He Used a Position of Power, In a Time of War, to Get What He Wanted.
NOVEMBER 29, 2022| ANDREA RENEE SANDOVAL RATHBUN
I am the worst person ever. I am THE WORST person ever. I AM the worst person EVER. I AM THE WORST PERSON EVER. i am the worst person ever.
I lived with these thoughts for a long time, and my family lived with me living with these thoughts. They raced through my head as I took my girls to school, as I hugged my husband goodbye, as I sat not watching a movie during family movie night. Mostly they pushed me as I cleaned, cooked, worked, praised, gave, and gave, and then gave again. But it was the other times that kept the thoughts going.
The other times usually started with a beer—well, not a beer; a beer started dancing in the kitchen and holding onto my dog’s front paws. Laughing and singing with my daughters. The other times started around four beers that tumbled into nine beers that led to days of me thinking and my family hurting.
The first time these thoughts became words I was hungover, my head aching, my eyes swollen, my husband pleading. I sat curled into a ball and said, “My brain won’t stop telling me that I am the worst person ever.” He asked why, and I didn’t know.
https://thewarhorse.org/army-veteran-finds-military-sexual-trauma-wasnt-her-fault/
