Author Topic: Today's Toons 4/20/26 (Read 525 times)

pookie18 · « **on:** **Today** at 06:41:46 am »

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In Case You Missed It Dept.:

Fox News reported that U.S.-Iran peace negotiations in Pakistan fell apart after 21-hours when the Iranians refused the U.S. 15-point peace terms. On Sunday, Iran's Minister of Information announced they have just successfully tested their first nuclear weapon. They call it the Straits of Hormuz.

Californian Paul Randall pleaded guilty Thursday to orchestrating a Medicaid reimbursement fraud scheme in a criminal conspiracy with a local pharmacist that netted them $279 million. The arrest sends a clear message to anyone who'd defraud the California taxpayers. The limit is $269 million.

ABC Late Night host Jimmy Kimmel called Trump a war monger Monday. Then when Trump agreed to a cease fire on Tuesday Jimmy called Trump a chicken. Last night Jimmy performed a miracle during his monologue when a Republican audience member got up from his wheelchair and left.

President Trump warned the Iranian Revolutionary Guard Thursday that the oil tankers had better be allowed to pass through the Straits of Hormuz as agreed to by the Ayatollah. Gas prices are consolidating our drive-by shootings in L.A. Last week the Crips and the Bloods began carpooling.

The Minneapolis City Council is set to approve allowing public bath houses to operate in the city where customers are free to engage in sexual activity. This isn't going to end well. So when ICE stages a raid on illegal Somali migrants in these bath houses they may literally be pulling families apart.

Senate Democrats refused all calls this week to pass Voter ID even though 80% of Democrats favor it. The left wing is calling the shots. Progressives keep trying to pound a square peg into a round hole, and when they realize it won't fit, they go on cable news and call the hole a racist.

The White House dispute with Pope Leo is escalating out of control. President Trump just announced that the Vatican is 2 weeks away from developing a nuclear weapon.

The Artemis II splashed down just off San Diego as planned Friday after a week-long voyage to the dark side of the moon. They had no choice. A DC federal judge ordered that the crew of the Artemis II return to Earth, ruling that President Trump had no authority to send them out of the country.

JD Vance returned from Pakistan Sunday unable to persuade the Iranians to yield to Trump's demand to open the Straits of Hormuz and give up their enriched uranium. JD did experience one pleasant surprise. He found that Iranians are more reasonable than Democrats when it comes to Trump.

President Trump hosted a political dinner at the Trump Winery in Charlottesville, Virginia, Friday. It was a $1-million-a-plate dinner for rich MAGA donors. I can't think of a funnier Trump reply to all the No Kings protestors than to throw a banquet in a city named after King George III's wife.

Legendary TV comedy producer George Schlatter, 96, was honored at an event in Hollywood Monday. He's agreed to donate all the scripts from Laugh In and his comedy specials to the Smithsonian. Over the years only the voters have sent more jokes to Washington.

The tables have turned this week in Congress. Republicans are now demanding that the Democrats release the Swalwell Files.

Eric Swalwell was jettisoned by Democrats who leaked his well-known sexual misconduct and brought out his accusers to bury him. He exited the governor's race and resigned from Congress. Eric Swalwell's career crashed so hard that when it woke up, Bill Cosby was standing over it in his bathrobe.

Walt Disney's new CEO Josh D'Amaro announced 1,000 layoffs at Disney which will affect its movie, television and streaming operations. But the Disney theme parks are doing huge business thanks to the park's brand-new attractions. The Pirates of the Persian Gulf are depicted by real Iranians.

President Trump and Pope Leo aren't getting along at all. Neither likes the other's holier than thou attitude.

President Trump ordered the U.S. Navy to blockade all Iran's ports and prevent any ship from leaving or entering Iran. It was last successfully done by the U.S. against Cuba in 1962. However I am afraid the difference is, Trump isn't aided by Marilyn Monroe's wise counsel like Jack Kennedy was.

Fox News said 122 empty oil tankers are headed for U.S. for a refill. The rest of the tankers are trapped in the Straits, forming a circle and a Sloth Anonymous support group. The speaker opens with, Hi, I'm Exxon Valdez II, and I have been doing nothing for 3 weeks, and all the other tankers clap.

The US Navy blockade cost Iran $500 million today. To put that number in perspective that's enough money to pay Eric Swalwell's legal fees for the next two years.

Leave it to America to produce a Hitler with a street named after him in Jerusalem.

Ilhan Omar suddenly adjusted her net worth from $30 million to $15,000 today. This could only happen if her stockbroker told her 10 days ago to buy Swalwell, it's a sure thing.

The Strait of Hormuz has opened and closed more times than a Kardashian's legs at the NBA All-Star Weekend in Vegas.

-- Argus Hamilton