Ridiculous News of the Day

[Cyber Liberty]

Peel Regional Police allege the man was drinking at a bar early Wednesday morning

Drinking early in the morning on a weekday, unless you are fishing, camping, or at a ball game, is usually a big sign of a potential problem.

Yeah, chronic unemployment is but one of them.

[Free Vulcan]

Woman has a pen cap lodged in her lung for 40 years after accidentally swallowing it as a child

A woman in China who accidentally swallowed a plastic pen lid as a child has discovered that it was still lodged inside her body 40 years later.

The 49-year-old woman, from Shandong Province, had been admitted to the hospital after suffering from pain in her abdomen.

Doctors found a foreign object in her right lung after running a CT scan, but didn't realise it was a four-decade-old pen cap until they removed parts of her lung tissue to extracted the lodged item. 

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-6062305/Woman-49-pen-cap-lodged-lungs-40-years-swallowing-child.html

[Free Vulcan]

Attacker goes after four young girls in attempted kidnapping, quickly finds he’s no match for them

A 22-year-old man reportedly attacked a group of young girls, ages 11 to 14, and they took matters into their own hands — possibly saving their own lives.
What are the details?

The incident occurred Friday night in Millington, Michigan, when Bruce Hipkins reportedly decided to follow four young girls who were in a Speedway gas station.
Special: Wall Street about to pour $5 trillion into Bitcoin? Prepare and get rich

WJRT-TV reported that Hipkins — who was also inside the gas station — watched the girls while they were inside the store, buying beverages. Hipkins reportedly followed the group on foot when they left the store.

The girls reportedly noticed that Hipkins was following them, so they crossed the street to a better lit area in order to avoid the lurking man. Hipkins, the girls said, followed them anyway...

https://www.theblaze.com/news/2018/08/15/attacker-goes-after-four-young-girls-in-attempted-kidnapping-quickly-finds-hes-no-match-for-them

[sneakypete]

Attacker goes after four young girls in attempted kidnapping, quickly finds he’s no match for them

A 22-year-old man reportedly attacked a group of young girls, ages 11 to 14, and they took matters into their own hands — possibly saving their own lives.
What are the details?

The incident occurred Friday night in Millington, Michigan, when Bruce Hipkins reportedly decided to follow four young girls who were in a Speedway gas station.
Special: Wall Street about to pour $5 trillion into Bitcoin? Prepare and get rich

WJRT-TV reported that Hipkins — who was also inside the gas station — watched the girls while they were inside the store, buying beverages. Hipkins reportedly followed the group on foot when they left the store.

The girls reportedly noticed that Hipkins was following them, so they crossed the street to a better lit area in order to avoid the lurking man. Hipkins, the girls said, followed them anyway...

https://www.theblaze.com/news/2018/08/15/attacker-goes-after-four-young-girls-in-attempted-kidnapping-quickly-finds-hes-no-match-for-them

@Free Vulcan

The best news I have read in a long time. I am hoping that animal goes away for a long,long time. You can bet your bippy this wasn't his first time at bat,and that the police will do all they can do to check his background.

[GtHawk]

I get your point, and I agree with the concept (I have known people who were such consistent drinkers there was no obvious impairment at levels even higher than that), but legally, he is defined as impaired, whether ill effects are apparent or not. It is certain he was not exercising good judgement, and one of the fundamental problems with acute excessive alcohol consumption is that judgement is impaired. Kind of a 'Hold my beer and watch this, eh." moment.

I used to work with one, we one time had a job out of town and shared a room, I watched him down a six pack, and then another and then he walked to the liquor store and came back with two tall boys and down them all in less than two hours and he showed not one visible sign of inebriation, no slurred speech or unsteadiness. I made damn sure after that that he never drove when we were together.

[Smokin Joe]

I once asked one of my grandkids what they'd do, what they'd say if someone grabbed them and dragged them down the street. The shouted response? "I DIDN'T DO IT!!"

After a good laugh, we told and taught them how to resist, but one better to never travel alone (call us we will come and get you) to run toward an area where there are adults--especially a business, and to travel in groups.

Good for these girls. Glad they got the perp.

[mountaineer]

Mayor to female commissioner: You make a living off anal bleaching. It’s a #MeToo moment, she says
By Sarah Blaskey
miamiherald.com
August 15, 2018 04:02 PM
Updated 2 hours 19 minutes ago

When Hallandale Beach Mayor Keith London said “sphincter bleaching is a very up and coming business,” during the City Commission’s budget discussion Monday night, he may have been right. But whether he thought anal bleach had anything to do with public safety budgets — the topic being discussed — remains unclear.

Why London thought it relevant, much less appropriate, to accuse a female commissioner of making her living from bleaching her own anus is even more baffling.

“Was it getting my sphincter bleached, is that what I earned my income for?” London said to Commissioner Anabelle Lima-Taub, as the two exchanged personal attacks. “No that would be you.”  ...

Read more here: https://www.miamiherald.com/news/local/community/broward/article216726340.html#storylink=cpy

[sneakypete]

Read more here: https://www.miamiherald.com/news/local/community/broward/article216726340.html#storylink=cpy

“Was it getting my sphincter bleached, is that what I earned my income for?” London said to Commissioner Anabelle Lima-Taub, as the two exchanged personal attacks. “No that would be you.”  ...

