Author Topic: Humor/Jokes (Read 72367 times)

Cyber Liberty · « **Reply #100 on:** July 01, 2021, 11:41:21 am »

Smokin Joe · « **Reply #101 on:** July 01, 2021, 02:52:57 pm »

Quote from: DCPatriot on July 01, 2021, 11:25:32 am

Nancy Pelosi was visiting a primary school in Tampa and visited a grade four class. They were in the middle of a discussion related to words and their meanings.

The teacher asked Mrs. Pelosi if she would like to lead the discussion on the word 'tragedy.' So our illustrious Democrat asked the class for an example of a 'tragedy'.

One little boy stood up and offered: "If my best friend, who lives on a farm, is playing in the field and a tractor runs him over and kills him, that would be a tragedy."

"No," said Pelosi , "that would be an accident."

A little girl raised her hand: "If a school bus carrying 50 children drove off a cliff, killing everyone, that would be a tragedy."
"I'm afraid not," explained Pelosi .
"That's what we would call great loss."

The room went silent. No other child volunteered. Pelosi searched the room.
"Isn't there someone here who can give me an example of a tragedy?"

Finally at the back of the room, Little Johnny raised his hand. The teacher held her breath.

In a quiet voice he said: "If the plane carrying you was struck by a 'friendly fire' missile and blown to smithereens that would be a tragedy."
"Fantastic!" exclaimed Pelosi , "That's right. And can you tell me why that would be a tragedy?"

"Well," says Johnny, "It has to be a tragedy, because it sure as hell wouldn't be a great loss ... and you can bet your sweet ass it wouldn't be an accident either!" The teacher left the room

corbe · « **Reply #102 on:** July 01, 2021, 04:41:49 pm »

corbe · « **Reply #103 on:** July 01, 2021, 06:59:35 pm »

corbe · « **Reply #104 on:** July 01, 2021, 08:12:24 pm »

sneakypete · « **Reply #105 on:** July 01, 2021, 08:16:34 pm »

Quote from: corbe on July 01, 2021, 08:12:24 pm

@corbe

Smart move! Let us know how it works out for you,ok?

Smokin Joe · « **Reply #106 on:** July 02, 2021, 05:18:42 am »

Quote from: corbe on July 01, 2021, 08:12:24 pm

Hide the knives...

Gefn · « **Reply #107 on:** July 03, 2021, 07:13:38 am »

Quote from: Smokin Joe on July 02, 2021, 05:18:42 am

Hide the knives...

There was once a TV show called “Wives with Knives”
That’s how hubbies would meet their ends

Lando Lincoln · « **Reply #108 on:** July 03, 2021, 09:06:04 am »

From the real world...

(Plover) Wisconsin water tower repainted with embarrassing typo

corbe · « **Reply #109 on:** July 05, 2021, 03:27:59 pm »

sneakypete · « **Reply #110 on:** July 05, 2021, 03:31:30 pm »

Quote from: corbe on July 05, 2021, 03:27:59 pm

@corbe

I gotta admit,that one actually had me laughing!

corbe · « **Reply #111 on:** July 05, 2021, 04:32:23 pm »

libertybele · « **Reply #112 on:** July 05, 2021, 05:27:12 pm »

Quote from: corbe on July 01, 2021, 08:12:24 pm

corbe · « **Reply #113 on:** July 07, 2021, 12:47:51 pm »

corbe · « **Reply #114 on:** July 07, 2021, 12:52:43 pm »

sneakypete · « **Reply #115 on:** July 07, 2021, 01:35:06 pm »

Quote from: corbe on July 07, 2021, 12:52:43 pm

@corbe

Yah got me again! I may have to stop visiting this thread if my breath gets any shorter. Laughing takes too much out of me.

corbe · « **Reply #116 on:** July 07, 2021, 04:03:12 pm »

corbe · « **Reply #117 on:** July 08, 2021, 01:19:04 pm »

corbe · « **Reply #118 on:** July 08, 2021, 01:27:26 pm »

corbe · « **Reply #119 on:** July 08, 2021, 04:30:27 pm »

corbe · « **Reply #120 on:** July 08, 2021, 04:41:18 pm »

https://youtu.be/HObSl1xeD3s

corbe · « **Reply #121 on:** July 08, 2021, 05:24:24 pm »

sneakypete · « **Reply #122 on:** July 08, 2021, 05:26:37 pm »

Quote from: corbe on July 08, 2021, 01:27:26 pm

@corbe

LOL!

Where do you get all this stuff from?

Kamaji · « **Reply #123 on:** July 08, 2021, 05:31:51 pm »

Quote from: corbe on July 08, 2021, 05:24:24 pm

@corbe

All it needs are gills,and the picture is complete.

corbe · « **Reply #124 on:** July 08, 2021, 05:42:21 pm »

Quote from: sneakypete on July 08, 2021, 05:26:37 pm

@corbe

LOL!

Where do you get all this stuff from?

