Author Topic: Today's Toons 5/2/11  (Read 4628 times)

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Online pookie18

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Today's Toons 5/2/11
« on: May 02, 2011, 08:33:43 am »

 

Click below for The Donald's mentor:
 

 


 


 


 


 


 


 


 


 


 


 


 


 

Click below for related video:
 



 


 


 


 


 


 


 


 


 


 


 


 


 


 


 


 


 

Click below for Baloo's site:
 

 


 


 


 


 


 


 


 


 


 

Simon says, "click!"
 



 


 


 


 


 


 

This Thread Brought To You By The Letter P:
 

 
 
 
In Case You Missed It Dept.:
 

NBC ended the new "Paul Reiser Show" after only 2 weeks because its ratings were so bad. Don't you wish presidential politics could work like that?
 
 
 
During a stop in Nevada, President Obama said he'll ask Eric Holder to "root out any cases of fraud or manipulation in the oil markets". That should work. Holder's great at the rooting, it's just the prosecuting that seems to give him troubles.  
 
 
 
During a speech in Nevada, Obama mentioned that he wants his fleet of presidential cars to be "100 percent alternative-fuel". Now he just needs to figure out how to get those things to run on snake oil.  
 
 
 
China is considering reducing its Treasury Bond holdings from $3 trillion down to $1 trillion. Hopefully this example will clarify for President Obama what the word "cut" means.  
 
 
 
The Iranian government now says that its computer systems are suffering a major attack from yet another mysterious computer virus. Two ways to fix this, guys: clean up your computers, or clean up your act.  
 
 
 
Despite rising gas prices, the EPA is refusing to grant permits to Shell Oil to drill off the coast of Alaska. Ya know, if we're not going to use Alaska, why not just return it and see if Russia will give us our $7 million back.  
 

White House Press Secretary Jay Carney said, "I don't think when somebody sticks the credit card in the pump or pays a cashier the cash for a tank of gas that they're thinking about an election in 2012." Well, they're certainly not thinking about a RE-election.  
 
 
 
Katie Couric said she's leaving the CBS Evening News because she wants to "engage in more multi-dimensional storytelling." Hey, if that means I gotta wear those goofy glasses, I'm not watching.  
 
 
 
During the morning briefing, White House Press Secretary Jay Carney was peppered with a barrage of birth certificate questions. Forget that. I'm still waiting to see Obama's 2011 budget.  
 
 
 
A Labor Studies professor at UM-Kansas City was caught on video telling students that union violence was "an appropriate tactic." So's firing bad teachers.  
 
 
 
President Obama described the discussion over his birth certificate as "sideshows and carnival barkers". Doesn't he have a Czar for that?  
 
 
 
In Arizona, a man was rescued after he accidentally drove his car off the South Rim into the Grand Canyon. Personally, I think he stole the idea from Obama's budget plan.  
 
 
 
During Obama's birth certificate speech, he said "we do not have time for this kind of silliness". That's right, time to focus on serious issues, like taping an appearance on Oprah's show.  
 
 
 
In 2008, Nancy Pelosi blamed high gas prices on "oil men in the White House". So when's she gonna start blaming J. D. Barackefeller?  
 
 
 
Democrat Congressman Dan Boren said that Obama is "uninformed about the oil and gas industry." Nah. He already knows everything he needs to know - they have money he hasn't taxed away yet.  
 
 
 
MSNBC's Eliot Spitzer said "I don't think there is any such thing as objectivity." Looks like MSNBC may have just found a replacement for their "Lean Forward" motto.  
 
 
 
  -- Fred Thompson
 

President Obama was cheered by movie stars Thursday when he spoke at the Sony movie lot in Culver City. They desperately need his help. Next year at the Oscars they're going to do a montage of all the movie stars who were killed in the real estate crash.  
 

President Obama had a ball hosting the White House Easter Egg Roll Monday on the South Lawn. Twenty thousand children enjoyed the roll, then gathered around for story time. Some guy in a bunny suit read them the story of how Rush Limbaugh stole Christmas.  
 
 
 
President Obama blamed the oil companies Monday for the month-long spike in oil prices. However, he banned drilling in the Gulf and he devalued the dollar by printing money. Even his kids are saving their allowance money to buy gold from Glenn Beck.  
 
 
 
Teleprompter inventor Hubert Schlafly died Tuesday at age ninety-one in his home in Connecticut. He invented the device fifty years ago to help soap opera actors remember their lines. President Obama ordered U.S. flags to be lowered to half-staff, then scrolled up slowly.  
 
