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Offline sneakypete

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Humor/Jokes
« on: May 29, 2021, 11:20:58 am »
@mystery-ak

Myst,there should be a dedicated board/thread/whatever you call it for NOTHING but jokes and other humorous things.

I am NOT including humorous political slurs in this definition. Leave them for the political boards.

A thread where people can check in each day and maybe get a smile from it,if not a belly laugh. Who doesn't enjoy a good belly laugh to start off their day?

Anyhow,I am now watching DCI Banks on Brit Box,and one cop tells this joke to his female patrol partner.

"How can you identify a feminist?"

Answer,"She looks like ET".
« Last Edit: May 29, 2021, 11:43:21 am by sneakypete »
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Offline Cyber Liberty

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #1 on: May 29, 2021, 11:47:58 am »
:bkmk:
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Offline corbe

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #2 on: May 30, 2021, 02:26:04 pm »
    If yall are gonna make @sneakypete a Category Moderator, My time in here won't be for long.  Can he BAN me?       :rolling:
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Offline thackney

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #3 on: May 30, 2021, 02:32:45 pm »
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Offline jmyrlefuller

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #4 on: May 30, 2021, 02:34:54 pm »
I have moved the Silliness Thread to this category, where it fits.
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Offline corbe

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #5 on: May 30, 2021, 02:52:19 pm »
   It fits well here @jmyrlefuller good call, it's much better than Sports/Entertainment/Arts or wherever it was but should it be 'Members Only'?
   Just asking for a Friend.
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Offline Cyber Liberty

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #6 on: May 30, 2021, 03:12:04 pm »
Quote from: corbe on May 30, 2021, 02:52:19 pm
   It fits well here @jmyrlefuller good call, it's much better than Sports/Entertainment/Arts or wherever it was but should it be 'Members Only'?
   Just asking for a Friend.

Well, considering the Moderator I thought it was a smart move.  LOL!

Love ya, @sneakypete, and congrats on being named Moderator!  :beer: :beer: :beer: :beer: :beer: :beer:
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For unvaccinated, we are looking at a winter of severe illness and death — if you’re unvaccinated — for themselves, their families, and the hospitals they’ll soon overwhelm. Sloe Joe Biteme 12/16
I will NOT comply.
 
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Offline jmyrlefuller

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #7 on: May 30, 2021, 05:09:02 pm »
Quote from: corbe on May 30, 2021, 02:52:19 pm
   It fits well here @jmyrlefuller good call, it's much better than Sports/Entertainment/Arts or wherever it was but should it be 'Members Only'?
   Just asking for a Friend.
Well, it'll let us be even sillier than usual. Which, I am sure, certain members of this board will embrace.
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Offline sneakypete

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #8 on: May 30, 2021, 06:57:34 pm »
Quote from: corbe on May 30, 2021, 02:26:04 pm
    If yall are gonna make @sneakypete a Category Moderator, My time in here won't be for long.  Can he BAN me?       :rolling:

@corbe

Let it be known that I now have a brand new pair of shiny jackboots,and I am taking bribes/uhhh,accepting cash donations.
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Offline sneakypete

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #9 on: May 30, 2021, 07:00:49 pm »
BTW,I will be going back into the hospital for a few days tomorrow,so yall behave yourselves while I am gone.
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Offline corbe

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #10 on: May 30, 2021, 08:04:19 pm »
   Hospitals usually block all p0rn access @sneakypete
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Offline sneakypete

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #11 on: May 30, 2021, 09:44:07 pm »
Quote from: corbe on May 30, 2021, 08:04:19 pm
   Hospitals usually block all p0rn access @sneakypete

@corbe

Ok,so I will just have my ex visit me. She is between husbands right now,so that should work out ok.
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Offline corbe

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #12 on: May 30, 2021, 11:30:56 pm »
   Probably TMI but I had sex in a hospital patients bathroom, with the patient, complete with portable IV.  It was lousy.
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BassWrangler

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #13 on: May 31, 2021, 11:54:55 am »
OK, nice. I like this thread.

