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Author Topic: The Official TBR Silliness Thread: 2013-2016  (Read 118276 times)

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Offline Machiavelli

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Re: The Official TBR Silliness Thread
« Reply #150 on: May 14, 2014, 09:53:33 pm »
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Offline DCPatriot

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Re: The Official TBR Silliness Thread
« Reply #151 on: May 14, 2014, 10:22:32 pm »
Quote from: Machiavelli on May 14, 2014, 09:53:33 pm
Spurious Correlations

How does one expire getting tangled up in their bedsheets?

in fact.....how does one get tangled in their bedsheets?   
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"It aint what you don't know that kills you.  It's what you know that aint so!" ...Theodore Sturgeon

"Journalism is about covering the news.  With a pillow.  Until it stops moving."    - David Burge (Iowahawk)

"It was only a sunny smile, and little it cost in the giving, but like morning light it scattered the night and made the day worth living" F. Scott Fitzgerald

Offline EC

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Re: The Official TBR Silliness Thread
« Reply #152 on: May 14, 2014, 10:23:26 pm »
Nightmares.
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Offline DCPatriot

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Re: The Official TBR Silliness Thread
« Reply #153 on: May 14, 2014, 10:27:28 pm »
Quote from: EC on May 14, 2014, 10:23:26 pm
Nightmares.

Then the cause of death is not asphyxiation, but rather a heart attack?  Still puzzled....   :laugh:


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"It aint what you don't know that kills you.  It's what you know that aint so!" ...Theodore Sturgeon

"Journalism is about covering the news.  With a pillow.  Until it stops moving."    - David Burge (Iowahawk)

"It was only a sunny smile, and little it cost in the giving, but like morning light it scattered the night and made the day worth living" F. Scott Fitzgerald

Offline EC

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Re: The Official TBR Silliness Thread
« Reply #154 on: May 14, 2014, 10:35:54 pm »
Quote from: DCPatriot on May 14, 2014, 10:27:28 pm
Then the cause of death is not asphyxiation, but rather a heart attack?  Still puzzled....   :laugh:

Bit grave for the silliness thread - it's a bit of both. You thrash around, get the sheet caught around your neck. At the same time, your heart rate is way up. It doesn't take much restriction to simply shut you down for good. Had a policy - been on a bad run? You sleep on top of the covers. No excuses.

To get back on track:

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Offline DCPatriot

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Re: The Official TBR Silliness Thread
« Reply #155 on: May 14, 2014, 10:47:50 pm »
Thanks for explaining that for me, EC.   :beer:
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"It aint what you don't know that kills you.  It's what you know that aint so!" ...Theodore Sturgeon

"Journalism is about covering the news.  With a pillow.  Until it stops moving."    - David Burge (Iowahawk)

"It was only a sunny smile, and little it cost in the giving, but like morning light it scattered the night and made the day worth living" F. Scott Fitzgerald

Offline Machiavelli

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Re: The Official TBR Silliness Thread
« Reply #156 on: May 15, 2014, 02:55:42 am »
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Offline Machiavelli

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Re: The Official TBR Silliness Thread
« Reply #157 on: May 15, 2014, 04:17:11 pm »
There once was a powerful Japanese emperor who needed a new chief samurai. So he sent out a declaration throughout the entire known world that he was searching for a chief.

A year passed, and only three people applied for the very demanding position: a Japanese samurai, a Chinese samurai, and a Jewish samurai.

The emperor asked the Japanese samurai to come in and demonstrate why he should be the chief samurai. The Japanese samurai opened a matchbox, and out popped a bumblebee. Whoosh! went his sword. The bumblebee dropped dead, chopped in half. The emperor exclaimed, "That is very impressive!"

The emperor then issued the same challenge to the Chinese samurai, to come in and demonstrate why he should be chosen. The Chinese samurai also opened a matchbox and out buzzed a fly. Whoosh, whoosh, whoosh! The fly dropped dead, chopped into four small pieces. The emperor exclaimed, "That is very impressive!"

Now the emperor turned to the Jewish samurai, and asked him to demonstrate why he should be the chief samurai. The Jewish Samurai opened a matchbox, and out flew a gnat. His flashing sword went Whoosh! But the gnat was still alive and flying around.

The emperor, obviously disappointed, said, "Very ambitious, but why is that gnat not dead?"

