Author Topic: Today's Toons 2/21/22 (Read 3870 times)

pookie18 · « **on:** February 21, 2022, 11:22:13 am »

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This Thread Brought To You By The Letter T:

(Thank you, Polly Ticks)

In Case You Missed It Dept.:

CNN boss Jeff Zucker resigned for failing to notify CNN of an office affair amid sinking ratings and lost credibility. Seems the only guy at CNN who can keep his hands to himself is Jeffrey Toobin. Last night I told Alexa to turn on CNN, I want to watch the news. She told me to pick one or the other.

Walt Disney ignited a cancel culture controversy disclosing it'll shoot a movie of Snow White and the Seven Dwarves starring real actors. The White House was consulted to guard against being canceled. President Biden just named a qualified black woman to play the role of Snow White.

Whoopi Goldberg declared on ABC's The View that the Holocaust had nothing to do with race, prompting public outrage. It resulted in her getting suspended from the show. President Biden happened to be in Manhattan Thursday and he vowed to fill the vacancy with a qualified white male.

Whoopi Goldberg was reported threatening to quit as co-host of The View every morning after she was suspended for claiming the Holocaust wasn't about race. I don't think ABC thought this all the way through. Do they realize the size of the crane they'll have to rent in order to suspend her?

The Weather Channel said a massive winter storm has put America in a deep freeze, prompting swift government response. The CDC immediately reported the snowfall totals will be high, but the chances of getting it will be lower if you're vaccinated. And if it does snow it won't affect you as much.

The White House was hit by a stunning poll Thursday showing Hillary Clinton is leading Joe Biden in Florida for president in 2024. One debacle after another has eroded his support. Even Betty White had said she wasn't going to vote for President Biden in 2024, but she probably will now.

Speaker Nancy Pelosi ignited a firestorm when she addressed the cameras Friday and ordered the U.S. Olympic athletes in China to just be quiet and not to question the government. However it was an honest mix-up in her speech notes to the athletes. That was her welcome home to America speech.

Canada's Prime Minister Justin Trudeau laid low in Covid quarantine as angry truckers staged a massive rolling protest in Ottawa against vaccination mandates for truckers. Justin means well. Trudeau is demanding that truckers get vaccinated like he did, so they don't catch Covid like he did.

Ukraine's peril inspires me to offer the Hamilton Plan. We get Ukraine and Mexico to switch places on the map, halting two invasions. America's southern border gets secured by NATO and if Russia invades a country with Mexican food and legalized cocaine, their troops will never come home.

President Biden's pledge of racial equity was enacted this week, spending thirty million dollars to give drug addicts free crack pipes large enough to hold a half-gram of crack. Joe picked the perfect week to turn into Oprah. You get a super bowl and you get a super bowl, everybody gets a super bowl!

French President Macron flew back and forth from Moscow to Kiev to try to prevent war from breaking out. My Hamilton Plan for preventing Russia from invading Ukraine is to change the name of their country to Afghanistan. And as a bonus, they get free American military equipment, too.

David Crosby, Steven Stills, and Graham Nash joined Neil Young leaving Spotify Monday. In 1969, they left the Byrds, the Hollies and Buffalo Springfield to form Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young. After breaking up in the mid-70s the group re-united this week and formed the Pompous Know-It-Alls.

The White House was hit by a CNN poll showing sixty percent of Americans believe President Biden has done nothing while in office. I'm sure they saw this poll coming. You know things are bad when the White House wants to hand out free crack pipes ahead of the State of the Union speech.

CNN host Don Lemon was ordered to stand trial for a sexual assault charge brought by a Sag Harbor bartender. Once again sexual misconduct charges strike CNN. Just last week, CNN's boss Jeff Zucker resigned so quickly CNN pundits are absolutely speechless. So, some good came of it.

- - Argus Hamilton