I don't have any need or desire to fit in. Part of a group? Yay! Not part of a group? Yay!
People dismay me. I don't relate to most of the things other guys do/say/like.
I dance with the wallflowers.
I avoid everyone but don't shun anyone.
I'll give you the shirt off my back but if I find out you were just using me I'll rip that shirt off you and strangle you with it.
Those kind of things.
Fred, that sounds familiar--real familiar.
I was taught from an early age to treat everyone with a basic, fundamental respect and adjust from there. Some drop on the scale, others go up, but my human heroes are few, and to me, my Father will always be one of them. I think Kipling summed it up best:
If all men count with you,
But none too much.
I have been part of a team, led a team, been last to be picked for a team, worked alone, and been comfortable in most of those situations. I have borne witness to the nasty and destructive nature of people who desperately need to feel important, and pity them--and those who fall for what they often wrongly convince others to do.
Some are so desperate to achieve those ends, they'd sell their souls.
No thanks. If that's the price of belonging or feeling successful or important, I'll do without. I'm just passing through this life anyway.
I have found a lot of oil on someone else's clock, had years when my decisions materially affected the success of 100 million dollars worth of projects, even helped start an oil boom, but that was all insignificant compared to getting a shell shocked neighbor's kid to realize the baby, not breathing, limp and turning blue they took out to the ambulance was crying, and you have to breathe to cry. The relief I saw in that child's face told me how important that was (it was her baby sister). As family goes, well, we were warned: "A prophet is not without honor, save in his own country". It's great when you can get through, you do your best, but there are no guarantees.
Still, it's the little things we do, sometimes not realizing what a difference they make, that are really important. It's in how you measure success, and while some money is nice, there are entirely different metrics which cannot be quantified.
The only one I need to be close to is Almighty God. If I'm doing that right, there will be other folks who gather near Him, too.