10 Most Common Cycling Style Faux Pas

[Wingnut]

I'm compiling and writing bicycling themed posts and will be posting them here.  If you are interested in cycling and would like a "mention" when I post a new piece let me know and I get you on the list:

Wing


1. Arm Warmers With a Sleeveless Jersey
Fix: Yes, Allen Iverson popularized this look. The key here? Remember that you’ll never be an NBA all-star and reserve the arm warmers for only when you’re donning a sleeved jersey.

2.  Lopsided Jersey
Fix: Evenly distribute your necessities in the jersey pockets by weight rather than bulk. This pattern is best: if you don’t have much stuff, use the center pocket. More stuff, use the two outer pockets. Lots of stuff, use all three.

3.  Fix: Remember this rule—tuck in only when you’re wearing a belt. Fanny packs don’t count, though if you’re wearing one, nothing you do with your jersey can make you look any worse.

4. Exposed Skin Between Shorts and Jersey When You Bend at the Waist
This is the biking equivalent to the butt crack.  Fix: Wear a longer jersey or one with rubber grippers at the waist—or wear bibs.

5.  Seatbag Swings And Bounces As You Ride
Fix: When it comes to rear ends, you want your bike to be more like Alberto Contador than Jan Ullrich. Keep it light—and cinch it tight.

6.  4-6 Inches of Excess Helmet Strap Dangling Below Your Chin
Fix: After you properly adjust your helmet for fit, cut the strap so only 2 inches protrude from the buckle. (The extra lets you loosen the strap to accommodate a winter hat.) Singe the cut with a match, or glue the ends, to keep the fabric from unraveling.

7.  Salt Stained Helmet Straps
When you clean your bike, rinse the helmet straps under the faucet or dunk them into the bucket of soapy water (before you attack the drivetrain).

8.  Panty Lines/Underwear Beneath Cycling Shorts
Fix: Do a hundred-miler with your skivvies on, then contemplate the swamp that is your crotch. Now you know—and will never forget—why nothing comes between chamois and skin.

9.  Shorts So Well Worn They Are See Through In Spots
Fix: Just buy new ones—or ride past the local elementary school until you’re arrested.

10.  Straps of Bib Shorts Over Jersey
Fix: Bib straps under your jersey, of course. If you like the external-strap method because it makes answering the call of nature easier, switch to a full-zip jersey, which you don’t have to pull over your head to slip off.

This article originally appeared in Bicycling.com

@anubias
@Cyber Liberty
@mystery-ak

[bolobaby]

I sort of hate cycling "fashion." It used to be that people could go out for a ride on their bikes in just t-shirts and shorts and get a good, sweaty workout.

Now everyone needs to look like they are part of the Tour de France even if they have a potbelly.

[Wingnut]

I sort of hate cycling "fashion." It used to be that people could go out for a ride on their bikes in just t-shirts and shorts and get a good, sweaty workout.

Now everyone needs to look like they are part of the Tour de France even if they have a potbelly.

Every sport has its uniform!  LOL   Lycra seems to be ours,  for better or worse.

I was talking to my neighbor who is a SUP freak and I made that same comment about how in the old days you'd hop on a surf board in a speedo banana hammock or some tight b-ballers and hang ten.  Today not so much.  got to wear the gear!   

[anubias]

I can no longer jump on a bike and ride very far without my bibs due to age.  Hamburger butt is not my thing.  ;)

[truth_seeker]

[anubias]

Gotta laugh. On my way to Valley View park trail head to ride around Whiterock Lake. Fanny is on fire due to trying Assos chamois cream while reading the thread. Feels like icey hot.  Think I'll forego in future.  I may have hamburger butt when I get back tonight anyway.

[Sanguine]

That's right, you're in California. 

Wow!

[Right_in_Virginia]

Here are all 10 rolled into one:

 

[truth_seeker]

That's right, you're in California. 

Wow!

@Sanguine

Just for you, "The Texan"

[Wingnut]

I can no longer jump on a bike and ride very far without my bibs due to age.  Hamburger butt is not my thing.  ;)

In my younger days I wore chamois shorts or a chamois liner with reg baggies.  Now I'm solely a bibber.  It helps hold everything in place!  Thant and they don't roll down! :) 

My wife has several drop tail Pearl Izumi bibs for days when we ride long distance.  If you don't have a pair you might look into them.  Better then having to strip buck nekkid to pee!

@anubias

[Wingnut]

Here are all 10 rolled into one:

That and a whole subsection of fail on top of it!   

[Wingnut]

Gotta laugh. On my way to Valley View park trail head to ride around Whiterock Lake. Fanny is on fire due to trying Assos chamois cream while reading the thread. Feels like icey hot.  Think I'll forego in future.  I may have hamburger butt when I get back tonight anyway.

I shy away from all the euro butt creams.  You might as well slather on some Mentholatum deep heating rub!  LOL   I use Paceline Chamios Butt'r.  Works great!

@anubias

[truth_seeker]

Not a sport for weaklings and crybabies.

