The Five Reasons Trump Is Going to Crush Biden
Kurt Schlichter
Posted: Aug 27, 2020 12:01 AM
As the smoke clears following Donald Trump’s re-election, revealing the shattered ruins of the Democrats’ hopes and dreams of implementing their own Lil’ Venezuela in the Land of the Free, all the smart blue check Twitter people will be rubbing their heads – sissy drinks make for the worst hangovers – and explaining, “Well, of course Biden lost. Duh. It was so obvious he would lose. Pass the Advil.â€
So, why not do the post-mortem before the mortem, you know, a pre-mortem of why the creepy old weirdo who lives in a basement lost?
1. Joe Biden Is Joe Biden
Joe Biden lost because he is a creepy old weirdo who lives in a basement. But there are so many more facets to his diamond of failure. Look at his performance during the primary. He won because he was the last loser standing. Did his hideous conjoined Kamala twin even reach Iowa? Several others didn’t and many pulled the cord right after. Grandpa Badfinger did not so much defeat the competition as wander blissfully through the artillery barrage, somehow emerging unscathed and hungry for his morning mush.
Just wait for the debate, if he actually debates…
No one is excited about Joe Biden. No one. Look around you. I’m in Los Angeles and I drove two hours today and saw…zero Biden signs. Sure, people with Biden signs do exist, but the people with a Biden sign are the same people who pay for their kale at Whole Foods with a check.
CARTOONS | AF Branco
View Cartoon
Also, and this is somewhat important, he is obviously and manifestly senile. I mean, he’s whacked out, fried, and utterly demented. Sure, he managed to read through his teleprompter speech without his dentures falling out of his lie-hole, but everyone knows the guy is gone, daddy, gone. You can’t put crazy Uncle Chester up to be POTUS and have people say, “Well, we taped over the wall sockets so he wouldn’t stick his gruel spoon in one again, but I guess we can roll the dice giving him the nuclear codes.â€
And he’s the wrong man at the wrong time. America hates the status quo, and it wants a change agent. Somehow, Trump has maneuvered himself into that role, while the only change Biden has anything to do with involves his Depends.
This dude is a stone loser.
more
https://townhall.com/columnists/kurtschlichter/2020/08/27/the-five-reasons-trump-is-going-to-crush-biden-n2575078
