Romance Your Wife With These 8 Easy Tips From The Love Experts At . . .
May 21st, 2021It can be hard to figure out how to romance your wife. You're a busy man! But it's important to spend time working on your marriage. Luckily, we at The Babylon Bee are all males, and we are all happily married, and we're all preeeeetty much love experts.
So we've got experience, and you can learn from our expertise. Spice up your marriage with these handy tips.
1. Instead of leaving her to go golfing for six hours every Saturday, invite her to caddy for you. -- Don't leave her home all alone every weekend -- include her in your life! She'll love carrying your clubs and golf-clapping for your every stroke.
2. Wrestle a grizzly bear for her honor. - A sure way to win the heart of any woman. Time for a trip to the zoo!
3. Helpfully pause Lord of the Rings every scene to give her interesting behind-the-scenes facts about the movie. - "Now, the interesting thing about this scene, honey, is that Viggo Mortensen actually broke his toe while kicking that Uruk-Hai helmet." She'll be swooning in no time!
4. Get in the habit of every day saying, "Wow! Your hair looks great!" so you don't miss it when she actually gets it done. - You have to cover all your bases.
5. Snuggle in close to her and whisper, "Taxation is theft." - Talk about giving her goosebumps! Hubba hubba!
6. Women need a firm hand, just pick what you're having for dinner without any input from her - Don't sit there and suggest seventeen different restaurants like a chump. Just say, "Woman, we're getting steak." Total alpha move. She'll love it!
7. "Like" every TikTok video she sends you even though you don't understand them at all. - Even though none of the TikToks she sends you make any sense, throw her a bone with a "like" and maybe a laugh emoji once in a while. She'll think you totally get her.
8. Don't text or call her all day so she'll be more excited to talk to you when you get home. - You have to keep her wanting more!
https://babylonbee.com/news/romance-your-wife-with-these-8-easy-tips-from-the-love-experts-at-the-babylon-bee