The solitary Senate life of John Fetterman

[mountaineer]

The solitary Senate life of John Fetterman
The Spectator

For months, John Fetterman has taken up a solitary post in the Russell Senate Office Building’s courtyard, where he makes the diner in Edward Hopper’s “Nighthawks” look like a raver at E11EVEN MIAMI.

Multiple Senate staff in different offices have spotted him camped out throughout the year while the Senate is in session — a luxury that their bosses simply do not have the time to afford. Fetterman’s quiet times are an open secret to those who work on Capitol Hill, yet, quelle surprise, they have gone completely unmentioned by the press corps.

It’s not just that Fetterman sits alone, however. He doesn’t seem to want to even do his job. Plenty of ink has been spilled about his dress code, or lack thereof, but Cockburn has noticed that on the days that he does show up to actually vote, he just yells “yay” or “nay” from the cloakroom and dips out, opting against schmoozing with his fellow senators of either political party…

To be fair, he does show up often enough to blather incoherently:

https://twitter.com/RNCResearch/status/1717581430807576945

[Fishrrman]

The Pubbies had better get busy finding a possible opponent to him.

If they don't, Fetterman will probably win re-election.
Easily.

[Wingnut]

There is nothing more dangerous than Festerman being left alone with his thoughts.

[GtHawk]

There is nothing more dangerous than Festerman being left alone with his thoughts.

There is nothing more dangerous than Festerman being left alone with his wife's thoughts.

Fessterman like Brandon is in charge of and decides nothing, it's Fessterman's communist controller that makes all his decisions.

[Weird Tolkienish Figure]

Wonder what his Halloween costume will be?

[Wingnut]

There is nothing more dangerous than Festerman being left alone with his wife's thoughts.

Fessterman like Brandon is in charge of and decides nothing, it's Fessterman's communist controller that makes all his decisions.

I stand corrected!   LOL

[mountaineer]

Colleagues Compliment John Fetterman On His Excellent Frankenstein Costume
U.S. · Oct 31, 2023 · BabylonBee.com

WASHINGTON, D.C. — The award for best costume at this year's Senate Halloween Social was all but a foregone conclusion, as all of Senator John Fetterman's colleagues almost unanimously recognized him on his outstanding Frankenstein costume.

"It's a totally perfect depiction," said Senator Chuck Schumer. "I literally thought Dr. Frankenstein's monster himself had walked into the Senate chamber. If I didn't already know John, I would have never thought he was actually a senator. He looks absolutely nothing like one."

Fetterman seemed unfazed by the adulation for his costume. "It's almost as if he didn't know what we were talking about when we told him his costume was great," said Lindsey Graham. "He just stared at us with this blank, glazed-over stare. Now that I think of it, that's the only facial expression I've ever seen him have. Uncanny resemblance." ...

To be fair, he's kind of a hybrid Frankenstein's monster-Uncle Fester character.

[Weird Tolkienish Figure]

To be fair, he's kind of a hybrid Frankenstein's monster-Uncle Fester character.

Dressed like he's about to go to Walmart.