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If You Haven't Pooped In Days, Here's What You Should Do:Three crappy green chili burritos and a triple mocha.Plus, what to do if it's been WEEKS.:Corkscrew, lightweight chain, tow strap, and a pickup truck (or backhoe, of course).
Or you could be like the mathematician. Work it out with a pencil....
I'm not a mathematician. I'm a carpenter.