Author Topic: How to go pumpkin picking like a Navy SEAL  (Read 692 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline Elderberry

  • TBR Contributor
  • *****
  • Posts: 19,204
How to go pumpkin picking like a Navy SEAL
« on: October 14, 2023, 04:10:49 pm »
Navy Times by Sarah Sicard 10/13/2023

https://www.navytimes.com/off-duty/military-culture/2023/10/13/how-to-go-pumpkin-picking-like-a-navy-seal/



In times of autumn and gourd-picking there is a special breed of warrior ready to answer our nation’s call: the Navy SEAL. As you prepare to enter the field of battle — also known as a pumpkin patch — with a mission to carve the best Jack o’lantern the porch has ever known, consider these tips from the silent professionals.

Get a good night’s sleep

You don’t want to be battle-weary while on the hunt for the perfect pumpkin. Stay frosty.

Practice combat breathing

Waft in the smell of the farm’s apple cider and cinnamon doughnuts for four seconds, then release for four seconds. This will give you strength, courage, and clarity for the mission ahead.

Watch your six

You never know if a stealthy family will sneak up from behind and snake the most desirable orange gourd. Deploy your spouse and kids to keep 360 degrees of eyes on the field. Even better, put the smallest child on your shoulders so you have a bird’s eye view, too.

Secure the perimeter

Do a full walk-through of the pumpkin patch. Survey each of its rows. You don’t want to miss out on the best squash by being too hasty. This process takes time and precision.

Visualize success

See the pumpkin, be the pumpkin, buy the pumpkin.

Offline Smokin Joe

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 61,049
  • I was a "conspiracy theorist". Now I'm just right.
Re: How to go pumpkin picking like a Navy SEAL
« Reply #1 on: October 15, 2023, 02:34:57 am »
How God must weep at humans' folly! Stand fast! God knows what he is doing!
Seventeen Techniques for Truth Suppression

Of all tyrannies, a tyranny sincerely exercised for the good of its victims may be the most oppressive. It would be better to live under robber barons than under omnipotent moral busybodies. The robber baron's cruelty may sometimes sleep, his cupidity may at some point be satiated; but those who torment us for our own good will torment us without end for they do so with the approval of their own conscience.

C S Lewis