The Jewish Samurai just smiled and said, "Circumcision is not meant to kill."
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Offline EC

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Re: The Official TBR Silliness Thread
« Reply #158 on: May 16, 2014, 02:22:07 pm »
Jesus is sitting in the shade outside a small town. In the distance he hears a noise, getting steadily closer. A woman runs up to him, throws herself down and grabs the hem of his robe.

"Save me, Lord, they wish to stone me for being a prostitute." He stands suddenly, arms crossed, glaring at the crowd, who come to a sudden stop.

"He who without sin, cast the first stone." The crowd shuffles, looks at the ground and each other, anywhere but at Jesus. He helps the woman to her feet, when suddenly a stone comes flying out of nowhere, hitting her hard on the shoulder. The crowd looks around, and a pathway opens between our Lord and the thrower. He looks hard, then sighs.

"Dammit, Mom. Not you."
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Offline Machiavelli

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Re: The Official TBR Silliness Thread
« Reply #159 on: May 16, 2014, 02:51:08 pm »
 :silly:
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Offline Machiavelli

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Re: The Official TBR Silliness Thread
« Reply #160 on: May 16, 2014, 02:53:01 pm »
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Offline Machiavelli

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Re: The Official TBR Silliness Thread
« Reply #161 on: May 16, 2014, 03:04:56 pm »
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Offline Machiavelli

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Re: The Official TBR Silliness Thread
« Reply #162 on: May 29, 2014, 07:59:26 pm »
Meanwhile In Ethiopia

Goat riding man for a change.

http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=30e_1401360571
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Offline Machiavelli

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Re: The Official TBR Silliness Thread
« Reply #163 on: May 31, 2014, 05:36:35 pm »
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Offline Machiavelli

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Re: The Official TBR Silliness Thread
« Reply #164 on: May 31, 2014, 08:14:01 pm »
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Offline DCPatriot

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Re: The Official TBR Silliness Thread
« Reply #165 on: May 31, 2014, 08:40:07 pm »
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"It aint what you don't know that kills you.  It's what you know that aint so!" ...Theodore Sturgeon

"Journalism is about covering the news.  With a pillow.  Until it stops moving."    - David Burge (Iowahawk)

"It was only a sunny smile, and little it cost in the giving, but like morning light it scattered the night and made the day worth living" F. Scott Fitzgerald

Offline Machiavelli

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Re: The Official TBR Silliness Thread
« Reply #166 on: June 05, 2014, 04:55:30 pm »
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Offline Machiavelli

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Re: The Official TBR Silliness Thread
« Reply #167 on: June 05, 2014, 11:13:04 pm »
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Offline Machiavelli

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Re: The Official TBR Silliness Thread
« Reply #168 on: June 06, 2014, 04:21:58 pm »
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Offline Machiavelli

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Re: The Official TBR Silliness Thread
« Reply #169 on: June 06, 2014, 04:36:01 pm »
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Offline Machiavelli

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Re: The Official TBR Silliness Thread
« Reply #170 on: June 06, 2014, 07:12:04 pm »
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Offline Machiavelli

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Re: The Official TBR Silliness Thread
« Reply #171 on: June 09, 2014, 04:29:36 pm »
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Offline Machiavelli

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Re: The Official TBR Silliness Thread
« Reply #172 on: June 10, 2014, 06:38:21 pm »
A woman was at the bar waiting for a beer when a butt-ugly big old redneck came up behind her and slapped her on the butt.

He said, "Hey sexy, how about giving me your number."

She looked at him and said, "Have you got a pen?"

His eyes lit up and he said, "I sure do!"

She said, "Well, you better get back into it, before the farmer notices you're missing."
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Offline Machiavelli

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Re: The Official TBR Silliness Thread
« Reply #173 on: June 10, 2014, 06:45:20 pm »
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Offline DCPatriot

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Re: The Official TBR Silliness Thread
« Reply #174 on: June 10, 2014, 07:08:35 pm »
Quote from: Machiavelli on June 10, 2014, 06:45:20 pm


aka feline torture.  {the neck inhibitor }

That ain't right!     :laugh:
« Last Edit: June 10, 2014, 07:09:19 pm by DCPatriot »
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"It aint what you don't know that kills you.  It's what you know that aint so!" ...Theodore Sturgeon

"Journalism is about covering the news.  With a pillow.  Until it stops moving."    - David Burge (Iowahawk)

"It was only a sunny smile, and little it cost in the giving, but like morning light it scattered the night and made the day worth living" F. Scott Fitzgerald
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