Author Topic: SEMI-NEWS/SEMI-SATIRE: October 30, 2022 Edition  (Read 731 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline John Semmens

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 590
  • Gender: Male
SEMI-NEWS/SEMI-SATIRE: October 30, 2022 Edition
« on: October 29, 2022, 07:48:53 am »
Leftist Literati Call for Censorship

A gaggle of 547 leftist "intellectuals" have signed a letter demanding that Penguin Random House cancel its agreement with Supreme Court Justice Amy Coney Barrett to publish a book she just wrote about maintaining judicial impartiality. The letter begins with a quote from Academy Award winning film producer Lord David Putnam that calls for a "balance freedom of expression with wider moral and social responsibilities."

The "wider moral and social responsibility" which Justice Barrett apparently failed to uphold was her participation in this year's US Supreme Court ruling overturning the 1973 Roe v. Wade decision. The letter appeals to a "higher authority," citing the UN's Universal Declaration of Human Rights' "recognition of abortion access as a fundamental human right."

Justice Coney Barrett called the letter "fundamentally flawed and unpersuasive. The US Supreme Court is bound to obey the US Constitution's limits on the wielding of power, not the UN's declarations. The authority to make laws regarding abortion fall under the Tenth Amendment clause 'the powers not delegated to the United States by the Constitution, nor prohibited by it to the States, are reserved to the States respectively, or to the people.' The 1973 Court had no authority to establish either a right to abortion or a regulation of abortion. The Court's decision rendered earlier this year corrected the 1973 error and restored the power that had been usurped by the 1973 Court back to the states."

The Justice added that "since abortion allows one human to take the life of another a human, the assertion by the UN that doing so is a 'fundamental human right' is a logical absurdity. Likewise, this group's contention that blocking the publication of my book is not censorship demonstrates a failure to grasp the meaning of the First Amendment."

Attorney General Merrick Garland criticized Barrett's "out-dated interpretation of the Supreme Court's role in our government. Tying us to a 200 year-old piece of paper is the antithesis of a progressive society. The tragedy of this year's Dobbs decision would have been avoided if my appointment to the Court hadn't been blocked by the Republicans in 2016. As it was, Roe v. Wade was too stingy with abortion rights. It allowed states to restrict abortions occurring in the third trimester of pregnancy. If I were in Barrett's place I would have expanded abortion rights beyond the narrow window Roe v. Wade established."

Meanwhile, Garland's goons in the FBI are preparing dossiers on those who spread "misleading" information about the upcoming elections. In leaked internal emails, agents were advised to be on the lookout for "election crimes that are committed intentionally or inadvertently by making false or inaccurate statements by candidates or their supporters that could lead to votes being diverted to dangerous enemies of democracy."

Could one of these dangerous enemies of democracy be President Biden? This week he claimed that "gasoline prices when I took office in January of 2021 were over $5 per gallon. We have now gotten them down to $3.39." Neither statement is correct. The average price when he took office was $2.39. The current national average price is $3.77 per gallon. The New York Times insisted "this is just good old Joe being folksy--like the time he bragged about having hairy legs. It's definitely not false or inaccurate."

Biden Offers Access for Votes

Polls showing that Rep. Sean Patrick Maloney (D-NY), chair of the Democratic Congressional Campaign Committee, may be unseated by GOP challenger Assemblyman Mike Lawler inspired President Biden to make an offer of "an open door access to my administration" to Rabbi David Twersky. Twersky is revered by Hasidic Jews in his district who are considered likely to heed the Rabbi's advice and vote for Maloney if he tells them to do so.

It might be a tough sell, though. Hassidic Jews in NY went heavily for Trump in the 2020 election. Maloney's support for ending cash bail, which many credit for a surge in the city's crime rate--including unprovoked assaults on Jews--may be a significant factor in turning this traditionally "safe" Democrat seat into a "toss up" race.

