The Official TBR Silliness Thread: 2013-2016

[Paladin]

[DCPatriot]

LOL!  Love it!

[Machiavelli]

[Machiavelli]

From 2013:


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cIdKIM2btoA


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cIdKIM2btoA

[Formerly Once-Ler]

From 2013:


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cIdKIM2btoA

That was great.  Thank you.

[Formerly Once-Ler]

Grant ‏@GrantGambling 7h7 hours ago

"You're young, so I don't consider you losers—but I doubt you'll ever be as rich as me. But make America great again"

[famousdayandyear]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=31FFTx6AKmU

[Paladin]

[Machiavelli]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ufGlBv8Z3NU


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ufGlBv8Z3NU

[Formerly Once-Ler]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ufGlBv8Z3NU

Good stuff!  Thanx for sharing.

[DCPatriot]

[jmyrlefuller]

[alicewonders]

[Paladin]

Random thoughts provided by a FB buddy.

The location of your mailbox shows you how far away from your house you can be in a robe, before you start looking like a mental patient.

My therapist said that my narcissism causes me to misread social situations. I'm pretty sure she was hitting on me.

My 60 year kindergarten reunion is coming up soon and I'm worried about the 195 lbs. I've gained.

I'm getting kind of tired always slowly raising my hand when someone asks, "Who does something like that?!?"

I always wondered what the job application is like at Hooters. Do they just give you a bra and say, "here fill this out?"

Four-time NASCAR Sprint Cup champion Jeff Gordon announced that this will be his final season of racing. You could tell it was time for him to retire during his last race when he had his blinker on the whole time.

The speed in which a woman says "nothing" when asked "What's wrong?" is inversely proportional to the severity of the shit storm that's coming.

Denny's has a slogan, 'If it's your birthday, the meal is on us.' If you're in Denny's and it's your birthday, your life sucks!

If I make you breakfast in bed, a simple "Thank you" is all I need...not all this, "how did you get in my house" business!

The pharmacist asked me my birthday again today. I’m pretty sure she's going to get me something.

On average, an American man will have sex two to three times a week; whereas a Japanese man will have sex only one or two times a year. This is upsetting news to me. I had no idea I was Japanese.

I think it's pretty cool how Chinese people made a language entirely out of tattoos.

What is it about a car that makes people think we can't see them pick their nose?

When I die I want to be reincarnated as a spider. Just so I can finally hear a women say "Oh my God, it's huge!"

[Machiavelli]

Random thoughts provided by a FB buddy.

 

[Formerly Once-Ler]

Random thoughts provided by a FB buddy.

Good stuff.  Thanx for the Sunday funnies.

[Machiavelli]

[alicewonders]

Watch out for that dihydrogen monoxide - especially when it's orange!

[Machiavelli]

Hillary Clinton Says Chelsea Erased Servers During Postpartum Depression

Mark Donahue
The Daily Rash
August 19, 2015

This afternoon Democratic presidential frontrunner, Hillary Clinton, appeared on MSNBC’s Hardball with host Chris Matthews to discuss the missing emails from her time as Secretary of State. Following is a transcript of that interview which airs at 6 pm tonight on MSNBC.

More

[Machiavelli]

[Formerly Once-Ler]

[Formerly Once-Ler]

http://www.twitlonger.com/show/n_1snbhd1
Brian Fraley · @Dailytakes

29th Aug 2015 from TwitLonger
Breaking....Trump's foreign policy speech leaked.

@BradThor, how close am I?

"These other guys running with their vision and plans. Big deal. What's that? Nothing. Just a speech or whatever. Those guys are all losers. I don't like losers. I like winners. That's why our military under Trump will be great. Just great. The best. No one will mess with us because we'll be the greatest. And China and Russia? I know how to deal with them, ok? I deal with them all the time. I love them. They're tough. But I'll be tougher. I am tougher. I know how to deal. No one's better. I wrote the book, literally, on the deal. The Art of the Deal, you've read it? Tremendous, right? No more of this reset stuff. I mean, a button? C'mon. Am I right? A button. Give me a break. So we'll be tougher and stronger and safer with Trump. I'll bring back pride in our flag. Look at that flag. Isn't it beautiful? The best. The Red White and Blue. That stands for Freedom and Liberty and so does Trump. That's how we make America Great Again (TM)."

[Formerly Once-Ler]

[Paladin]

My FB buddy strikes again.

THESE ARE ACTUAL COMPLAINTS RECEIVED BY "THOMAS COOK VACATIONS" FROM DISSATISFIED CUSTOMERS:

1. "On my holiday to Goa in India, I was disgusted to find that almost every restaurant served curry. I don't like spicy food."

