Author Topic: Today's Toons 2/13/23 (Read 3660 times)

pookie18 · « **on:** February 13, 2023, 11:26:35 am »

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This Thread Brought To You By The Number 0:

In Case You Missed It Dept.:

The New York Times reported Friday there's growing concern in the Texas oil industry over what seismologists call the significant number of earthquakes rocking West Texas recently. You can't make it up. The cost of doing business is so high in California even the earthquakes are moving to Texas.

I'm planning to stay in a suite at the Plaza Hotel in New York, as soon as I've perfected my Nicaraguan accent.

New York's governor Kathy Hochul doubled down against critics of cashless bail and the soaring crime that's being committed by repeat offenders in New York City. They get out of jail hours after they commit felonies. Due to changing times, NBC is changing the name of Law & Order to Catch & Release.

New York Mayor Eric Adams stood outside a luxury hotel where illegal aliens are being housed Tuesday and announced a new shelter for the single male migrants. The single migrant guys are being kicked out of their luxury hotel rooms and they're angry. In fact they're threatening to leave the country.

The White House gave a proclamation today designating February as Black History Month. Last year, President Biden raised a lot of eyebrows by announcing a federal handout of thirty million crack pipes in the middle of Black History Month. It solidified Biden's ranking as America's edgiest comedian.

Elizabeth Warren hinted Sunday President Biden might find Kamala Harris to be a drag on the ticket in 2024. The numbers say it all. President Biden is polling at twenty-four percent in New Hampshire, ten points behind Pete Buttigieg, while Kamala is polling at two percent, tied with skim milk.

Biden says he will run for re-election in 2024, God willing. However, God does not select our presidents, the FBI does.

No one wants to say that Al Gore is getting old, but he just released a devastating report on diaper change.

Be sure and get vaccinated or a vaccinated person might get sick from the virus he got vaccinated against because you're not vaccinated.

I heard Alec Baldwin is shooting another movie this year. I hope he misses this time.

California Governor Gavin Newsom declared last week that mandating equity in business hiring will be a goal of his administration. For instance, recently I went to eat at Denny's and asked for a BLT. It took a while but eventually a bisexual, a lesbian and a trans-gender showed up to take my order.

Alec Baldwin got charged with involuntary manslaughter in the shooting of his cinematographer Tuesday. Get your popcorn. During the preliminary hearing, a gun expert for the defense said the shooting was caused by a loose nut behind the trigger, then a psychiatrist for the prosecution said the same thing.

New York faced protests by illegal aliens about their living conditions after they were bused in from the border and put up in three hundred dollar a night luxury hotel rooms. To their point, I don't see how decent people can live like this. The towels are so thick you can barely close your suitcase.

Biden came outside and saw his shadow this morning. That means 6 more weeks of comedy.

President Biden lost his train of thought yesterday. There were no survivors.

Polls say Biden has a great chance of being reelected as long as he continues to refuse to release his death certificate.

Chinese spy balloon spotted over US.The Pentagon wants to shoot it down while Eric Swalwell wants to take it to a motel with hourly rates.

Nobody bought China's original story that the spy balloon hovering over the U.S. was simply Macy's Groundhog Day Parade.

China's spy balloon made it as far as Chicago today where it was shot and killed.

The cartels are now offering balloon rides across our southern border. Imagine that!

Bernie Sanders embarks on a nationwide book tour, defying the current mood against communist gas bags flying across the US.

2nd China spy balloon now over Guatemala. This is war. Not only are they spying on Americans but on future Americans as well.

Joe Biden just told the Chinese to get off his lawn after they'd already toilet papered his house.

-- Argus Hamilton