Autobiography of Joe Biden, Lyin' Dog-Faced Pony Soldier
By Jim Thompson | Jan 13, 2022 12:15 PM ET
The Life and Times Of A Lyin’ Dog-faced Pony Soldier. As told by Joe Biden to JimmyToons Thompson (Abridged Edition)
Chapter One
My name is Joseph R. Biden. I was born in a Scranton, Pennsylvania, coal mine on November 20, 1942. I came from the long line of coal miners. It was in my blood, man. Literally. When I came out I was already covered in coal dust. That’s not hyperbole, man. True story. It happened. I opened my eyes, and God’s truth, instead of crying, I got right to work. I cut my own umbilical and pitched a coal axe. I can still see my dad’s smile through his coal dust-covered face.
My pops, he had ambitions for me. Like the Kennedys, my pops, God rest his soul — he wanted more for me.
My mom, God rest her soul, wanted to name me Derek Zoolander after, you know, another long line of coalminers. But my dad said no, “he’s Joseph Robinette Jr” and he’s gonna be president some day.” Hand on the Bible, folks, that what he said. I was there, man! I heard it.
My family moved to Delaware because my dad wanted to make his fortune selling used Buicks. He sold more Buicks than Ford sold Mustangs. God’s Truth, but never mind, that’s another story, folks.
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https://redstate.com/jimthompson/2022/01/13/autobiography-of-joe-biden-lyin-dog-faced-pony-soldier-n505860