Circuit Français Peugeot (Tour de France des Indépendants) 1911, 3 settembre. Léon Vallotton (1885-1956), a destra, terzo della classifica finale e Alfons Lauwers (1885-1964)

[Wingnut]

Not a sport for weaklings and crybabies.

Circuit Français Peugeot (Tour de France des Indépendants) 1911, 3 settembre. Léon Vallotton (1885-1956), a destra, terzo della classifica finale e Alfons Lauwers (1885-1964)

No it is not!

105-Year-Old Cyclist Rides 14 Miles In An Hour En Route To A World Record

"Marchand, a former firefighter who was born in 1911 in the northern town of Amiens, has lived through two world wars. He led an eventful life that took him to Venezuela, where he worked as a truck driver near the end of the 1940s. He then moved to Canada and became a lumberjack for a while.
"Back in France in the 1960s, Marchand made a living through various jobs that left him with no time to practice sports.
"He finally took up his bike again when he was 68 years old and began a series of cycling feats.
"The diminutive Marchand — he is 1.52 meters (5-foot) tall and weighs 52 kilograms (115 pounds) — rode from Bordeaux to Paris, and Paris to Roubaix several times. He also cycled to Moscow from Paris in 1992.
"Ten years later, he set the record for someone over the age of 100 riding 100 kilometers (62 miles)."

[Sanguine]

@Sanguine

Just for you, "The Texan"

 

[anubias]

I shy away from all the euro butt creams.  You might as well slather on some Mentholatum deep heating rub!  LOL   I use Paceline Chamios Butt'r.  Works great!

@anubias

Thanks for the tip. No hamburger butt, but it made for an interesting ride.

[TomSea]

Don't walk it uphill.



Unless you really have to.



Surprising to see this with mountain bikes, I'd climb this one little hill; you feel it in your chest, I don't know if I'd get too tricky nowadays.



Never let WD-40 get near the wheel rims if you use traditional caliper brakes, nowadays, people are riding a lot of modern bikes, disc brakes, carbon.

This must be where the Freds hangout, I'm sure Wingnut knows what that is. Do others? I won't spoil the fun and say what that is.

Don't swallow bugs but you probably can't help it.

[anubias]

In my younger days I wore chamois shorts or a chamois liner with reg baggies.  Now I'm solely a bibber.  It helps hold everything in place!  Thant and they don't roll down! :) 

My wife has several drop tail Pearl Izumi bibs for days when we ride long distance.  If you don't have a pair you might look into them.  Better then having to strip buck nekkid to pee!

@anubias

I was interested in the drop tails but read horror stories of them dropping while riding. Scared me off of them.

I have a few pair of ladies Assos that buckle in the front that make peeing possible without stripping.  Not perfect but they'll do for now.

I take it that your better half hasn't had a problem with untimely dropping? 

[TomSea]

At the thrift store a few years ago, I found some "authentic chamois", genuine leather cycling shorts. I find the modern chamois probably just as comfortable. Those others are good too and how it use to be. You can probably find genuine still.

[anubias]

@Wingnut  Will there be a sticky folder to make the threads easy to find?

[Wingnut]

Never let WD-40 get near the wheel rims if you use traditional caliper brakes, nowadays, people are riding a lot of modern bikes, disc brakes, carbon.

This must be where the Freds hangout, I'm sure Wingnut knows what that is. Do others? I won't spoil the fun and say what that is.

Good lord yes Tom.  Never ever use WD-40 on any part of your bike.  It is a solvent and attracts dirt and grit.


FYI!  https://biskey7.wordpress.com/2011/04/02/bicycling-are-you-a-fred/

[Wingnut]

I was interested in the drop tails but read horror stories of them dropping while riding. Scared me off of them.

I have a few pair of ladies Assos that buckle in the front that make peeing possible without stripping.  Not perfect but they'll do for now.

I take it that your better half hasn't had a problem with untimely dropping?

No...not that I have heard of.  And trust me, oh I would have heard!

I never heard of the Assos so I searched and found this at Velo on the subject.

Clothesline: Two women’s drop-tail bibs put to the test
http://www.velonews.com/2012/10/mtb/clothesline-two-womens-drop-tail-bibs-put-to-the-test_261707

[anubias]

Thanks for the link.  I researched them all and could not make up my mind.  LOL  Every time I would decide on one, I'd find where somebody said they sucked.  I gave up.

Where is the bike forum?  I wanted to make a post, but could not find it to do so?  It took me fifteen minutes to find this thread to ask.

@Wingnut

[Wingnut]

Thanks for the link.  I researched them all and could not make up my mind.  LOL  Every time I would decide on one, I'd find where somebody said they sucked.  I gave up.

Where is the bike forum?  I wanted to make a post, but could not find it to do so?  It took me fifteen minutes to find this thread to ask.

@Wingnut

@anubias   Well, there is no forum.  I just put that in my title to be funny.   Sorry

[skeeter]

My seatbag is exactly why I don't ride a bike.