 
 
Daily Variety reported that Teleprompter inventor Hubert Schlafly died on Tuesday at age ninety-one. He invented the Teleprompter sixty years ago to help TV actors who couldn't remember their lines. When President Obama heard the news he was speechless.  
 
 
 
President Obama appeared before reporters Wednesday and produced a long form Hawaii birth certificate from fifty years ago. There's no doubt about the authenticity of the birth certificate. It lists his name, his birthdate and his number of Twitter followers.  
 
 
 
President Obama was ripped by carnival barkers Friday after he compared Donald Trump to them. Carnival barkers lure people to come into your store and spend their cash. Leave it to Obama to be out there belittling the one talent that can save the economy.   
 
 
 
North Korean dictator Kim Jong Il said Tuesday he supports full and open talks with South Korea in opening up trade. It's out of necessity. He made a fortune counterfeiting U.S. currency but now that it isn't worth anything he has to find another way to pay the bills.  
 
 
 
-- Argus Hamilton
 

The White House Easter Egg Roll is an opportunity from kids all over the country to come to the White House and look for the president’s birth certificate.  
 

Donald Trump is now attacking President Obama’s grades, suggesting that he was a poor student. First it was the birth certificate, and now the grades. Trump won’t be happy until he proves that Obama doesn’t exist.  
 
 
 
President Obama finally released his birth certificate because he said we can’t afford to be distracted by “carnival barkers.” Carnival barkers are now upset and say they have been offended. There goes the all-important bearded lady vote.  
 
 
 
-- Jimmy Kimmel
 

Ex-convicts prepared the eggs for the White House’s Easter Egg Roll. It’s nice to see the White House reaching out to former members of Congress.  
 

Donald Trump says he’s President Obama’s worst nightmare. That’s not true. Having to make a decision is Obama’s worst nightmare.  
 
 
 
The United States is sending its most powerful drone to Libya. That’s a long trip for Joe Biden. 
 
 
 
It’s the 75th anniversary of the introduction of Social Security checks. For the younger viewers who don’t know what a Social Security check is, you’ll never see one in your lifetime, so don’t worry about it.  
 
 
 
The man who invented the teleprompter has died at the age of 91. When President Obama heard the news, he was speechless.  
 
 
 
-- Leno
 

Katie Couric has announced that she’s leaving CBS. Insiders think she may have been involved in dog-fighting.  
 

Don’t worry about Katie. She’s the new voice of the Aflac duck.   
 
 
 
-- Letterman
 

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Asked by host Greta Van Susteren about the news of Couric’s departure, Palin said: “Yea, I think I read that in a newspaper”   
 


Oceander

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Re: Today's Toons 5/2/11
« Reply #1 on: May 02, 2011, 11:15:31 am »
Yeah pookie!

I hope that iOwntheworld doesn't take (too much) offense, but I felt that the King Putt image needed a little additional editorial comment:


Offline illeagle

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Re: Today's Toons 5/2/11
« Reply #2 on: May 02, 2011, 11:29:16 am »
Thank you & good morning Pookie...April showers have been extended into May! 10294
“All that is necessary for evil to triumph is for good men to do nothing.”
Edmund Burke

 “Unless the Lord builds the house, its builders labor in vain." Psalm 127:1

Offline Davidfxs

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Re: Today's Toons 5/2/11
« Reply #3 on: May 02, 2011, 11:51:25 am »
Thank you Pookie
Liberals are like Slinkies, Good for nothing really. But they bring a smile to your face when you push them down a flight of Stairs.

Online pookie18

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Re: Today's Toons 5/2/11
« Reply #4 on: May 02, 2011, 02:33:45 pm »
Yeah pookie!

I hope that iOwntheworld doesn't take (too much) offense, but I felt that the King Putt image needed a little additional editorial comment:


Mornin', Oceander! Thanks...will rerun on Wed.

Online pookie18

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Re: Today's Toons 5/2/11
« Reply #5 on: May 02, 2011, 02:34:42 pm »
Thank you & good morning Pookie...April showers have been extended into May! 10294

Mornin' & you're welcome, Illeagle!

Online pookie18

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Re: Today's Toons 5/2/11
« Reply #6 on: May 02, 2011, 02:35:31 pm »
Thank you Pookie

My pleasure, David!

Offline ricebug

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Re: Today's Toons 5/2/11
« Reply #7 on: May 02, 2011, 08:40:31 pm »
G'day, Pookie!!!
« Last Edit: May 02, 2011, 08:58:28 pm by pookie18 »

Online pookie18

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Re: Today's Toons 5/2/11
« Reply #8 on: May 02, 2011, 08:58:55 pm »