Author Topic: After His Honeymoon, Ted Cruz Immediately Bought 100 Cans Of Soup  (Read 939 times)

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Offline sinkspur

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http://gawker.com/after-his-honeymoon-ted-cruz-immediately-bought-100-ca-1770893594

After His Honeymoon, Ted Cruz Immediately Bought 100 Cans Of Soup

Ashley Feinberg
April 14, 2016


Thanks to CNN’s town hall, America just got another glimpse into the waking hell that is Heidi Cruz’s daily life. Tonight’s entry into the Heidi Cruz catalogue of the macabre: A newlywed Ted Cruz celebrates by buying 100 cans of Campbell’s Chunky soup.

 
The story defies any logical, human explanation, so I’ll let Heidi do the talking:

"When I married Ted, we got back from our honeymoon, and he went off to the store and came home by himself. And I was completely shocked to see that he arrived back at our apartment with literally 100 cans of Campbell’s Chunky soup. I never bought 100 of anything.

This was shocking to me, so we had a tough conversation about it. I said, “You don’t buy 100 of anything, much less canned soup. We can’t do this. I’ll be making things.” He said, “No, I know you. you won’t be making things.”

So the next morning, it was a weekend morning, I loaded up our car before he woke up and returned every single can. And when I got home, I called my mother just to make sure I’d done the right thing as a newlywed. And she emphatically disagreed with me. And so when Ted opened the pantry, I had to quickly tell him that I would go back and buy those cans again."

Questions abound.

First and foremost—why? What did this “tough conversation” consist of? Did Heidi really go back to the store to re-buy 100 cans of soup? Did she re-buy the soup in the same variety and quantity? How long does it take Ted to finish 100 cans of soup? Heidi, are you okay? You know you can tell us if you’re not okay? Also—why?

We’ve reached out to Campbell’s and also deep within ourselves for comment, and will update if and when we hear back.

Until then, if you have any information at all about what Ted Cruz did with 100 cans of Campbell’s Chunky™ soup, please do let us know.
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A-Lert

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Re: After His Honeymoon, Ted Cruz Immediately Bought 100 Cans Of Soup
« Reply #1 on: April 14, 2016, 07:09:25 pm »
The interview actually helped to make Cruz look human.

Offline sinkspur

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Re: After His Honeymoon, Ted Cruz Immediately Bought 100 Cans Of Soup
« Reply #2 on: April 14, 2016, 07:10:35 pm »
Who eats soup out of a can?  That crap is full of sodium and is horrible for you.
« Last Edit: April 14, 2016, 07:15:30 pm by sinkspur »
Roy Moore's "spiritual warfare" is driving past a junior high without stopping.

Online Millee

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Re: After His Honeymoon, Ted Cruz Immediately Bought 100 Cans Of Soup
« Reply #3 on: April 14, 2016, 07:14:06 pm »
Well, he's obviously not fit to be President, he bought canned soup. 

Offline Relic

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Re: After His Honeymoon, Ted Cruz Immediately Bought 100 Cans Of Soup
« Reply #4 on: April 14, 2016, 07:15:23 pm »
I don't think there's a sane person in all of the political class.

Wingnut

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Re: After His Honeymoon, Ted Cruz Immediately Bought 100 Cans Of Soup
« Reply #5 on: April 14, 2016, 07:15:33 pm »
Who eats soup out of a can?  That crap is full of sodium and his horrible for you.


A-Lert

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Re: After His Honeymoon, Ted Cruz Immediately Bought 100 Cans Of Soup
« Reply #6 on: April 14, 2016, 07:18:07 pm »
Who eats soup out of a can?  That crap is full of sodium and is horrible for you.

Millions of people everyday. There are low sodium alternatives if you would care to look.

Bill Cipher

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Re: After His Honeymoon, Ted Cruz Immediately Bought 100 Cans Of Soup
« Reply #7 on: April 14, 2016, 07:27:44 pm »
Wow.  Ok.  Cruz is definitely unfit for office.

Online Weird Tolkienish Figure

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Re: After His Honeymoon, Ted Cruz Immediately Bought 100 Cans Of Soup
« Reply #8 on: April 14, 2016, 07:38:24 pm »
Who eats soup out of a can?  That crap is full of sodium and is horrible for you.

Everything is bad for you.

Offline AnybodyButaDem

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Re: After His Honeymoon, Ted Cruz Immediately Bought 100 Cans Of Soup
« Reply #9 on: April 14, 2016, 07:41:15 pm »
Who eats soup out of a can?  That crap is full of sodium and is horrible for you.

Who eats pizza with a fork?  Just as stupid a criticism.

Guess who got the NYT's endorsement in the GOP primary?

Online Weird Tolkienish Figure

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Re: After His Honeymoon, Ted Cruz Immediately Bought 100 Cans Of Soup
« Reply #10 on: April 14, 2016, 07:42:21 pm »
Who eats pizza with a fork?  Just as stupid a criticism.



Trump ate pizza with a fork, I'd have to Google for the incident. Happened like 10 years ago.

Offline AnybodyButaDem

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Re: After His Honeymoon, Ted Cruz Immediately Bought 100 Cans Of Soup
« Reply #11 on: April 14, 2016, 07:42:57 pm »
Trump ate pizza with a fork, I'd have to Google for the incident. Happened like 10 years ago.

