of views, people became obsessed with her predicament.
Do you roll your eyes at someone who's gotten themselves into such a situation? Do you feel bad?
Cynicism or empathy: It's a choice we often face as we observe an endless parade of online strangers whipping out their mistakes, poor decisions and unfortunate mishaps for all the world to see.
https://www.cnn.com/2021/02/11/us/gorilla-glue-challenge-hair-tessica-brown-trnd/index.html

[mountaineer]

Cynicism or empathy: It's a choice we often face as we observe an endless parade of online strangers whipping out their mistakes, poor decisions and unfortunate mishaps for all the world to see.

There's something very pathetic about people who share everything about their lives, even the most intimate and personal and nauseating stuff, on social media. Why are people so starved for attention? Why do college-age kids take dozens of photos of themselves every day and post them online, apparently hoping for "Oh, you're so beautiful" comments? 

[mountaineer]

Bear Attacks Alaska Woman in Outhouse Toilet
by Bobby Burack
updated about an hour ago   

More bad news in America. While a woman was using an outhouse in the Alaska wilderness, a bear hiding in the toilet attacked her from behind and bit her butt.

“I got out there and sat down on the toilet, and immediately something bit my butt right as I sat down,” Shannon Stevens told AP.

“I jumped up, and I screamed when it happened.”

Awful, just awful.

Stevens’ brother heard her scream, ran to the outhouse, and lifted the toilet to see what had bitten her. It was a bear. ...  Outkick

[Polly Ticks]

Bear Attacks Alaska Woman in Outhouse Toilet
by Bobby Burack
updated about an hour ago   

More bad news in America. While a woman was using an outhouse in the Alaska wilderness, a bear hiding in the toilet attacked her from behind and bit her butt.

“I got out there and sat down on the toilet, and immediately something bit my butt right as I sat down,” Shannon Stevens told AP.

“I jumped up, and I screamed when it happened.”

Awful, just awful.

Stevens’ brother heard her scream, ran to the outhouse, and lifted the toilet to see what had bitten her. It was a bear. ...  Outkick

I'm not sure the bear should be held liable. He was obviously there first.  Unless it's a two-seater, proper etiquette would be to wait your turn.

[Smokin Joe]

My reaction would lead to the bear being described much in the same way as if it had been kneewalking drunk...

[Wingnut]

Typical of the last year and a half in this world.  Everything is turned toppsy turvey.  Now we learn that Bears don't shit in the woods.

[sneakypete]

Typical of the last year and a half in this world.  Everything is turned toppsy turvey.  Now we learn that Bears don't shit in the woods.

@Wingnut

See what happens when people elect Dims? Or more correctly,people allow Dims to get away with electing themselves?

As Forest Gump,or maybe Boy Jorge Bush, used to say,"Whut wuz up is now doawn,n what wuz doawn iz now up! BTW,whurs mah mama? Ah think mah diapur needs changin."

[roamer_1]

Typical of the last year and a half in this world.  Everything is turned toppsy turvey.  Now we learn that Bears don't shit in the woods.

Well, technically that's not what we've learned... A bear may still sh*t in the woods...

What is true is this:

A bear sh*ts wherever the hell it wants to. 

[mountaineer]

New York dad-to-be killed by exploding gender reveal device
By Tamar Lapin
February 22, 2021 | 5:15pm

A dad-to-be in upstate New York was killed when a device he was building for a gender reveal party exploded, state police said Monday.

Christopher Pekny, 28, was working on the device for his child’s gender reveal party in the Catskills town of Liberty when it blew up just before noon on Sunday, cops said.

The blast killed Pekny and injured his brother, 27-year-old Michael Pekny, who was treated for his injuries at the Garnet Medical Center in Middletown, according to police. ... Rest of story (which doesn't mention whether the baby is a boy or girl).

[sneakypete]

What happened to just telling people,or putting up a balloon with "It's a boy!" or "it's a girl!" in your yard?