@mountaineer

Am I the only one curious about how he knew that about her?

[mountaineer]

@mountaineer

Am I the only one curious about how he knew that about her?

I only can assume it's a topic about which he's devoted considerable thought.

[Sanguine]

I only can assume it's a topic about which he's devoted considerable thought.

 

[sneakypete]

I only can assume it's a topic about which he's devoted considerable thought.

@mountaineer

This is one of those rare political times when you really don't want to know any more,and think you may have already heard too much.

[Suppressed]

Man shouldn’t have gone to jail for getting a job at Michael’s instead of Home Depot, court rules
By Andrew Pantazi
Posted Aug 14, 2018 at 4:21 PM
Updated Aug 14, 2018 at 6:19 PM
     
Alfred Scott was arrested for a first-time marijuana offense last year, but he was willing to plead guilty and he even lined up a full-time job at Home Depot to show he deserved mercy.

But when that job fell through and he got a job at Michael’s instead, Judge Russell Healey seemed to insist that the job needed to be at Home Depot. Healey decided his mercy had been worn out. For getting a job at the wrong store, Healey sent Scott to jail for 90 days.

[...]

http://www.jacksonville.com/news/20180814/man-shouldnt-have-gone-to-jail-for-getting-job-at-michaels-instead-of-home-depot-court-rules

[mountaineer]

Police Commander Filmed Sex On Department Bodycam
Sandy Malone
BlueLivesMatter

Superior, AZ – A police commander was fired after his department found a bodycam video of him having sex with a woman in his office.

A Pinal County Sheriff’s Office report said the videos were found in a folder called “FUN TIME” that was saved on the computer of former Superior Police Commander Anthony Doran’s department-issued computer, KPNX reported.

The sheriff’s report described a nearly four-minute video dated April of 2017 that showed then-Commander Doran wearing a uniform shirt with the Superior police patch, but no pants or underwear, Heavy reported.

“Anthony is sitting in an office chair and straddling him is a naked adult female (who is not a police employee),” the report said.

In the video, it appeared the commander had removed his bodycam and placed it in a position to record himself having sex with a woman in his office desk chair.  ...

Investigators also found naked pictures of the commander’s five-year-old daughter in the “FUN TIME” folder, prompting “suspicion that some grooming behavior may be present,” the sheriff’s department’s report said.  ...

[TomSea]

Georgia police use Taser on 87-year-old woman using knife to cut dandelions
"If three police officers couldn't handle an 87-year-old woman, you might want to reconsider hanging up your badge," said the woman's great-nephew.
by Associated Press / Aug.16.2018 / 7:07 AM ET

CHATSWORTH, Ga. — A Georgia police chief said an officer was justified in using a Taser to stun an 87-year-old woman after she didn't obey commands to drop a knife in her hand.

Martha Al-Bishara was charged with criminal trespass and obstructing an officer Friday, when police held her at gunpoint before bringing her to the ground with a jolt from the electrified prongs of a stun gun.

Relatives said Al-Bishara doesn't speak English and was merely out cutting dandelions with a kitchen knife near her home in Chatsworth, about 85 miles north of Atlanta.

https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/georgia-police-use-taser-87-year-old-woman-using-knife-n901196

[sneakypete]

The sheriff’s report described a nearly four-minute video

@mountaineer

WOW! A whole 4 minutes! Wadda stud! </S>

Investigators also found naked pictures of the commander’s five-year-old daughter in the “FUN TIME” folder, prompting “suspicion that some grooming behavior may be present,” the sheriff’s department’s report said.  ...

Just kill him and be done with it.

[mountaineer]

Just kill him and be done with it.

I can't disagree. What a slime.

[Suppressed]

Beer deliverymen talk man out of jumping off bridge by offering him a 12-pack of Coors Light
Samantha Schmidt, The Washington Post | on August 17, 2018

Jason Gaebel and Kwame Anderson don't usually cross the bridge over Interstate 94 in St. Paul, Minn. But this Wednesday morning, for no reason in particular, the beer deliverymen decided to take a different route, they told local news stations.

[...]

https://m.sfgate.com/news/article/Beer-deliverymen-talk-man-out-of-jumping-off-13162924.php

[Sanguine]

Beer deliverymen talk man out of jumping off bridge by offering him a 12-pack of Coors Light
Samantha Schmidt, The Washington Post | on August 17, 2018

Jason Gaebel and Kwame Anderson don't usually cross the bridge over Interstate 94 in St. Paul, Minn. But this Wednesday morning, for no reason in particular, the beer deliverymen decided to take a different route, they told local news stations.

[...]

https://m.sfgate.com/news/article/Beer-deliverymen-talk-man-out-of-jumping-off-13162924.php

Good story.  Sometimes it's something as simple as a conversation and a 12-pack that makes all the difference.

