Online Dating Is Changing the Nature of Society

[jmyrlefuller]

https://getpocket.com/explore/item/first-evidence-that-online-dating-is-changing-the-nature-of-society

Not so long ago, nobody met a partner online. Then, in the 1990s, came the first dating websites.

Match.com went live in 1995. A new wave of dating websites, such as OKCupid, emerged in the early 2000s. And the 2012 arrival of Tinder changed dating even further. Today, more than one-third of marriages start online.

Clearly, these sites have had a huge impact on dating behavior. But evidence is emerging that their effect is much more profound.



Loose ties have traditionally played a key role in meeting partners. While most people were unlikely to date one of their best friends, they were highly likely to date people who were linked with their group of friends; a friend of a friend, for example. In the language of network theory, dating partners were embedded in each other’s networks.

Indeed, this has long been reflected in surveys of the way people meet their partners: through mutual friends, in bars, at work, in educational institutions, at church, through their families, and so on.

Online dating has changed that. Today, online dating is the second most common way for heterosexual couples to meet. For homosexual couples, it is far and away the most popular.

(excerpt)

[jmyrlefuller]

So basically online dating—which I have tried and failed repeatedly with no success at even landing a date—is sucking all the life out of all other forms of courtship that used to give us opportunities to meet potential partners.

I want to bleeping scream. And cry.

[Wingnut]

Dating is as old as time.  Finding a fine piece of ass may be found online but it is best found in it's natural habitat

[libertybele]

So basically online dating—which I have tried and failed repeatedly with no success at even landing a date—is sucking all the life out of all other forms of courtship that used to give us opportunities to meet potential partners.

I want to bleeping scream. And cry.

Don't scream nor cry. I'm not so sure that on-line dating is all that.  IMO these days, I wouldn't want to meet someone on line. You never know the whack-a-do's that are out there. You WILL meet somebody when it is meant to be. As I tried to convey to you before, you will meet someone when you least expect it and when you're not so focused on looking for someone. Perhaps you need to venture a bit out of your area.  If you can, maybe take a cruise, take a vacation., who knows.

There's no reason that you can't meet women the typical way; through friends, acquaintances, church groups, libraries, parties, supermarkets, drug stores, parks, ballparks, etc.

Sounds like you're having a rough day.  Hang in there @jmyrlefuller !!!!

[Kamaji]

@jmyrlefuller

Just out of curiosity - and please feel free to tell me to mind my own ps and qs - have you ever tried speed dating?

[jmyrlefuller]

@jmyrlefuller

Just out of curiosity - and please feel free to tell me to mind my own ps and qs - have you ever tried speed dating?

There is no speed dating—nor any real infrastructures for singles to meet in an environment expressly for dating—where I live.

[Kamaji]

There is no speed dating—nor any real infrastructures for singles to meet in an environment expressly for dating—where I live.

Ahhh.  Sorry about that.  I've known some people for whom it worked.

[jmyrlefuller]

On a broader scale, this really shows something about the total collapse in our institutions. It's no surprise that most millennials have turned their back on institutions of all sorts—which is a couple of generations in the making, as the children of no-fault divorce have come of age. Separate studies have shown the rate of marriage is declining rapidly, the age at which people do marry is going higher and higher, and as a result, fewer and fewer children are being born (we are now well below replacement here in the USA). So it's not like it's a broader pot and online dating is matching up people who wouldn't otherwise find someone through mutual connection. No—mutual connections no longer connect couples anymore the way they used to.

[libertybele]

On a broader scale, this really shows something about the total collapse in our institutions. It's no surprise that most millennials have turned their back on institutions of all sorts—which is a couple of generations in the making, as the children of no-fault divorce have come of age. Separate studies have shown the rate of marriage is declining rapidly, the age at which people do marry is going higher and higher, and as a result, fewer and fewer children are being born (we are now well below replacement here in the USA). So it's not like it's a broader pot and online dating is matching up people who wouldn't otherwise find someone through mutual connection. No—mutual connections no longer connect couples anymore the way they used to.

...hmm.... you may be right about the mutual connections.  That is how I met my husband, but I ran into a friend who I hadn't seen in a couple of years at a store by pure coincidence and she invited me to a party a few weeks later. 

I agree. I believe the rate of marriage is declining due to the moral decay in our society. It used to be people did not co-habitat before getting married, now that has become more the norm and certainly years ago, woman were shamed if they had a child out of wedlock and now it's not frowned upon so much.  It's definitely not a baseball and apple pie type of society anymore.

Out of curiosity, do you live in a small town??

[roamer_1]

While successful at it to some degree, I have found online dating to be an horrible venue. One which I have firmly discarded. It's a bloody meat market, and nothing more. At least that is the case in those over 50.

That is not to say that I did not find a couple interesting pass-times... One of which lasted 6 months or so... but on the whole, out of 10 or so successful  leads (lasting two or more dates, let's say) only two were of a high quality with actually marriage-able prospect being rare.

However, I must say that if all I was after was getting lucky, my prospects were higher on average than I would have expected out of my younger self, even gimped up

I am not after a hook-up. So I have abandoned the hunt a couple years hence. If I am going to find her, I am just going to have to trip over her in life, the old fashioned way...