2. "They should not allow topless sunbathing on the beach. It was very distracting for my husband who just wanted to relax."

3. "We went on holiday to Spain and had a problem with the taxi drivers as they were all Spanish."

4. "We booked an excursion to a water park but no-one told us we had to bring our own swimsuits and towels. We assumed it would be included in the price."

5. "The beach was too sandy. We had to clean everything when we returned to our room."

6. "We found the sand was not like the sand in the brochure. Your brochure shows the sand as white but it was more yellow."

7. "It's lazy of the local shopkeepers in Puerto Vallartato close in the afternoons. I often needed to buy things during 'siesta' time -- this should be banned."

8. "No-one told us there would be fish in the water. The children were scared."

9. "Although the brochure said that there was a fully equipped kitchen, there was no egg-slicer in the drawers."

10. "I think it should be explained in the brochure that the local convenience store does not sell proper biscuits like custard creams or ginger nuts."

11. "The roads were uneven and bumpy, so we could not read the local guide book during the bus ride to the resort. Because of this, we were unaware of many things that would have made our holiday more fun."

12. "It took us nine hours to fly home from Jamaica to England. It took the Americans only three hours to get home. This seems unfair."

13. "I compared the size of our one-bedroom suite to our friends' three-bedroom and ours was significantly smaller."

14. "The brochure stated: 'No hairdressers at the resort.' We're trainee hairdressers and we think they knew and made us wait longer for service."

15. "When we were in Spain, there were too many Spanish people there. The receptionist spoke Spanish, the food was Spanish. No one told us that there would be so many foreigners."

16. "We had to line up outside to catch the boat and there was no air-conditioning."

17. "It is your duty as a tour operator to advise us of noisy or unruly guests before we travel."

18. "I was bitten by a mosquito. The brochure did not mention mosquitoes."

19. "My fiancée and I requested twin-beds when we booked, but instead we were placed in a room with a king bed. We now hold you responsible and want to be re-reimbursed for the fact that I became pregnant. This would not have happened if you had put us in the room that we booked."

BE AWARE ... THEY WALK AMONG US and THEY VOTE!

[Formerly Once-Ler]

We take Gotham from the corrupt! The rich! The oppressors of generations who have kept you down with myths of opportunity, and we give it back to you... the people. Gotham is yours. None shall interfere. Do as you please. Start by storming Blackgate, and freeing the oppressed! Step forward those who would serve. For and army will be raised. The powerful will be ripped from their decadent nests, and cast out into the cold world that we know and endure. Courts will be convened. Spoils will be enjoyed. Blood will be shed. The police will survive, as they learn to serve true justice. This great city... it will endure. Gotham will survive!

[Paladin]

[Lando Lincoln]

[Machiavelli]

 

[Lando Lincoln]

Not sure where to put this but just watch Bartolo Colon:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zp-27Sb-Vyg

[Machiavelli]

[Formerly Once-Ler]

[Machiavelli]

[Godzilla]

Hey!  Who's taking pictures of me!?!

[Godzilla]

Here's some brain-asploding weirdness.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=erh2ngRZxs0


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j0_fVzTJO-8

[Machiavelli]

[Godzilla]

AMV Hell 3 - long, but I daresay that there isn't a person alive that won't laugh at some point in it.

http://www.veoh.com/watch/v19748291bY3YttGy

[Oceander]

[Formerly Once-Ler]

[EdinVA]

A group of men, all age 40, discussed where they should meet for lunch. Finally it was agreed that they would meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the waitresses there were gorgeous, with tight skirts, lean legs and very attractive.

Ten years later, at age 50, the friends once again discussed where they should meet for lunch. Finally it was agreed that they meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the food and service were good and the wine selection was excellent.

Ten years later, at age 60, the friends again discussed where they should meet for lunch. Finally it was agreed that they would meet at the Ocean View restaurant because they could dine in peace and quiet and the restaurant had a beautiful view of the ocean.

Ten years later, at age 70, the friends discussed where they should meet for lunch Finally it was agreed that they would meet at the Ocean View restaurant because the restaurant was wheelchair accessible and had a lift.

Ten years later, at age 80, the friends discussed where they should meet for lunch. Finally it was agreed that they would meet at the Ocean View Restaurant because they had never been there before and had heard it was quite good.

[EdinVA]

As an atheist was walking through the woods.  He said to himself:

'What majestic trees!’

'What powerful rivers!’

'What beautiful animals!'

As he was walking alongside the river, he heard a rustling in the bushes behind him.

He turned to look and saw a 7-foot grizzly bear charge towards him.

