There have been some very amusing memes featuring Chuck "Badass" Norris that us guys find a few percent true and grossly exaggerated just for banter and smiles. Gentlemen, we would all like to think there's a little badass in all of us when the time is appropriate. So let's get down to it!
My large orange tree attracts rats and squirrels. The squirrels get in the tree, start eating a big ripe orange and then it drops to the ground where rats finish it off.
I put a live catch trap on the top of my fence cross 2x4 and cable tied it to the top of the fence, loading the bait bar with peanut butter. After catching many squirrels and releasing them 3 miles away in an orchard, I caught a rat that was 80% of his way out through the large wire mesh. Not wanting him to escape, I pulled out my only killing tool handy, a 2-inch blade pocketknife. I stuck it through the mesh into his abdomen and he turned his head around quickly and bit my index finger, drawing blood.
My first thought was the possibility of rabies. Then I badassed it and said to myself, "Rabies don't kill me, I kill rabies."
It was a year ago, so I was right, huh.
