The Briefing Room
General Category => National/Breaking News => Second Amendment => Topic started by: Elderberry on November 18, 2019, 01:39:15 am
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93.1FM WIBC by Brian Baker Nov. 11, 2019
Man Uses a Battle Ax to Attack Home Intruder
A resourceful individual with a passion for Vikings used an ax to battle a convicted criminal who broke into his Michigan apartment late Wednesday night.
Ben Ball, 36, used a replica battle-ax to fend off 33-year-old suspect, Alex Lavell Rawls, who is now in jail and facing a possible prison sentence of 20 years if he survives his injuries. You know how those meddling emergency room doctors can be. They're always saving lives without regard to the greater impact upon society. Not cool, docs! Not cool at all!
Anyway, Ball says that the suspect dated his former roommate who left to get away.
Hey, swell roommate! "Listen, Ben, I broke up with this guy and now he's trying to kill me. If he happens to show up with murder on his mind, just take a message and tell him I'm not here, okay?"
The suspect showed up at Ball and his terrible roommate's apartment around 11:30 p.m.
Rawls knocked on the door repeatedly, then kicked it in, while Ball was in his apartment playing video games and watching Rick and Morty.
Editor's Note: I didn't make the video games part or the Rick and Morty part up.
Ball said he believed the suspect had a firearm.
“(The) door opened, (I) grabbed the ax, (then) step, step, hit.â€
Editor's Note: The 'step, step, hit' technique is no longer permitted in professional battle ax tournaments. As of 2016, judges allow a maximum of one step per swing and the anchor foot must remain planted until the ax has traveled a minimum circumference of no less than 180 degrees.
More: https://www.wibc.com/blogs/tony-katz/2nd-amendment-success-story-battle-ax-edition (https://www.wibc.com/blogs/tony-katz/2nd-amendment-success-story-battle-ax-edition)
(https://www.wibc.com/sites/g/files/exi441/f/styles/large_730/public/201911/gettyimages-1157096638.jpg)
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Point of order Mr. Chairman: Who keeps a battle ax just laying around within reach in case someone tries to break in?
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Point of order Mr. Chairman: Who keeps a battle ax just laying around within reach in case someone tries to break in?
Maybe not a battle axe, but my son who's staying with us, as he's mostly off in the oil patch, has plenty of longswords to choose from. Some are trainers, but several I'm certain would shave hair.
(https://encrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcRCL5uM0Lb8ZbnfTnTGglHab0iOqgv6ohsGp8FaZm7SzHEn_-SqIw&s)
But he has plenty of firearms to choose from.
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Point of order Mr. Chairman: Who keeps a battle ax just laying around within reach in case someone tries to break in?
...Ball told a local media outlet that he owns a lot of weaponry like the Vikings and Barbarian warriors used long ago. When he’s not working at Applebee’s, he participates in events where people compete in ritualized combat....
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Editor's Note:
In the event that you one day have Ball as your server at Applebee's, we recommend tipping generously. You don't want an angry Viking wannabe with a giant ax chasing you through the parking lot to your car.