Vance ought to have a pretty nice portfolio of items to stick it to Fallz.
That fake folksy-ism is going to come across as dumbassery trying to defend "Tampons In the Boy's Room".
(Apologies to Brownsville Station)
Tampons in the Boy's Room
---------------------------------
How you doin' out there? Ya ever seem to have one of those days
Janitor's blocked the bathroom. putting a new device into a new case?
From your governor all the way down to your best girlfriend?
Well, ya know, I used to have 'em just about all the time
But I found a way to get out of 'em
Let me tell you about it
Sitting in the classroom, thinking it's a drag
Some fool in St. Paul is telling me I'm on the rag.
The noon bells rings, you know that's my cue
I'm gonna meet the boys on floor number two!
Tampon's in the boys' room
Tampon's in the boys' room
Now, teacher, don't you fill me up with your rules that bore
This f__king dispenser's going on the floor.
Checkin' out the halls, makin' sure the coast is clear
Lookin' in the stalls, "No, there ain't nobody here!"
Oh, my buddy Doug, and me and Jake
All have a bet this thing won't break.
Tampon's ' in the boys' room
Tampon's in the boys' room
Now, teacher, don't you fill me up with your rules and things
Because there's a 100 cotton things scattered if you want to pull strings.
Tampon's in the boy's room
Tampon's in the boy's room