Author Topic: SEMI-NEWS/SEMI-SATIRE: November 30, 2025 Edition  (Read 68 times)

0 Members and 2 Guests are viewing this topic.

Offline John Semmens

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 39
  • Gender: Male
SEMI-NEWS/SEMI-SATIRE: November 30, 2025 Edition
« on: November 28, 2025, 09:47:50 pm »
Somali Fraud in America

Sympathy for the suffering that Somalis were enduring in their war-torn country in the 1990s led to the importation of thousands of them to the US. A huge number of them were relocated to Minnesota where they have since been able to elect Ilhan Omar to represent them in the US Congress. Others launched remarkably successful fraud schemes that have pilfered hundreds of millions of taxpayer dollars.

Welfare dependency among the Minnesota Somalis is 40%. Remittances to Somalia have amounted to billions of dollars. The ISIS- affiliated Al-Shabaab terror group taxes these remittances to fund their army. More than 20 of the Minnesota Somalis have been recruited and joined these terrorists. Feeding, autism, housing, and 25 other Somali scams have bilked taxpayers since Tim Walz became governor in 2019.

A few fraudsters have been successfully prosecuted. One of them, Abdifatah Yusuf, ran Promise Health, a so-called home healthcare company out of a post office mailbox. He was found guilty by a jury. Jury foreman Ben Walfoort explained "it was not a difficult decision. The deliberation took probably four hours at most. Based on the evidence that was presented, we found his guilt was beyond a reasonable doubt."

However, presiding Judge Sarah West dismissed the guilty verdict, saying "while the evidence presented was sufficient to persuade the jury it was not enough to persuade me. I can conceive of other explanations for the disappearance of the $7 million in this case. It could've been simple incompetence. As an immigrant from a backward country, Mr. Yusuf cannot not be expected to understand our laws or the arcane intricacies of the double-entry accounting that provides a method of tracking where every dollar came from and where it goes. Rather than send him to prison I think he should get a break."

President Trump cited these frauds in his request to reconsider the special status granted to Somali refugees, saying "the American taxpayers shouldn't have to bear the burdens some of these people are inflicting on them. The opportunity for life, liberty, and pursuit of happiness that was granted to them has been abused. Some of them aren't obeying our laws and earning an honest living. We're going to look at what they have done and deport the ones who haven't been keeping up their half of the bargain."

Trump's proposal was denounced as "deranged" by Rep. Omar (D-Minn). "He doesn't respect the cultural differences between our two countries. It is racist to try to impose white values on brown people. All must be free to do what they think is right without being judged and punished except by a jury of one's peers, which in these fraud cases would be comprised of 12 Somalis."

In related news, in Denmark 62% of Somali men are convicted of a violent crime by the time they've reached the age of 30. This statistic was also condemned by Omar "as just another example of whites trying to impose their values on others. In Somalia a young man learns from a young age that he must fight to live. Is he supposed to just forget this because he lives in Denmark or some other white country?"

Majority of Dems Refuse to Denounce Socialism

In an effort to shock Democrats out of their romantic delusions regarding what socialism has done to humans around the world, Rep. Maria Elvira Salazar (R-FL) introduced a resolution to denounce socialism. In the "whereas" section, the resolution listed the evil accomplishments of this ideology which included: "its collapse into totalitarian dictatorships that repressed individual liberty and resulted in the famine and mass murder deaths of over 100 million persons, and the widespread poverty of the survivors."

Contrasting the dismal history of socialism with the values for which the United States of America was founded: "the sanctity of the individual, to which the collectivist system of socialism in all of its forms is fundamentally and necessarily opposed" it was resolved "that Congress denounces socialism in all its forms, and opposes the implementation of socialist policies in the United States."

The resolution passed by a vote of 285 (199 Republicans and 86 Democrats) to 98 (all Democrats) opposed. Rep. Alexandria Ocasio Cortez explained her vote against the resolution, saying "I don't think it is appropriate for us to cut ourselves off from an option that has proven very popular in other countries. Can we say with absolute certainty that it was socialism rather than the unfaithful administration of its ideals by corrupt rulers that led to all the misery and death associated with socialism? Perhaps American know-how could make socialism succeed here when it has failed elsewhere. New York City voters have just opted to give socialism a chance to work in America. Let's see how Mamdani does before we reject the concept."

Rep. Salazar advised "against bucking the odds. Socialism is based on the idea that the government has no obligation to respect the liberty or property of each individual. Under socialism any individual's liberty and property can be taken away if the government decides that's what it wants to do. The notion that a democratically elected socialist government would act in opposition to its basic premise is foolish. The semi-socialist government we have now saw President Biden try to coerce everyone to take the unproven covid vaccine. Many Democrats advocate placing more and more burdens on the working people of the country in order to provide more and more benefits for the idle--including foreigners illegally residing here. Democracy by itself is no shield against the ravages of socialism if individual rights aren't secure."

In related news, Gov. Gavin Newsom (D-Calif) is advocating a retroactive billionaire tax of 5% of their net worth on billionaires who resided in the state during 2025. "The genius of this idea stems from the fact that billionaires won't be able to run away from this tax," he said. "Everyone else, including millionaires like myself, will get a free ride. If we had been doing this all along maybe all those folks who moved out because of high taxes might still be here."

Disagreement on Voter ID

This week, Elon Musk asked "why does the United States have the worst voter identification laws of any nation?" He went on to list more than 100 countries with stricter voter ID laws than we have in this country. He also pointed out that "both California and New York explicitly prohibit voters from showing their IDs in order to vote." He said "the only reason to do this is fraud."

Newly declared Democrat candidate for governor of California Rep. Eric Swalwell holds the opposite view. "Look, we've already outlawed IDs for voting in California," he pointed out. "We need to take the next step and allow people to vote by phone. People already do lots of stuff over the phone. They buy things, they make medical appointments, they place bets with their bookies. Why shouldn't they be allowed to vote by phone?"

"In the 2024 presidential election nearly 40% of those eligible to vote did not cast a ballot," Swalwell observed. "As a result, Trump won the presidency with only 31.6% of potential votes that could've been cast to the 30.7% that Vice-President Kamala Harris got. Is a 0.9% margin really a mandate? I don't think so. If votes could be made over the phone I bet that nearly 100% of the ballots would've been cast and Kamala would've won by a big margin."

"An additional benefit would be that there wouldn't be any controversies over hacking into voting machines or mystery ballots discovered car trunks or in some backroom," Swalwell boasted. "Not only would vote-by-phone max-out our democracy, it would also make our elections more secure than ever before. We need to stop the voter-suppression Republicans are trying to achieve and just go to a total vote-by-phone system."

In other voting news, Michigan Secretary of State Jocelyn Benson (D) will be running for governor next year. She will also be refereeing the election process. Republicans in the state have requested that the US Department of justice monitor polling sites to ensure transparency in the process. Benson objected, saying that "in Arizona Katie Hobbs was the Secretary of State and successfully oversaw her own election for governor. Why shouldn't I be permitted to do the same in Michigan?"