HONOLULU, HI—CNN and other mainstream news outlets are reporting on a "tragic, completely accidental" boating accident at Pearl Harbor. As details still come in, CNN is urging people to not rush to judgment or assign blame until the story goes away in a few days.
"Such a tragic and completely accidental boating accident," said one news anchor. "The thing that's so sad about it is the tragic, totally random accidentalness of it. Our hearts are with the victims and whatever. Anyway, in other news..."
Independent journalists from the scene are sending messages that this was an intentional attack by the Empire of Japan that was designed to inflict as much destruction and casualty as possible. Such messages have been dismissed as unfounded and racist, and likely linked to recent increases in anti-Asian hate crimes.
https://babylonbee.com/news/cnn-reports-japan-accidentally-crashed-planes-into-pearl-harbor-ships