People need cannons now?

[Cyber Liberty]

What happened to just telling people,or putting up a balloon with "It's a boy!" or "it's a girl!" in your yard?

People need cannons now?

At least he didn't start a forest fire this time.

[240B]

Cannons explode all the time, and they always have all throughout history.
In this case, he had a 'ceremonial' cannon which was meant to make a big noise.
That is to say, it was not designed to fire a projectile.
It exploded because he stuffed it with confetti (or whatever) and caused a backfire.
Or, he got excited and wanted to impress the crowd so he went crazy with the gunpowder, or both.
Bottom line is, backyard cannons are great 99% of the time, like lawn darts or smoking at the gas station.
But that 1% of the time, is deadly.

[Smokin Joe]

What happened to just telling people,or putting up a balloon with "It's a boy!" or "it's a girl!" in your yard?

People need cannons now?

Handing out cigars with the appropriate label or ribbon them was healthier...
Smoking them was optional.

[mountaineer]

Bubble gum cigars, in shades of pink or blue, also are available.

[mountaineer]

To be fair, if I had to live in Oregon, I'd probably drink a lot, too.

REPORT: Oregon Man Arrested For Allegedly Driving While Drunk Had A BAC Of .77
David Hookstead
February 23, 2021 5:23 AM ET


Oregon man Nathan Danzuka reportedly had the highest BAC ever recorded during a recent arrest.

According to results obtained by TMZ, Danzuka was arrested by Warm Springs police earlier in February for allegedly driving while drunk, and his BAC was allegedly .778 at the time of his arrest, which is nine times the legal limit.

TMZ reported that it’s the highest blood alcohol concentration on record. As of this time, charges are still pending. ...

Daily Caller

[Gefn]

What ever happened to parents who wait until baby pops out to learn if it’s a boy or girl?

To know in advance is like kids who open their Christmas presents before Christmas and then rewrap them hoping their parents won’t notice.

I wouldn’t want to know if I was pregnant.....

[GtHawk]

What ever happened to parents who wait until baby pops out to learn if it’s a boy or girl?

To know in advance is like kids who open their Christmas presents before Christmas and then rewrap them hoping their parents won’t notice.

I wouldn’t want to know if I was pregnant.....

Interesting, there are a couple of ways to read that statement 

[mountaineer]

WAS GAGA TARGETED? Lady Gaga cops probing whether dognapper shooting was ‘politically motivated’ after she sang at Biden’s inauguration
Exclusive
    Grant Hodgson, Mollie Mansfield, Teresa Roca and Jessica Kwong
    Feb 25 2021, 18:30 ETUpdated: Feb 26 2021, 0:50 ET

INVESTIGATORS are probing whether the kidnapping of Lady Gaga's bulldogs was politically motivated because she sang at President Joe Biden's inauguration.

FBI officials specialized in kidnapping and ransom cases are working with Los Angeles Police Department detectives, The Sun learned on Thursday.

"Lady Gaga is high profile of course but she sang at President Biden's inauguration which takes this case to another level," one source said.

"The FBI wants to know exactly what motivated this incident."

An FBI spokesperson told The Sun: "While the Bureau provides resources if/where requested to our local partners, I would refer you to LAPD for comment as they are leading this investigation." ...

The Sun

Thank goodness for the FBI. 

[catfish1957]

The Sun

Thank goodness for the FBI. 

Hell with the money, she sang at Biden's inauguration. /s

Political exploitation at it's best.  I hope everything comes out okay for the Frenchies, but hell with gag gag.

[sneakypete]

The Sun

Thank goodness for the FBI. 

@mountaineer

Thank goodness they don't have anything else to do that is more  than investigating the dognapping of a celeb's dogs.

[catfish1957]

@mountaineer

Thank goodness they don't have anything else to do that is more  than investigating the dognapping of a celeb's dogs.

Well the dog walker was shot in the process too.