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BassWrangler

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #14 on: May 31, 2021, 11:55:21 am »
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Offline corbe

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #15 on: June 01, 2021, 05:33:05 pm »
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Offline corbe

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #16 on: June 01, 2021, 10:10:59 pm »
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Offline Cyber Liberty

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #17 on: June 01, 2021, 10:20:29 pm »
A Feather (weight) and a Red (splotch) Indian walk into a bar....
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Offline Cyber Liberty

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #18 on: June 01, 2021, 10:32:28 pm »
I've just about had it with this tomfoolery....


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2W8gADOplmY
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For unvaccinated, we are looking at a winter of severe illness and death — if you’re unvaccinated — for themselves, their families, and the hospitals they’ll soon overwhelm. Sloe Joe Biteme 12/16
I will NOT comply.
 
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Offline corbe

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #19 on: June 02, 2021, 11:09:41 am »
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Offline DCPatriot

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #20 on: June 02, 2021, 11:18:37 am »
Quote from: corbe on June 02, 2021, 11:09:41 am
https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/8a27b607972e064de2175954052091f8dd02101092ae7a6ade08d70a8f73d511.jpg

LOL!  I have that print framed/mounted in my living room.

It's says "ad occhi chiusi" on top and "OLD RACING" on the bottom.

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Offline corbe

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #21 on: June 02, 2021, 11:23:53 am »
   I had to look up that Italian "ad occhi chiusi" @DCPatriot in English it means "with your eyes closed", right?
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Offline DCPatriot

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #22 on: June 02, 2021, 11:46:30 am »
Quote from: corbe on June 02, 2021, 11:23:53 am
   I had to look up that Italian "ad occhi chiusi" @DCPatriot in English it means "with your eyes closed", right?

LOL!  You just taught me, @corbe

I bought it at a flea market already framed.  Seller told me it was a marketing campaign for an Italian Motorcycle company and quite popular back in the day. 
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"It aint what you don't know that kills you.  It's what you know that aint so!" ...Theodore Sturgeon

The idea that somebody looked at a purple onion and called it a red onion really bothers me.   

"It was only a sunny smile, and little it cost in the giving, but like morning light it scattered the night and made the day worth living" F. Scott Fitzgerald

Offline thackney

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #23 on: June 02, 2021, 12:42:07 pm »
Quote from: sneakypete on May 30, 2021, 07:00:49 pm
BTW,I will be going back into the hospital for a few days tomorrow,so yall behave yourselves while I am gone.

Today is day three...
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Offline corbe

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #24 on: June 02, 2021, 12:50:42 pm »
   Damn @thackney I hope he's OK or recovering well. 
   US OLD MEN heal a lot slower, it seems. I had 15 stitches 8 days ago and just put on jeans for the first time since.  Can't even mow my small yard or drive.

    Thank You @Texas Robin for EVERYTHING!!!!!!



     PS: I'm out of Cherry Bourbon Jell-O Shots.  66666heart
« Last Edit: June 02, 2021, 12:55:57 pm by corbe »
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Offline corbe

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #25 on: June 02, 2021, 01:11:24 pm »
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Offline Cyber Liberty

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #26 on: June 02, 2021, 04:46:29 pm »
Quote from: thackney on June 02, 2021, 12:42:07 pm
Today is day three...

We haven't heard from him yet, @thackney.
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For unvaccinated, we are looking at a winter of severe illness and death — if you’re unvaccinated — for themselves, their families, and the hospitals they’ll soon overwhelm. Sloe Joe Biteme 12/16
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BassWrangler

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #27 on: June 02, 2021, 05:05:17 pm »
Quote from: Cyber Liberty on June 02, 2021, 04:46:29 pm
We haven't heard from him yet, @thackney.

Thinking positive thoughts.
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Offline corbe

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #28 on: June 04, 2021, 03:48:12 pm »
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Offline andy58-in-nh

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #29 on: June 04, 2021, 04:39:00 pm »
Quote from: corbe on June 04, 2021, 03:48:12 pm


That looks suspiciously like my wife's bathroom sink. (Right, gentlemen?)

I don't even want to discuss the shower.
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Offline corbe

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #30 on: June 04, 2021, 05:01:15 pm »
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Offline sneakypete

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #31 on: June 04, 2021, 08:09:10 pm »
Quote from: thackney on June 02, 2021, 12:42:07 pm
Today is day three...

@thackney

AND......I'm back.

And in desperate need of some humor.
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Offline mystery-ak

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #32 on: June 04, 2021, 08:45:06 pm »
Quote from: sneakypete on June 04, 2021, 08:09:10 pm
@thackney

AND......I'm back.