He ran as fast as he could up the path.  He looked over his shoulder and saw that the bear was closing in on him.

He looked over his shoulder again, and the bear was even closer.

He tripped and fell on the ground.

He rolled over to pick himself up but saw that the bear was right on top of him, reaching for him with his left paw and raising his right paw to strike him.

At that instant moment, the Atheist cried out:  'Oh my God!'

Time stopped.

The bear froze.

The forest was silent.

As a bright light shone upon the man, a voice came out of the sky.

'You deny my existence for all these years, teach others I don't exist and even credit creation to cosmic accident.'

'Do you expect me to help you out of this predicament?'

'Am I to count you as a believer?'

The atheist looked directly into the light, and said:  'It would be hypocritical of me to suddenly ask you to treat me as a Christian now, but perhaps you could make the BEAR a Christian?'

'Very well', said the voice.

The light went out.  The sounds of the forest resumed.

And the bear dropped his right paw, brought both paws together, bowed his head & spoke:


'Lord bless this food, which I am about to receive from Thy bounty through Christ our Lord, Amen.'

[EC]

[alicewonders]

Two great stories Ed!

 

[Paladin]

[Formerly Once-Ler]

http://dailycurrant.com/2015/09/07/sarah-palin-native-americans-should-go-back-to-nativia-3/

Politics
Sarah Palin: ‘Native Americans Should Go Back to Nativia’

Sarah Palin claimed today that Native Americans should leave America and go back to their homeland 'Nativia'.

In an interview with Fox News this morning, the former Alaskan governor was asked about her support of Donald Trump and his controversial views on immigration.

"I love immigrants," she told Fox and Friends host Steve Doocey, "But like Donald Trump, I just think we have too darn many in this country.

"Mexican-Americans, Asian-Americans, Native-Americans - they're changing up the cultural mix in the United States away from what it used to be in the days of our Founding Fathers.

"I think we should go to some of these groups and just ask politely - would you mind going home? Would you mind giving us our country back?"

"Sarah you know I love you," Doocey interjected, "And I think that's a great idea with regards to Mexicans. But where are the Native Americans supposed to go? They don't really have a place to go back to do they?"

"Well I think they should go back to Nativia or wherever they came from," Palin replied -- as the show's co-hosts sat in stunned silence.

"The liberal media treats Native Americans like they're gods. As if they just have some sort of automatic right to be in this country. But I say if they can't learn to get off those horses and start speaking American - then they should be sent home too."

Native Americans are descended from the first inhabitants of the North American continent. They have no cultural or familial ties to other parts of the world.

Sarah Palin was the Republican Party's nominee for Vice-President in 2008. She served as the Alaskan governor from 2006 to 2009.

[DCPatriot]

I simply don't believe this.   

[aligncare]

Of course it's parody. Reads like something John Semmons could have written.

[EdinVA]

Two great stories Ed!

 

 

[DCPatriot]

IMO, you guyz are crapping all over the floors. 

This page looks like a college dorm game room after a party.

There's a category for political graphics.   Please use it.

 

[Machiavelli]

[Godzilla]

http://dailycurrant.com/2015/09/07/sarah-palin-native-americans-should-go-back-to-nativia-3/

Politics
Sarah Palin: ‘Native Americans Should Go Back to Nativia’

Sarah Palin claimed today that Native Americans should leave America and go back to their homeland 'Nativia'.

In an interview with Fox News this morning, the former Alaskan governor was asked about her support of Donald Trump and his controversial views on immigration.

"I love immigrants," she told Fox and Friends host Steve Doocey, "But like Donald Trump, I just think we have too darn many in this country.

"Mexican-Americans, Asian-Americans, Native-Americans - they're changing up the cultural mix in the United States away from what it used to be in the days of our Founding Fathers.

"I think we should go to some of these groups and just ask politely - would you mind going home? Would you mind giving us our country back?"

"Sarah you know I love you," Doocey interjected, "And I think that's a great idea with regards to Mexicans. But where are the Native Americans supposed to go? They don't really have a place to go back to do they?"

"Well I think they should go back to Nativia or wherever they came from," Palin replied -- as the show's co-hosts sat in stunned silence.

"The liberal media treats Native Americans like they're gods. As if they just have some sort of automatic right to be in this country. But I say if they can't learn to get off those horses and start speaking American - then they should be sent home too."

Native Americans are descended from the first inhabitants of the North American continent. They have no cultural or familial ties to other parts of the world.

Sarah Palin was the Republican Party's nominee for Vice-President in 2008. She served as the Alaskan governor from 2006 to 2009.

Daily Currant...  satire website.