While the offer of an explicit payoff in exchange for votes is illegal, Biden discounted the possibility that he would be prosecuted for his influence peddling offer, saying "look, I've done this before. As you may recall, I leveraged my position as Vice-President to get a Ukrainian prosecutor who was harassing my son Hunter fired. I said if the guy wasn't gone by the time my flight departed Ukraine in a few hours I'd see to it that the billion dollar aid package they wanted wouldn't be paid. Son of a bitch, the guy got fired. I wasn't prosecuted then and I won't be now because Democrats again control the Department of Justice. It's called prosecutorial discretion."

In demented presidential news, Biden says that "inflation is no big deal. People can cope by reducing their expenditures on food. One trick that has worked for me is to get my Secret Service guys to pay for my ice cream, I point out that I never carry a wallet because it bags out my suit pants and that it's too dangerous for me to confront a potentially armed shopkeeper. It never fails."

Democrats Lose Series of Debates

In New York

Sitting Democrat Gov. Kathy Hochul squared off against GOP Rep. Lee Zeldin in a one hour televised debate. While Zeldin zeroed in on what he characterized as the Democrat's policy failures--high crime rates, high tax rates, and pandemic oppression, Hochul remained unfazed, professing herself "mystified by Mr. Zeldin's obsession with crime. Why is it so important to lock up criminals?"

She brushed off reporters' questions on this topic by pointing out that "most of the malcontents opposed to the state's criminal justice reform, high taxes, and covid coercion have already moved out of the state. Loyal Democrats out-number Republicans by a wide margin. There's no way Zeldin can win."

In Michigan

Republican gubernatorial candidate Tudor Dixon hammered incumbent Democrat Gov. Gretchen Whitmer for her "tyrannical pandemic edicts," saying "our children's education was set back by lengthy school closures. Their health is endangered by government pressure to take the experimental covid vaccines even though they are at very low risk from the disease. She urged the people to 'get the jab and get your liberties and freedoms back.'"

Whitmer responded by falsely alleging that "schools were only closed for three months" and promising "to ease up on coercion that is no longer necessary as the vast majority of the population has already been vaccinated. Voters can trust that in the future I would never do anything that isn't for their own good." A Michigan-based Fox affiliate weighed in on Whitmer's behalf by running a commercial during Dixon's opening statement.

In Pennsylvania

The inarticulate Democrat senate candidate John Fetterman blamed the closed captioning equipment he was allowed to use so his staff could feed him answers to the debate questions for his poor performance. An example of the "malfunctioning" device came when Fetterman was asked by a moderator to reconcile his 2018 statement that "I don't support fracking, at all and I never have" with his current assertion that he does. "I do support fracking. And, I don't, I don't—I support fracking, and I stand, and I do support fracking." Fetterman said.

Gary Weitman, Communications Officer for the station airing the debate asserted that "the equipment was not to blame for Mr. Fetterman's debate disaster. CNN's Chris Cuomo said "Fetterman struggled and his fitness for office is now in question." In a poll of those who saw the debate 82% said GOP candidate Dr. Mehmet Oz won the debate. "The View" loudmouth Joy Behar, insisted that "Oz broke the Hippocratic oath of 'do no harm.' As a doctor he should have stepped aside and let Fetterman run unopposed because the disabled deserve representation in Congress and Fetterman clearly fits the bill." The good news for Fetterman is that half of the mail-in votes were cast before the debate was aired.

In Arizona

Candidate for governor Secretary of State Katie Hobbs (D) refuses to debate GOP candidate Kari Lake. Hobbs said "a debate would be a strategic blunder for me. Lake is a communications expert with two decades of experience conveying ideas and information to voters. It's a no-win proposition for me to face her. You know, a famous statesman once said 'those who vote decide nothing, those who count the votes decide everything.' My strength lies in the fact that I am in charge of counting the votes. I'll put my energy into this phase of the election. We'll see who comes out on top November 8th."

Prior to Hobbs snubbing the debate the race was too close to call. Since Hobbs' refusal to debate has been noticed by voters, polls show Lake up by double digits. Whether Hobbs' vote-counting expertise can overcome Lake's apparent lead with voters remains to be seen.

