Congress Members To Wear Barcodes So Lobbyists Can Scan Prices, Self-Checkouthttps://babylonbee.com/news/congress-members-to-wear-upc-codes-so-lobbyists-can-scan-prices-self-checkoutWASHINGTON, D.C.—In a move to make purchasing congresspeople easier and faster for lobbyists, Congress voted to approve a new measure that calls for congresspeople to wear barcodes on their foreheads so lobbyists, activists, and corporations can simply scan them and self-checkout.
Self-checkout machines will be installed at all exits of the Capitol Building, so once they've added congresspeople to their cart, lobbyists can pay right on the way out.
"Purchasing congresspeople used to be a time-consuming, expensive process," said a Planned Parenthood representative. ...
The Babylon Bee should know that buyable Congress Critters would
never be this honest.
