It’s always best to find someone when you aren’t looking. In my opinion, when I was actively looking, I would find people who would hone in on the fact I was looking, and they turned out to be abusive. One was emotional, the other physical.
When I wasn’t looking I met the love of my life and he wasn’t looking either. This made our relationship much sweeter.
Not to make this all about me—because I've gone over this topic
ad nauseum enough as it is—but I suspect that the situation is different for women than it is for men. Our society is still hung up on the hunt: men are expected to pursue the women. That's why when you were single and looking, you were like a huge piece of bait in a freshly stocked pond. A man does not have that luxury. I put myself out there as single and interested, and women run away. It's been that way since I was a teenager. I can make friends with women effortlessly, but broach the topic of romance, and boom. It ruins everything. It's a constant game of Russian roulette with all six bullets in the chamber.
I officially gave up on it a few months ago. The life I wanted to live through a relationship, marriage and family—it's no longer possible, and there are nights where I sit up at night, wondering why I'm even a flesh and blood human being if I can't even do this. I'm so disgusted with my generation. I see my parents' generation, my grandparents' generations, and how big their families were by my age... and though that may be a little extreme, I see the abundance of women my age who still have nothing, nor do they want it.
I just don't see the point anymore. At this juncture, even if a woman were to show interest in me, I'd be angry more than anything. Where were you when I needed it so desperately years ago?
It's sad.