[mountaineer]

Man freed by Innocence Project accused of child sexual assault
Natasha Lindstrom and Rich Cholodofsky | Friday, Aug. 17, 2018, 5:51 p.m.
Updated 47 minutes ago

A man freed from prison in May after a judge vacated his 1991 rape conviction in Westmoreland County was arrested Thursday on charges of sexually assaulting a 7-year-old child at his home in McKees Rocks.

John Kunco, 53, previously of Harrison, was arraigned Friday on charges of aggravated indecent assault, unlawful contact with a minor, corruption, endangering the welfare of children and indecent assault.

Court documents list the date of the offenses as May 23, the day Kunco was released from prison after serving nearly 28 years of a 45- to 90-year sentence in an unrelated rape case.  ...

Full story at Tribune Review

[Suppressed]

Man Busted with 800 Pounds of Stolen Lemons in SoCal
https://www.nbcsandiego.com/news/california/Man-Busted-Pounds-Stolen-Lemons-491721071.html

Published at 10:29 PM PDT on Aug 25, 2018


Riverside County Sheriff's Department
Dionicio Fierros was arrested after police say they found 800 pounds of allegedly stolen lemons in his vehicle.

A 69-year-old man was arrested in Thermal, California, for possessing hundreds of pounds of lemons allegedly stolen from a nearby farm, a sheriff's sergeant said Saturday.

Dionicio Fierros of Los Angeles was pulled over at 9:45 a.m. Friday at the intersection of Grapefruit Boulevard and Pierce Street and was arrested when deputies found 800 pounds of freshly picked lemons in his vehicle that sheriff's officials said were stolen.

The arrest was part of a larger ongoing investigation into agriculture theft in the Coachella Valley, Riverside Country Sheriff's Sgt. Chris Frederick said.

[...]

[Applewood]

Bride cancels wedding, breaks up with fiancé after friends and family refuse to pay for $60G nuptials

A woman’s long-winded tirade blaming her friends and family for canceling her dream $60,000 wedding has gone viral on social media.

...

The bride, identified as Susan, then reveals that she and her fiancé have broken up “due to some recent and irreparable problems” before going on to blame her friends and family for “ruin[ing] my marriage and life.”

...

“How could we have OUR wedding that WE dreamed of without proper funding? We’d sacrificed so much and only asked each guest for around $1,500.”

The bride also explained she “made it CLEAR. If you couldn’t contribute, you weren’t invited to our exclusive wedding. It’s a once and a lifetime [sic] party.”

Much to the bride’s dismay, she and her fiancé quickly discovered that people were not willing to pay $1,500 to attend their special day.

...

This is hilarious.  Read more at:

www.foxnews.com/lifestyle/2018/08/27/bride-cancels-wedding-breaks-up-with-fianc-after-friends-and-family-refuse-to-pay-for-60g-nuptials.html

[Free Vulcan]

Amanda Smith Hayes convicted after trying to feed Laura Ackerson's body to alligators

Amanda Smith Hayes, a North Carolina woman convicted of helping her husband dispose of his ex-girlfriend's body, has now been convicted of trying to dissolve the remains in acid and then throwing them into an alligator-infested creek.

In 2014, Smith (formerly Hayes) and her husband Grant Ruffin Hayes III were found guilty in the 2011 death and dismemberment of 27-year-old Laura Ackerson.

Prosecutors said the couple killed Ackerson at their Raleigh apartment during a long-running custody dispute over Grant's two oldest children.

https://abc11.com/1315221/

[thackney]

Amanda Smith Hayes convicted after trying to feed Laura Ackerson's body to alligators

Amanda Smith Hayes, a North Carolina woman convicted of helping her husband dispose of his ex-girlfriend's body, has now been convicted of trying to dissolve the remains in acid and then throwing them into an alligator-infested creek.

In 2014, Smith (formerly Hayes) and her husband Grant Ruffin Hayes III were found guilty in the 2011 death and dismemberment of 27-year-old Laura Ackerson.

Prosecutors said the couple killed Ackerson at their Raleigh apartment during a long-running custody dispute over Grant's two oldest children.

https://abc11.com/1315221/

I wonder if the acid threw off the gators and led them to getting caught.

In unrelated news, I still have the six and eight foot gators in my slough.  No luck catching them over the past 10 days.

[mountaineer]

Bride cancels wedding, breaks up with fiancé after friends and family refuse to pay for $60G nuptials

Sounds like he finally caught on to what a *itch she was.

[sneakypete]

Amanda Smith Hayes convicted after trying to feed Laura Ackerson's body to alligators

Amanda Smith Hayes, a North Carolina woman convicted of helping her husband dispose of his ex-girlfriend's body, has now been convicted of trying to dissolve the remains in acid and then throwing them into an alligator-infested creek.

In 2014, Smith (formerly Hayes) and her husband Grant Ruffin Hayes III were found guilty in the 2011 death and dismemberment of 27-year-old Laura Ackerson.

Prosecutors said the couple killed Ackerson at their Raleigh apartment during a long-running custody dispute over Grant's two oldest children.

https://abc11.com/1315221/

@Free Vulcan

Sadly,this happy couple have now filed for divorce after both being convicted. The report I read said they had resolved their property issues,so I am assuming one of them now owns a Bic lighter,free and clear.