Author Topic: Hypothetical question: How to get rid of a body (Read 5496 times)

240B · « **on:** February 12, 2018, 01:37:01 pm »

Hypothetically, as a joke, just as a exersiser, lets say for example, I have this body laying around that I need to something with it. What do I do with it? Ideas, examples, anything would be helpful, as a hypothetical, you know, idea

driftdiver · « **Reply #1 on:** February 12, 2018, 01:44:45 pm »

If you're in Florida there are several options. 1) wild hogs 2) alligators 3) crab traps sunk in the ocean, 4) dropping out to sea.

The everglades & swamps really aren't that viable because of the difficulty in getting out there and back without being seen. Number 3 &4 are really the best.

Not that Ive ever considered it.

WingNot · « **Reply #2 on:** February 12, 2018, 01:46:48 pm »

Space X Heavy Rocket with a Tesla Roadster. Room for two.

driftdiver · « **Reply #3 on:** February 12, 2018, 01:52:50 pm »

Quote from: Wingnut on February 12, 2018, 01:46:48 pm

Space X Heavy Rocket with a Tesla Roadster. Room for two.

I heard there was already a hooker in the trunk.

dfwgator · « **Reply #4 on:** February 12, 2018, 01:58:08 pm »

ABX · « **Reply #5 on:** February 12, 2018, 02:05:52 pm »

Very, very long hot fire, grind the remaining bones down to powder, release the ashes into the wind.

Oceander · « **Reply #6 on:** February 12, 2018, 02:07:36 pm »

Braise it with a little Chianti?

Restored · « **Reply #7 on:** February 12, 2018, 02:13:31 pm »

Keep the tenderloins. Everything else goes into a pond where there are snapping turtles.

Gefn · « **Reply #8 on:** February 12, 2018, 02:15:51 pm »

Call tony soprano

Cyber Liberty · « **Reply #9 on:** February 12, 2018, 02:23:21 pm »

1) Backhoe
2) Hole
3) Lime chips

(I had to find this out for a friend once. Fellow named Condidit.)

truth_seeker · « **Reply #10 on:** February 12, 2018, 02:23:30 pm »

Call Dexter. Didn't he weight bodies with stones, and dump them overboard, several nautical miles offshore?

(..the story purports to take place in Florida, but the series was mainly filmed in Long Beach California, BTW....a little Hollywierd trivia to hate California over...)

GrouchoTex · « **Reply #11 on:** February 12, 2018, 02:25:32 pm »

...asking for a friend?

XenaLee · « **Reply #12 on:** February 12, 2018, 02:36:30 pm »

Quote from: 240B on February 12, 2018, 01:37:01 pm

Hypothetically, as a joke, just as a exersiser, lets say for example, I have this body laying around that I need to something with it. What do I do with it? Ideas, examples, anything would be helpful, as a hypothetical, you know, idea

Lol! It depends upon whether or not you're a high-profile Democrat. If you are, Fort Marcy Park is always a good 1st choice spot. Neat, clean, no questions asked. Of course, there are other spots. Rock Creek Park would do if you are a lesser known Democrat. Make sure you dump the body AFTER the spots have already been thoroughly searched and checked now. It enhances the mystery.

If you're not a Democrat, don't even consider it. They'll nab you before you get out the door with da stiff.

WingNot · « **Reply #13 on:** February 12, 2018, 02:37:48 pm »

I'd call The Wolf.

dfwgator · « **Reply #14 on:** February 12, 2018, 02:37:56 pm »

roamer_1 · « **Reply #15 on:** February 12, 2018, 02:39:29 pm »

Quote from: 240B on February 12, 2018, 01:37:01 pm

Hypothetically, as a joke, just as a exersiser, lets say for example, I have this body laying around that I need to something with it. What do I do with it? Ideas, examples, anything would be helpful, as a hypothetical, you know, idea

What happens in the holler stays in the holler.
Jussayin.

WingNot · « **Reply #16 on:** February 12, 2018, 02:41:56 pm »

Quote from: dfwgator on February 12, 2018, 02:37:56 pm

That's him!

Frank Cannon · « **Reply #17 on:** February 12, 2018, 02:44:20 pm »

Prop it up in your living room. If the cops catch you just say you thought they were sleeping.

andy58-in-nh · « **Reply #18 on:** February 12, 2018, 02:46:54 pm »

Quote from: dfwgator on February 12, 2018, 02:37:56 pm

Ah, yes: the old body-in-the-trunk, compact-the-car-into-a-cube and ship-it-off-to-be-melted-down trick.

anubias · « **Reply #19 on:** February 12, 2018, 02:47:10 pm »

They do it with barrels of some sort of acid on â€œThe Blacklistâ€. One body per barrel seems to be the preferred ratio.

driftdiver · « **Reply #20 on:** February 12, 2018, 02:50:23 pm »

Quote from: Cyber Liberty on February 12, 2018, 02:23:21 pm

1) Backhoe
2) Hole
3) Lime chips

(I had to find this out for a friend once. Fellow named Condidit.)