Differing Views on Covid Policy

In 2021 New York City Mayor Bill de Blasio (D) mandated that city employees must get vaccinated or be fired. Nearly 1,700 employees refused to take the jab and were fired. This week a New York state court ordered all of these employees to be reinstated with back pay.

FDNY-Uniformed Firefighters Association President Andrew Ansbro and FDNY-Uniformed Fire Officers Association President Lt. James McCarthy praised the court's decision and lambasted current Mayor Eric Adams for insisting that his administration will not rehire any of these employees. "Refusing to obey a direct order--right or wrong--should never be rewarded," Adams pontificated.

Ansbro pointed out that "the Court's decision was based on what everybody now knows--being vaccinated does not prevent an individual from contracting or transmitting covid. It is profoundly unjust to continue punishing the firefighters who knew this before DeBlasio imposed the mandate that Adams still refuses to lift."

Meanwhile, President Biden got his fifth covid shot this week and urged Americans "to get more covid booster shots because they're incredibly effective. If you're fully vaccinated and boosted once a year you'll be protected from getting or transmitting the virus." Biden's faith in the vaccines was contradicted by the Lancet Covid-19 Commission's assessment that "the vaccines are ineffective and the government agencies promoting them are untrustworthy."

In Congress, Reps. Chip Roy (R-Texas) and Andy Biggs (R-Ariz) have called for "an investigation of the politically motivated decisions made by the Centers for Disease Control (CDC). The recent unanimous vote by the CDC Advisory Committee on Immunization Practices (ACIP) to add COVID-19 vaccines to the standard immunization schedule for children despite a Pfizer executive's admission that the COVID-19 vaccines were never tested for preventing transmission and the fact that children are at minimal risk from the disease clearly demonstrates that science is not the foundation for their decision-making."

Self-proclaimed covid expert Dr. Anthony Fauci chided Roy and Biggs as "men of little faith in government. At a time when unity is of paramount importance to the survival of our democracy, they instigate heresies that pose an incredibly dangerous peril. I hope that the President will have the strength to either bring these deviants to heel or destroy them if they resist."

Trump Won't Be Allowed to Testify in Public

Rep. Liz Cheney (R-Wyo), Co-chair of the House Select Committee investigating the January 6, 2021 insurrection, says "we can't allow Trump to testify in public. This would give the chief enemy of our country's democracy an unfiltered connection with which to deceive the American people. His testimony must be taken secretly so the Committee can edit his remarks before airing them to the general public."

She characterized Trump's demand that the hearing be broadcast live as "fundamentally dishonest. The idea that people should be able to see it all and judge for themselves is a risk we cannot not tolerate. The people are unqualified to judge for themselves. They need the government to protect them from his evil words."

Cheney also denied that the rights to a speedy and public trial by an impartial jury guaranteed by the Sixth Amendment "do not apply in Trump's case. Those rights only protect the innocent. Trump is definitely not innocent. It is the duty of the Select Committee to determine the magnitude of his guilt and impose the appropriate penalty. My own personal opinion is that as the instigator of the January 6 insurrection he bears responsibility for the murder of his co-conspirator Ashli Babbitt."

Offline mystery-ak

  • Owner
  • Administrator
  • ******
  • Posts: 381,821
  • Gender: Female
  • Let's Go Brandon!
Re: SEMI-NEWS/SEMI-SATIRE: October 30, 2022 Edition
« Reply #1 on: October 30, 2022, 12:58:52 am »
Quote
She brushed off reporters' questions on this topic by pointing out that "most of the malcontents opposed to the state's criminal justice reform, high taxes, and covid coercion have already moved out of the state. Loyal Democrats out-number Republicans by a wide margin. There's no way Zeldin can win."

I can see her saying that..lol

Proud Supporter of Tunnel to Towers
Support the USO
Democrat Party...the Party of Infanticide

“Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.”
-Matthew 6:34

Offline John Semmens

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 590
  • Gender: Male
Re: SEMI-NEWS/SEMI-SATIRE: October 30, 2022 Edition
« Reply #2 on: November 01, 2022, 05:19:04 pm »
Mystery-ak,

Thx

I strive for accuracy.

John