Mainly from Al Gores' Internet.
9GaG and The New Americanist are my primary sources and they are very addictive, just like TBR.

https://9gag.com/

https://thenewamericanist.com/

@sneakypete

sneakypete · « **Reply #125 on:** July 08, 2021, 05:44:21 pm »

Quote from: corbe on July 08, 2021, 05:42:21 pm

Mainly from Al Gores' Internet.
9GaG and The New Americanist are my primary sources and they are very addictive, just like TBR.

https://9gag.com/

https://thenewamericanist.com/

@sneakypete

@corbe

Thanks for the warning. I can barely cope with the stuff I am supposed to be doing now to fall down a rabbit hole like that.

corbe · « **Reply #126 on:** July 08, 2021, 06:28:59 pm »

corbe · « **Reply #127 on:** July 08, 2021, 11:08:16 pm »

Smokin Joe · « **Reply #128 on:** July 09, 2021, 04:43:02 am »

Quote from: corbe on July 08, 2021, 01:27:26 pm

"People who write on bathroom walls...
Roll their ..."

corbe · « **Reply #129 on:** July 09, 2021, 11:46:28 pm »

corbe · « **Reply #130 on:** July 10, 2021, 12:16:15 am »

corbe · « **Reply #131 on:** July 10, 2021, 10:28:56 am »

corbe · « **Reply #132 on:** July 10, 2021, 07:07:46 pm »

corbe · « **Reply #133 on:** July 10, 2021, 11:27:50 pm »

corbe · « **Reply #134 on:** July 10, 2021, 11:58:25 pm »

corbe · « **Reply #135 on:** July 11, 2021, 12:04:59 am »

art.prout · « **Reply #136 on:** July 11, 2021, 12:13:50 am »

Hey, did you hear about the new Italian snow tires?

Dago, Wop, Wop, Wop...

sneakypete · « **Reply #137 on:** July 11, 2021, 11:54:31 am »

Quote from: corbe on July 10, 2021, 07:07:46 pm

@corbe

SIC 'EM,Al!

sneakypete · « **Reply #138 on:** July 11, 2021, 11:55:25 am »

Quote from: corbe on July 10, 2021, 11:27:50 pm

@corbe
LOL at that little overacheiver!

sneakypete · « **Reply #139 on:** July 11, 2021, 11:57:18 am »

Quote from: corbe on July 11, 2021, 12:04:59 am

@corbe

Extra points for the Steve Miller allusion.

art.prout · « **Reply #140 on:** July 11, 2021, 07:31:07 pm »

There was a group of Aggie science students that wanted to take a trip to the sun, but some UT students said that was impossible and that they would burn up along the way before they reached the sun.

The Aggies replied, "We're going to travel at night!"

----------------

You heard about the aggie pilot and his co-pilot that were flying across the Atlantic and discovered they were would not make it because they were running low on fuel. The aggie decided to lighten the load by jettisoning some fuel.

sneakypete · « **Reply #141 on:** July 12, 2021, 01:03:15 am »

Quote from: art.prout on July 11, 2021, 07:31:07 pm

There was a group of Aggie science students that wanted to take a trip to the sun, but some UT students said that was impossible and that they would burn up along the way before they reached the sun.

The Aggies replied, "We're going to travel at night!"

----------------

You heard about the aggie pilot and his co-pilot that were flying across the Atlantic and discovered they were would not make it because they were running low on fuel. The aggie decided to lighten the load by jettisoning some fuel.

@art.prout

Those Texans are clever rascals,ain't they?

DCPatriot · « **Reply #142 on:** July 12, 2021, 06:59:54 pm »

Cyber Liberty · « **Reply #143 on:** July 12, 2021, 07:28:05 pm »

Quote from: DCPatriot on July 12, 2021, 06:59:54 pm

"Animal" knows what's what.

corbe · « **Reply #144 on:** July 12, 2021, 08:40:06 pm »

DCPatriot · « **Reply #145 on:** July 12, 2021, 09:40:29 pm »

jmyrlefuller · « **Reply #146 on:** July 12, 2021, 10:35:46 pm »

Quote from: DCPatriot on July 12, 2021, 06:59:54 pm

You're just making up for the deficits of virgins like myself.

sneakypete · « **Reply #147 on:** July 14, 2021, 12:14:13 pm »

Ok,two questions.

1:Was this subject moved because I had figured out how to find it?

2: Why didn't the attachment show up on the preview? I just have wasted 15 minutes trying to load it and preview it,and then the damn thing shows up on the actual post.

corbe · « **Reply #148 on:** July 14, 2021, 01:21:00 pm »

The Sub Category Humor/Jokes was not moved. It is still in Category Members Only. Since the upgrade a few months ago some type of Images and obviously Attachments will not show up in Preview. My technique is always Preview and if it doesn't show Just post and look at it. You can always delete and/or try again with different settings.

I think this Thread (Humor/Jokes) should be stickied instead of the Silliness Thread, what do you think? @sneakypete

corbe · « **Reply #149 on:** July 14, 2021, 01:32:25 pm »