And in desperate need of some humor.

We have been worried about you...
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Offline Lando Lincoln

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #33 on: June 04, 2021, 08:51:41 pm »
Quote from: mystery-ak on June 04, 2021, 08:45:06 pm
We have been worried about you...

Yes, we have!
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Offline DCPatriot

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #34 on: June 04, 2021, 09:20:32 pm »
Quote from: sneakypete on June 04, 2021, 08:09:10 pm
@thackney

AND......I'm back.

And in desperate need of some humor.

@sneakypete

Luv ya, buddy!    :beer:
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"It aint what you don't know that kills you.  It's what you know that aint so!" ...Theodore Sturgeon

The idea that somebody looked at a purple onion and called it a red onion really bothers me.   

"It was only a sunny smile, and little it cost in the giving, but like morning light it scattered the night and made the day worth living" F. Scott Fitzgerald

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #35 on: June 04, 2021, 10:03:16 pm »
Quote from: sneakypete on June 04, 2021, 08:09:10 pm
@thackney

AND......I'm back.

And in desperate need of some humor.

Welcome back, @sneakypete . Glad you made it back OK.

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Offline 240B

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #36 on: June 04, 2021, 10:08:01 pm »
My girlfriend who can't eat fries because they make her fat ...
ATE ALL MY FRIES!
Should I order you some?
NO! I can't have fries ...
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You cannot "COEXIST" with people who want to kill you.
If they kill their own with no conscience, there is nothing to stop them from killing you.
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Offline thackney

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #37 on: June 05, 2021, 08:48:06 am »
Quote from: sneakypete on June 04, 2021, 08:09:10 pm
@thackney

AND......I'm back.

And in desperate need of some humor.

Desperate humor I got

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Offline corbe

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #38 on: June 05, 2021, 09:05:51 am »
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Offline corbe

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #39 on: June 05, 2021, 09:12:21 am »
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Offline corbe

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #40 on: June 05, 2021, 09:23:11 am »
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Offline sneakypete

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #41 on: June 05, 2021, 02:57:36 pm »
Quote from: thackney on June 05, 2021, 08:48:06 am
Desperate humor I got



@thackney

DAYUM! You would think that I would have noticed something that obvious,wouldn't you?
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Offline sneakypete

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #42 on: June 05, 2021, 02:59:42 pm »
Quote from: corbe on June 05, 2021, 09:05:51 am


@corbe

THAT one should come accompanied with "WARNING,DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME!" in the biggest and reddest fonts available.

As a wise man once noted "Ah pity the fool!!"
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Offline 240B

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #43 on: June 05, 2021, 03:09:39 pm »
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You cannot "COEXIST" with people who want to kill you.
If they kill their own with no conscience, there is nothing to stop them from killing you.
Rational fear and anger at vicious murderous Islamic terrorists is the same as irrational antisemitism, according to the Leftists

Offline sneakypete

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #44 on: June 05, 2021, 03:20:39 pm »
Quote from: 240B on June 05, 2021, 03:09:39 pm


@240B
And most important of all,an off-shore bank account to accept donations.
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Offline 240B

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #45 on: June 05, 2021, 05:50:31 pm »
Quote from: sneakypete on June 05, 2021, 03:20:39 pm
@240B
And most important of all,an off-shore bank account to accept donations.
I call these people and the Pope "super-Atheists".
They don't just 'not believe in God'.
They make God their bitch.
You really have to have no fear of anything to walk the road they live on.
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You cannot "COEXIST" with people who want to kill you.
If they kill their own with no conscience, there is nothing to stop them from killing you.
Rational fear and anger at vicious murderous Islamic terrorists is the same as irrational antisemitism, according to the Leftists

Online Smokin Joe

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #46 on: June 06, 2021, 01:52:53 am »
Quote from: corbe on June 04, 2021, 05:01:15 pm

Dark forces lurk in computers, even 'dumb' ones...who says it was an accident?
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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #47 on: June 07, 2021, 05:43:49 pm »
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Offline corbe

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #48 on: June 08, 2021, 09:18:17 pm »
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Offline Wingnut

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Re: Humor/Jokes
« Reply #49 on: June 09, 2021, 09:29:50 am »
A biden favorite:

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