Lady near here did that but got caught. She stole a winning lottery ticket and killed the guy. Used a backhoe to dig a 10ft deep hole. She forgot the lime and dogs found it. I know a cop who helped dig it up.

RoosGirl · « **Reply #21 on:** February 12, 2018, 02:52:57 pm »

Quote from: driftdiver on February 12, 2018, 01:44:45 pm

If you're in Florida there are several options. 1) wild hogs 2) alligators 3) crab traps sunk in the ocean, 4) dropping out to sea.

The everglades & swamps really aren't that viable because of the difficulty in getting out there and back without being seen. Number 3 &4 are really the best.

Not that Ive ever considered it.

You don't have to go out to the swamps to find gators. Lake Jessup, a 30 minute jaunt from downtown Orlando, has the highest population density of gators of any lake in the state. It's the lake that they relocate wayward gators to.

dfwgator · « **Reply #22 on:** February 12, 2018, 02:56:42 pm »

Quote from: andy58-in-nh on February 12, 2018, 02:46:54 pm

Ah, yes: the old body-in-the-trunk, compact-the-car-into-a-cube and ship-it-off-to-be-melted-down trick.

"So pretty please, with sugar on top....clean the [.......] car."

WingNot · « **Reply #23 on:** February 12, 2018, 03:20:26 pm »

Quote from: dfwgator on February 12, 2018, 02:56:42 pm

"So pretty please, with sugar on top....clean the [.......] car."

"Now boys, listen up. We're going to a place called Monster Joe's Truck and Tow."

Gefn · « **Reply #24 on:** February 12, 2018, 03:46:37 pm »

Quote from: driftdiver on February 12, 2018, 02:50:23 pm

Lady near here did that but got caught. She stole a winning lottery ticket and killed the guy. Used a backhoe to dig a 10ft deep hole. She forgot the lime and dogs found it. I know a cop who helped dig it up.

Weird, that was just on "Snapped" the other night.
@driftdiver

driftdiver · « **Reply #25 on:** February 12, 2018, 03:50:10 pm »

Quote from: Freya on February 12, 2018, 03:46:37 pm

Weird, that was just on "Snapped" the other night.
@driftdiver

He said once they got about 4 feet down they could smell the body. They had the people from the university come help to dig it up to preserve evidence.

Gefn · « **Reply #26 on:** February 12, 2018, 04:00:31 pm »

Quote from: driftdiver on February 12, 2018, 03:50:10 pm

He said once they got about 4 feet down they could smell the body. They had the people from the university come help to dig it up to preserve evidence.

I guess she should have asked the people who got rid of JImmy Hoffa. (Ooh, I apologize)

240B · « **Reply #27 on:** February 16, 2018, 03:50:52 pm »

i am surprised very surprised.

I was trying to come across as some kind of mafios thug.

I thought I was pretty good at it?

I didn't fool any of you guys. Not a single one.

I hate all you guys.

RoosGirl · « **Reply #28 on:** February 16, 2018, 03:58:41 pm »

Quote from: 240B on February 16, 2018, 03:50:52 pm

i am surprised very surprised.

I was trying to come across as some kind of mafios thug.

I thought I was pretty good at it?

I didn't fool any of you guys. Not a single one.

I hate all you guys.

Why would a mafia thug need advice from us nerds on how to get rid of a body?

We hate you too.

Sanguine · « **Reply #29 on:** February 16, 2018, 04:07:17 pm »

Quote from: driftdiver on February 12, 2018, 02:50:23 pm

Lady near here did that but got caught. She stole a winning lottery ticket and killed the guy. Used a backhoe to dig a 10ft deep hole. She forgot the lime and dogs found it. I know a cop who helped dig it up.

That was no lady.

the_doc · « **Reply #30 on:** February 16, 2018, 04:13:37 pm »

@240B

Look up the Standard Hotel in West Hollywood.

240B · « **Reply #31 on:** February 16, 2018, 04:20:57 pm »

Quote from: RoosGirl on February 16, 2018, 03:58:41 pm

Why would a mafia thug need advice from us nerds on how to get rid of a body?

It doesn't matter Got rid of it last week.

Elderberry · « **Reply #32 on:** February 16, 2018, 04:32:10 pm »

Cyber Liberty · « **Reply #33 on:** February 16, 2018, 05:03:39 pm »

Quote from: the_doc on February 16, 2018, 04:13:37 pm

@240B

Look up the Standard Hotel in West Hollywood.

Check for the name "Schiff" in the registry.

