Author Topic: SEMI-NEWS/SEMI-SATIRE: March 8, 2026 Edition  (Read 43 times)

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Offline John Semmens

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SEMI-NEWS/SEMI-SATIRE: March 8, 2026 Edition
« on: Today at 03:11:33 am »
Leftists Condemn US/Israeli Attack on Iran

Sensing that the combined US/Israeli attack on Iran presented him with an opportunity to boost his foreign policy credentials heading into to anticipated run for president in 2028, Gov. Gavin Newsom (D-Calif) asserted "the corrupt and repressive Iranian regime must never have nuclear weapons. The leadership of Iran must go. But that does not justify the President of the United States engaging in an illegal, dangerous war that will risk the lives of our American service members and our friends. President Trump is putting Americans at risk abroad because he is unpopular at home."

Sen. Mark Kelly (D-AZ) said "the Iranian people deserve freedom. They deserve the right to choose their own leaders. What Trump is doing isn't the right way to get the job done. When President Bush launched Operation Desert Storm 35 years ago, I understood the mission and the end goal: eliminate Iraq's weapons of mass destruction. So did Congress. So did the American people. As it turned out, there were no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq. Trump called that war a failure, but I consider it a success because I disagree with everything Trump says."

Mayor Zohran Mamdani (D-NYC) slammed President Trump's strikes on Iran as an "illegal war of aggression. Bombing cities, killing civilians, killing Supreme Leader Ayatollah Ali Khamenei is just wrong. Trump claims that he is retaliating against Iran because it has been funding terrorists who kill civilians. These so-called terrorists are simply carrying out the Quran's command to kill Jews and other non-believers. In short, the Ayatollah was acting in good faith. Trump is not. He is opposing Allah's will."

Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-NY) echoed Mamdani's remarks, saying "Trump's decision to start a war with Iran is a grave violation of the Constitution and Congressional War Powers Act. It is absolutely and clearly grounds for impeachment. Iran poses no immediate threat to the US or the world. It is the United States that does pose such a threat."

Former Vice-President Kamala Harris (D) said "Trump's attempt to topple the brutal and oppressive Iranian regime is dangerous and unnecessary. It's not something that I would have done if I had been elected instead of Trump. Iran is not our country. It is another and completely separate country in some other part of the world. It is entitled under international law to oppress and kill its own inhabitants. Every country has this same right. It was this knowledge that helped guide the policies of the Biden-Harris Administration for the four years I was vice-president and would still be in effect if I was president now."

French President Emmanuel Macron called President Trump's attack on Iran "dangerous. It must stop. The Iranian regime must understand that it now has no other option but to engage in good faith negotiations to end its nuclear and ballistic programs, as well as its regional destabilization activities. I don't know how we can make them do this. Perhaps they would obey a command from the UN to stop fighting. Somehow, someway we've got to end this fighting. Maybe France needs to set an example that the rest of the world can emulate by simply surrendering to either Iran or the United States or whoever wants to accept it."

China commended Macron "for his enlightened pacifism. We enthusiastically accept France's offer of surrender to China. The world would be more peaceful if every nation surrendered to China. With the whole world consolidated under Chinese authority there would be no need for anymore wars. Everyone would be marching in step toward a glorious unified future of collectivist warmth."

US Secretary of War Pete Hegseth argued that "Iran has been at war with the world since 1979. They have sent terrorists wherever and whenever they pleased to massacre people who refuse to submit to Islam. This is an intolerable threat that has grown more serious as their hateful Regime attempts to develop nuclear weapons and the missiles to deliver them to whatever targets the Ayatollah chooses. Iran has been very vocal in promising 'death to America' and 'death to Israel.' It would be insane for the civilized nations of the world to continue to ignore this malicious threat. It would be more reassuring if these nations would assist us in the fight against those who want to kill us, but we can't allow ourselves to be diverted from the action necessary to neutralize this threat while waiting for these other countries to do their share of the fighting."


 

Millions of Dollars of Fraud in Federal Autism Payments

It turns out that in addition to fraudulent payments of federal aid in Minnesota meant for feeding children and providing daycare to children of working parents it has been revealed that fraudulent payments for autism therapy must now be added to the list. In testimony given in Congress it was pointed out to Gov. Tim Walz, that in 2017 about $1 million in federal funds was paid to help fight autism. In 2024, $343 million was paid. Walz admitted being totally ignorant and unembarrassed by this revelation, saying "I'm not a financial genius. I am only a governor. I can't be expected to pay attention to what's happening with all the federal aid being sent to our state. Besides, practically every state is infested with fraud. It's unfair to try to single out Minnesota for abuses that are the norm nationwide."

Meanwhile in Colorado, auditors discovered that in a sample of 100 of the state's Medicaid claims for autism treatments 100% were found to be either improper or flawed. In 93 of the 100 cases, the providers either did not verify that the therapy took place, didn't provide the required signatures, or billed for more expenses than were justified. In 18 of the 100 the therapy was performed by staff without proper qualifications. In 88 cases, the state was billed for recreational activities not part of recognized therapy. Some staff members of providers had criminal convictions for weapons offenses, assault, or DUI. Audits in four states revealed that hundreds of millions of dollars in improper payments have been made.

The US Inspector General for the Department of Health and Human Services recommended that Colorado refund $42.6 million to the federal government. Colorado agreed to improve in the future, but disagreed with the recommendation to refund the money, saying that "our Medicaid program does not require certification of therapists or verification of expenses before making payments."

Bi-Partisan Opposition to Revealing Sexual Misconduct

Rep. Nancy Mace's (R-SC) motion "to publicly release all reports on investigations into members of Congress regarding allegations of 'sexual harassment or of a sexual relationship with a member of their staff" was voted down by 357 to 65 vote.

Mace said "the professed concern for the victims being publicly humiliated 'phony.' Any Member who votes against this resolution is voting to protect the cover-up instead of the victims. Nobody in Congress should get to play by a different set of rules. We need to shine a light on every single case the House Ethics Committee has been sitting on."

Committee Chairman Michael Guest (R-Miss) disagreed with Mace, saying "perpetrators of sexual misconduct should never be shielded from responsibility for their misdeeds. However, victims may be retraumatized by public disclosures of an interim work product, excerpts of interview transcripts, and certain exhibits. Witnesses, who often only speak to the Committee confidentially or on condition of future anonymity, could fear retaliation if their cooperation is made public. We were ready to open an investigation of Rep. Gonzales (R-Tx), but the suicide of his alleged victim and his withdrawal from the election have rendered his case moot."