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Today's Toons 4/8/24
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In Case You Missed It Dept.:
In addition to declaring Transgender Visibility Day on Easter, President Biden also took Holy Communion with Bud Light.
President Biden flubbed the opening of the Easter Egg Roll Monday by welcoming thousands of attendees to the Oyster Egg Roll. His bearings were a little off. Upon waking up Monday, President Biden looked at the calendar and saw that it was April 1st, and remembered to set his clock back an hour.
President Biden, Jill and Hunter and two giant bunnies hosted the White House Easter Egg Roll Monday with forty thousand kids and parents in attendance. The TV cameras followed the kids all over the South Lawn. They dug up 960 eggs, 2 boxes of classified documents, and a gram of cocaine.
President Biden banned religious-themed decorations on the Easter Eggs for the White House Easter Egg Roll Saturday. The president caused further controversy by declaring Easter to be Transgender Visibility Day. Personally, I have a lot of respect for trans-women, that surgery takes balls.
All I did was I ask Google if I should try Tik Tok and it said no, the Chinese will spy on me. And now I'm on the FBI's Watch List.
President Biden proposed in his State of the Union speech a budget that would greatly increase the income tax rates on prosperous Americans. He's determined that everyone must pay their fair share. My accountant finished tabulating my federal income taxes Monday, and I owe Ukraine $63,467.
Donald Trump got into an angry back-and forth with Jimmy Kimmel for telling Trump over the air at the Oscars that it was past Trump's jail time. Hollywood should stick to doing what it does best, cocaine and each other. Most Americans think the L.A. Marathon is sitting through the Academy Awards.
Joe Biden told a joke in Dallas about a destitute Trump coming to him for help. The political hubris it takes to tell this joke on his opponent reminds me of the African big game hunter who's clearing a space on his den wall for a tiger he intends to kill on his next safari. The tiger has other ideas.
The Wall Street Journal reported from Haiti Monday that police in Port-au-Prince are battling the gang of cannibals that overthrew the government of Haiti, sending Haiti's governing regime into exile. It happens periodically. The last gang of criminals to take over Haiti was the Clinton Foundation.
Donald Trump issued a two-word statement to NY Attorney General Tish James today. Beep Beep!
Beverly Hills police say illegal migrant squatters took over a mansion while the owner was gone and turned it into a party house. The owner should advertise it for sale now. It's the only house in Beverly Hills where the pool boy, the yard man, the maid, the bartender and butler come factory-installed.
President Biden had a nice vacation at home in Wilmington last weekend. It let Joe spend time with his exiled dogs Major and Commander. The German Shepherds have calmed down a lot and stopped biting people since they stopped licking the sugar off the coffee table in the White House library.
California fast food chains will have to pay workers twenty dollars an hour starting Monday as restaurants diversified their menus. McDonald's announced they will add Krispy Kreme donuts to its breakfast menu. Not to be outdone, the Mexican Cartels announced they will produce Oxy Fentanyl.
Trump's father must have taught him if you're being chased by a gang of furious taxidermists, do NOT play dead.
President Biden quickly addressed reporters after the huge harbor bridge collapse in Baltimore after it was struck by a cargo container ship Tuesday. His determination was self-evident. President Biden promised that he will rebuild that bridge in its entirety only this time it will be over the Rio Grande.
Trump is now marketing his own Bible. Not to be outdone, Bill Clinton is coming out with his own Kama Sutra.
Truth Social went public Tuesday and the stock price soared, pumping up Trump's stock worth to five billion dollars. The Democrats in DC are livid. Nancy Pelosi is calling for a House probe of Truth Social because they failed to notify Nancy's Insider Trading Foundation before the stock offering.
Donald Trump's God Bless the USA Bible is faithful to the scriptures except that in this translation Jesus is betrayed by a kiss from Mike Pence.
-- Argus Hamilton
Polly Ticks:
Thanks, Pookie.
Speaking of a dark object obscuring the sun ... do you have any eclipse plans?
Jimino:
Ciao Pookie, thanks for the Monday toons!
Cyber Liberty:
Yaaaay! It's Monday, and Pookie is back from his weekend, and as usual he brought Argus with him!!!
pookie18:
--- Quote from: Polly Ticks on April 08, 2024, 12:46:11 pm ---Thanks, Pookie.
Speaking of a dark object obscuring the sun ... do you have any eclipse plans?
--- End quote ---
You're welcome, Polly Ticks! Maybe taking a very quick peek. Had a 4.8 earthquake on Fri. which was enough excitement for now...
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