Well, I would @anubias ... and we'd have a blast driving the likes of him to drink! 
I'm married with three grown daughters all two years apart. I have endured a full month of PMS in my house for an entire decade and came out the other side with a full head of my own hair.
There is absolutely nothing humanly possible you or anyone else could possibly do to drive me to drink.
I have endured what most mortal men barely escape with their sanity and livers intact, much less their own hair.
I'm impervious to any pressure of stupefying myself in order to cope.
But you might make your efforts of attempting it amusing.