Today's Toons 3/9/26

[pookie18]

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In Case You Missed It Dept.:

The Israeli air attack on Iran Saturday killed the Ayatollah and 40 leaders. It decapitated the regime and Iran's line of succession was wiped out all the way back to the Colonial era, until they are now pretty much down to Prince Andrew. The difference is, the Ayatollah is satisfied with 72 virgins.

The U.S.-Israeli war with Iran began Friday with a CIA-directed air strike that killed Iran's Supreme Leader the Ayatollah Ali Khamenei. U.S. air strikes are what pass for term limits in the Middle East. The Ayatollah's family asks that in lieu of flowers, that you simply die, you filthy infidels.

The Pentagon assured the people in Iran Monday that all precautions are being taken to try to avoid civilian casualties. The U.S. air attacks on Iran have to be exhausting all the senior citizens at their Bingo parlors. Every time the emcee draws a ball and shouts B-52 everybody jumps under the table.

Olympic hockey star Jack Hughes returned to play for the New Jersey Devils, prompting a huge interest in the NHL. I don't know much about hockey, but I plan to follow Nashville's team. Every day there is a new story about one of the Predators being interviewed by the House Oversight Committee.

Bill Clinton faced a long day in front of the House Oversight Committee Friday. He had to answer for all the lurid photos in the Epstein files and the flights he took on the pedophile's jet, The Lolita Express. Bill is just lucky Hillary didn't volunteer to stick around and help with the questioning.

Hillary Clinton testified in a deposition to the House Oversight Committee Thursday and denied any connection to Epstein. In the past, Hillary has said that Bill Clinton only flew on Epstein's airplane to raise funds for Charity. However she has yet to comment on Destiny, Serenity or Harmony.

President Trump was reported considering an emergency executive order requiring photo IDs in order to vote in the fall federal elections. He'd do it to get around Congress. Last week they held a test vote in the Senate on the Voter ID bill and the bill lost by a vote of six million to fifty-one.

President Trump vowed to use other tariffs at his disposal after the Supreme Court struck down the emergency tariff he's used. The music industry gave Trump the idea on bow to get around the decision, It occurred to Trump after watching the Grammy Awards that no tariff is illegal on stolen land.

US News and World Report published a Gallup Poll which found that American optimism is at its lowest point in decades, with only 62% of Americans happy with their lives. But I think that's about to change. We will soon be able to vacation in Cuba, Venezuela, Iran and maybe even Minnesota.

The National Football League just ended a record-breaking month in the number of coaching changes with ten teams firing and then hiring new head coaches. They can never seem to stay in one place for a long time. Bill Belichick is leaving North Carolina to become the next Ayatollah of Iran.

Congratulations to Iran's new supreme leader Majtaba Khamenei on getting the top job. If I were you, son, I wouldn't screw around wasting time making plans for the weekend.

President Trump agreed to be roasted at the White House Correspondents Dinner. Trump has survived three assassination attempts by Americans and two by Iran, so he feels ready for any comedian. No one has trained to take shots like this since David Copperfield stopped catching bullets with his teeth.

Marco Rubio briefed Congressional leaders on Iran Monday but Democrats refused to comply. The change of seasons can be demoralizing. House Democrats can't believe it's already Trump Is Going to Start World War 3 season already, they still have their Trump Slept with Underage Girls decorations up.

President Trump posted daily videos keeping Americans informed about the war on Iran. He keeps the public involved in his thinking, in a reality show way. If the missile attack on the Ayatollah proved anything, it's that Trump has come a long way from simply telling contestants that they're fired.

President Trump told reporters after the initial attacks on Iran Monday that U.S. combat troops may be needed. Why stop at Iran? Next Trump needs to rescue England before the London grooming gangs overthrow Charles and install Andrew as the King and underage girls become the law of the land.

The Wall Street Journal cited the Gallup Poll which said the percentage of Americans who are confident in our country's future has declined to 62%. I think we've come a long way. Just a year ago, Venezuelans and Iranians were burning American flags and now, that only happens in Minneapolis.

Jim Carrey cited his French roots accepting France's highest movie award Friday. Much like the French veneration of Jerry Lewis, they adore Jim for his physical comedy genius. In the art of hilarious pratfalls, the French rank Jim Carrey just ahead of Jerry Lewis and just behind Joe Biden.

Teheran street demonstrations celebrating the Ayatollah's death began breaking out in the streets of Iran's capital city. Just this week, a jubilant crowd in Teheran tore down a huge statue of the slain Ayatollah. The statue will be shipped across the Atlantic and put back up in Harvard Yard.

Democratic House leader Hakeem Jeffries predicted the U.S. action in Iran will end in failure. Democratic Senate Leader Chuck Schumer called it an illegal action under the War Powers Act. Last night, four Democrats killed each other at the bridge table because they all wanted to play No Trump.

The House Oversight Committee released the video of Bill Clinton's testimony over his photos in the Epstein files. Bill denied knowing Epstein trafficked underage women. The photos show that as Clinton aged, he developed an attraction for women with young bodies and black boxes over their heads.

The military campaign against Iran is called Epic Fury. When I first saw the caption, I thought it was Hillary's reaction to Bill enjoying the photos in the Epstein files during his testimony Friday.

In Rome, smoke comes out of a building and there's a new pope. In Iran, smoke comes of a building and there's one less Ayatollah.

DHS Secretary nominee Mark Wayne Mullen is an enrolled member of the Cherokee Nation tribe. Talk about long overdue. It's taken 400 years, but leave it to Trump to place an Indian in charge of deporting illegal immigrants.

I can't believe Iranians are in the street celebrating Trump tonight. It's like they don't even care or haven't even considered how this makes liberal white women feel.

After a year of living in England, Ellen Degeneris is back living in the US, which is the real reason Kristi Noem got fired.

I guess it's no surprise if your country's entire leadership gets blown up if they're all Boomers.

It appears that Iran won the coin toss and elected to receive.

-- Argus Hamilton



(Thank you, Vulcan)

[Jimino]

  Ciao Pookie, thanks for the toons!

[pookie18]

Ciao Pookie, thanks for the toons!

Mornin' & you're welcome, Jimino!

[Polly Ticks]

Thanks, Pookie.  I was worried there for a minute that I was going to have start a Monday without any 'toons, and that was too scary to contemplate.  I'm glad the site decided to cooperate with you.   

[pookie18]

Thanks, Pookie.  I was worried there for a minute that I was going to have start a Monday without any 'toons, and that was too scary to contemplate.  I'm glad the site decided to cooperate with you.   

My pleasure, Polly Ticks! I tried posting it for over an hour b4 I finally got in. The site seems to be having problems recently. I also e-mail the thread link to various people & got 2 e-mails back saying that they couldn't get in (& that was after I posted the thread :-)

[Polly Ticks]

My pleasure, Polly Ticks! I tried posting it for over an hour b4 I finally got in. The site seems to be having problems recently. I also e-mail the thread link to various people & got 2 e-mails back saying that they couldn't get in (& that was after I posted the thread :-)

Yes, it has been very up and down for the past several days. When I finally saw your post, the next most recent activity was from 4 hours earlier, so it definitely was a site-wide problem.  In any case, thank you for your persistence!