"Just as stupid a criticism"

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Offline Jackson

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Re: After His Honeymoon, Ted Cruz Immediately Bought 100 Cans Of Soup
« Reply #12 on: April 14, 2016, 07:45:35 pm »
Who eats soup out of a can?  That crap is full of sodium and is horrible for you.

Man, I LOVE sodium. I always ADD sodium to my food, especially to my soups, although Campbell's usually require a bit less to get the taste right.

And something must be right or I wouldn't be pushing 97 with all my own teeth and hearing that tests out an an 18 year old level.

Wingnut

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Re: After His Honeymoon, Ted Cruz Immediately Bought 100 Cans Of Soup
« Reply #13 on: April 14, 2016, 07:54:18 pm »
Man, I LOVE sodium. I always ADD sodium to my food, especially to my soups, although Campbell's usually require a bit less to get the taste right.

And something must be right or I wouldn't be pushing 97 with all my own teeth and hearing that tests out an an 18 year old level.

I bet if you knew you were going to live this long you would have take better care of yourself!   :beer:

Online Weird Tolkienish Figure

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Re: After His Honeymoon, Ted Cruz Immediately Bought 100 Cans Of Soup
« Reply #14 on: April 14, 2016, 07:59:37 pm »
Sodium is a necessary nutrient, helps with your body's electrical system.

A-Lert

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Re: After His Honeymoon, Ted Cruz Immediately Bought 100 Cans Of Soup
« Reply #15 on: April 14, 2016, 08:08:17 pm »
I eat a lot of canned soup.  You are correct about the sodium.  But I don't eat many other things with lots of sodium.  I do buy lower sodium brands.  I eat very little fast food.  So, eh.  I like canned soup.  The only thing that ruins it for me is when I remember a story my father-in-law told about visiting a canning facility and seeing rodents.

The other dark meat!

Online mystery-ak

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Re: After His Honeymoon, Ted Cruz Immediately Bought 100 Cans Of Soup
« Reply #16 on: April 14, 2016, 08:09:14 pm »
Sorry sink..this has got to be one of the stupidest articles ever posted here :shrug:
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Offline Frank Cannon

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Re: After His Honeymoon, Ted Cruz Immediately Bought 100 Cans Of Soup
« Reply #17 on: April 14, 2016, 08:16:56 pm »
Man, I LOVE sodium. I always ADD sodium to my food, especially to my soups, although Campbell's usually require a bit less to get the taste right.

And something must be right or I wouldn't be pushing 97 with all my own teeth and hearing that tests out an an 18 year old level.

Good for you. I not only add sodium to my homemade soups, I also add the dreaded MSG.

BTW, welcome aboard.

A-Lert

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Re: After His Honeymoon, Ted Cruz Immediately Bought 100 Cans Of Soup
« Reply #18 on: April 14, 2016, 08:19:49 pm »
Sorry sink..this has got to be one of the stupidest articles ever posted here :shrug:

Some people have a penchant for those stories. Many of us who didn't come from wealthy families had to work our way through college. I pretty much lived on canned soup warmed in a popcorn popper.

A-Lert

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Re: After His Honeymoon, Ted Cruz Immediately Bought 100 Cans Of Soup
« Reply #19 on: April 14, 2016, 08:22:09 pm »
Man, I LOVE sodium. I always ADD sodium to my food, especially to my soups, although Campbell's usually require a bit less to get the taste right.

And something must be right or I wouldn't be pushing 97 with all my own teeth and hearing that tests out an an 18 year old level.

Tell me you smoke Camel straights and drink Old Crow bourbon!

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Re: After His Honeymoon, Ted Cruz Immediately Bought 100 Cans Of Soup
« Reply #20 on: April 14, 2016, 08:27:42 pm »
Man, I LOVE sodium. I always ADD sodium to my food, especially to my soups, although Campbell's usually require a bit less to get the taste right.

And something must be right or I wouldn't be pushing 97 with all my own teeth and hearing that tests out an an 18 year old level.

97..really?
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Re: After His Honeymoon, Ted Cruz Immediately Bought 100 Cans Of Soup
« Reply #21 on: April 14, 2016, 08:27:58 pm »
Sorry sink..this has got to be one of the stupidest articles ever posted here :shrug:

Lets not set the bar too high. It is going to be a long hot summer!   :pondering:

Online Weird Tolkienish Figure

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Re: After His Honeymoon, Ted Cruz Immediately Bought 100 Cans Of Soup
« Reply #22 on: April 14, 2016, 08:30:59 pm »
NOt quite as dumb as the Marco Rubio likes water scandal of 2015.

http://www.politico.com/story/2015/12/marco-rubio-love-water-216441

There you go. An entire article dedicated to how Rubio likes water. No joke.

Offline jmyrlefuller

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Re: After His Honeymoon, Ted Cruz Immediately Bought 100 Cans Of Soup
« Reply #23 on: April 14, 2016, 08:41:22 pm »
Who eats soup out of a can?  That crap is full of sodium and is horrible for you.
I do, but I also drain the broth first, which takes out a lot of the sodium.
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Offline Frank Cannon

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Re: After His Honeymoon, Ted Cruz Immediately Bought 100 Cans Of Soup
« Reply #24 on: April 14, 2016, 08:46:20 pm »
I do, but I also drain the broth first, which takes out a lot of the sodium.

Doesn't that make it the opposite of soup?