Weird Tolkienish Figure · « **Reply #34 on:** February 16, 2018, 05:16:09 pm »

Chop it up into pieces, put it into garbage bags. put those bags into more garbage bags. Toss them into a random dumpster late at night.

the_doc · « **Reply #35 on:** February 16, 2018, 05:26:40 pm »

@Cyber Liberty
@Sanguine

Quote from: Cyber Liberty on February 16, 2018, 05:03:39 pm

Check for the name "Schiff" in the registry.

Ah, I see you surf the same websites (and maybe youtube video channels?) that I follow. (It leaves me very little time for TBR.)

If even a small percentage of the awful stories are real, they are horrible enough to explain why I said on another thread started by Jazzhead that Trump's most vicious enemies are literally fighting for their very lives.

roamer_1 · « **Reply #36 on:** February 16, 2018, 05:29:52 pm »

Quote from: Sanguine on February 16, 2018, 04:07:17 pm

That was no lady.

Because she can run a backhoe?

Sanguine · « **Reply #37 on:** February 16, 2018, 06:02:20 pm »

Quote from: roamer_1 on February 16, 2018, 05:29:52 pm

Because she can run a backhoe?

No, your standard well rounded lady should know how to run a backhoe. At least it's that way in my neck of the woods.

roamer_1 · « **Reply #38 on:** February 16, 2018, 06:06:38 pm »

Quote from: Sanguine on February 16, 2018, 06:02:20 pm

No, your standard well rounded lady should know how to run a backhoe. At least it's that way in my neck of the woods.

That's right - Or at least be able to drag the chain... A 'great hooker' might be a compliment in these parts.

Sanguine · « **Reply #39 on:** February 16, 2018, 06:10:59 pm »

Quote from: roamer_1 on February 16, 2018, 06:06:38 pm

That's right - Or at least be able to drag the chain... A 'great hooker' might be a compliment in these parts.

I'm afraid I don't know much about the latter.

Wingnut · « **Reply #40 on:** February 16, 2018, 07:41:16 pm »

Quote from: roamer_1 on February 16, 2018, 05:29:52 pm

Because she can run a backhoe?

They say, Once you go backhoe you never go back.

RoosGirl · « **Reply #41 on:** February 16, 2018, 07:46:06 pm »

Quote from: The Ghost on February 16, 2018, 07:41:16 pm

They say, Once you go backhoe you never go back.

Oh hey, welcome back.

sneakypete · « **Reply #42 on:** February 16, 2018, 07:47:49 pm »

Chili for the homeless.

RoosGirl · « **Reply #43 on:** February 16, 2018, 07:49:59 pm »

Quote from: sneakypete on February 16, 2018, 07:47:49 pm

Chili for the homeless.

LOL Another reason to be thankful that I'm not homeless.

austingirl · « **Reply #44 on:** February 16, 2018, 08:50:00 pm »

Quote from: anubias on February 12, 2018, 02:47:10 pm

They do it with barrels of some sort of acid on â€œThe Blacklistâ€. One body per barrel seems to be the preferred ratio.

Excellent episode. I was going to make the same suggestion!

verga · « **Reply #45 on:** February 16, 2018, 10:21:20 pm »

The best method is to feed it tot he hogs. They will eat everything and leave no evidence. Make sure you remove all the jewelry......I'm just saying.

corbe · « **Reply #46 on:** February 17, 2018, 05:13:10 pm »

A shallow Texas grave with a dash of dismemberment, garnished with lime chips worked on me.

Taxcontrol · « **Reply #47 on:** February 17, 2018, 05:42:17 pm »

If you have the time ....

55 gallon drum
put the body in,
add live meal worms and cover
{wait like 30 days}
When the flesh is gone, place the drum on top of cement blocks formed in an "H"
put charcoal in on on side of the open H
keep a low fire going for a day or two to dry out the drum
stir contents of drum with an iron bar (5/8" rebar or pipe)
drill air holes into the drum
add a bucket of coal to the contents of the drum and burn a second time
after the coal starts to burn down, add some chunks of wood
wait till cool
pulverize into dust
till the dust into your garden
cut up drum into metal sheets
dispose of metal sheets, iron bar

anubias · « **Reply #48 on:** February 17, 2018, 08:31:37 pm »

Quote from: austingirl on February 16, 2018, 08:50:00 pm

Excellent episode. I was going to make the same suggestion!

I loves me some James Spader. ;).

ABX · « **Reply #49 on:** February 18, 2018, 11:51:56 pm »

Don't let this distract you from the fact that in 1966, Al Bundy scored four touchdowns in a single game while playing for the Polk High School Panthers in the 1966 city championship game versus Andrew Johnson High School, including the game-winning touchdown in the final seconds against his old nemesis, "Spare Tire" Dixon.

Author Topic: Hypothetical question: How to get rid of a body (Read 5496 times)

Oceander