Whacko Liberal Wants A Government Penis Confiscation
By Brian Anderson, December 19, 2014.
I think I may have found the craziest gun control rant ever. I know I’ve said this before, but you really need to check this out. What makes this piece utterly insane is not that the author wants the government to seize control of all private firearms, but rather that men should be forced to surrender their penises. Oh, and this was written by a man, kind of.
Appearing on the San Diego Free Press, Penis Control Before Gun Control actually starts out in favor of private gun ownership rights. It’s not as wholesome as you would think because author Will Falk believes people need guns to fight off the racist police, the Indian killing government, and most of all: men, who are all potential rapists.
After a seemingly endless rant about how the system does nothing but kill black people, rape women, and commit genocide against indigenous people, Falk finally gets to his proposal of de-wanging all American men:
I propose, then, in the interests of fairness that before we take guns away from women, men should give up their penises. Men with penises are, after all, hurting more women than women with guns are hurting men (or anyone, for that matter).
I know that most will not take my compromise seriously and I want to know why. Penises and guns have been used to inflict devastating amounts of pain and they have also been used in ways that benefit communities. Many do not view penises as inherently evil while they do view guns as inherently evil, but in each case is it not the character of the person using each that determines the goodness or evilness of the object?
Penises and guns have also come to symbolize power. The mere fact of being a man in this culture, the mere fact of possessing a penis, grants men access to arbitrary privileges that harm women. A gun on the hip of a policeman or on the shoulder of a solider is enough to scare most people into subservience.
If the gun control movement is going to take power away from women in the form of the right to own a gun, then they should ask men to give up their power in the form of their penis. Penises for guns, weapons for weapons. It’s only fair.
You probably thought my headline was an exaggeration, didn’t you? This was not taken out of context, nor is it satire. This guy (yes, guy) wants men to be stripped of their penile rights. I bet you couldn’t find a hardcore feminist making such a bonkers demand.
Luckily, in Falk’s demented rant, he gives us some insight into his truly disturbed mind:
To make this more personal, I cannot own a gun because of a failed suicide attempt in California. It makes no difference to the State that I tried to kill myself with pills and that I currently have enough pills with me right now to finish the job. I also engage in frontline resistance and my writing has earned me some nasty messages from people I’m truly afraid of. I would like a gun, but I cannot own one.
As far as I can tell, Falk is terribly unhappy with himself so he feels that all men should lose their penises, or something like that. I think he should set the example and volunteer his member for confiscation. Chop it off and send it to Dianne Feinstein, she’ll know what to do with it.
Obviously, the 2nd Amendment protects our gun ownership rights, but nearly everything else in the Bill of Rights would keep the government from a massive scale penis confiscation: freedom of expression, illegal search and seizure, cruel and unusual punishment, etc…
Then again, liberals don’t respect the 2A very much so maybe we shouldn’t get too comfortable with the other amendments. I fight for my gun rights and I will fight for my dong rights as well. I say this to all the leftist dick-grabbers: You can have my penis when you pry it from my cold dead hand!
Wait, that didn’t come out right. Aw, who am I kidding? That’s exactly what I meant to say.
http://downtrend.com/71superb/whacko-liberal-wants-a-massive-penis-confiscation/
