Today's Toons 11/6/17

[pookie18]

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
Click below for Tony's toons:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
This Thread Brought To You By The Letter T:

(Thank you, Polly Ticks)
 
In Case You Missed It Dept.:
 
The National Archives was ordered to release the secret CIA and FBI investigation report into JFK's assassination on Thursday. One thing we know now. If Jack Kennedy hadn't been killed by bullets fired from Lee Harvey Oswald's rifle in 1963, he'd have died in a hail of Me Too's in 2017.
 
Harvey Weinstein was kicked out of the Academy of Motion Pictures and also evicted from the Producers Guild due to the dozens of accusations by actresses against him for sexual assault. In addition, his condition is deteriorating rapidly at sex rehab. Last night he took a turn for the nurse.
 
Hillary Clinton was found to have paid for a Russian dossier that said Trump paid hookers to urinate on him in a Moscow hotel room. The salacious details were first posted on Buzz Feed's website, but a broadcast deal has been struck with HBO to verify the dossier. It'll air on Pee-per-View.
 
Former president George HW Bush apologized Friday after two Hollywood actresses claimed he sexually fondled them from his wheelchair and talked dirty to them as they posed for a group photo together. So now we know what the HW stands for in his name. It stands for Harvey Weinstein.
 
Christ Church in Virginia took down plaques honoring church members George Washington and Robert E. Lee Friday. They said the plaques might make some churchgoers feel uncomfortable. The U.S. would have the greatest economy in the history of the world if only being offended paid better.
 
Kathy Griffin ripped Anderson Cooper Thursday for not backing her when CNN fired her last June. She has no support. Republicans are angry at Kathy because she posted a photo of herself holding up a severed head of President Trump, and Democrats are angry at her because it wasn't real.
 
The National Archive release of all FBI and CIA material on the JFK assassination revealed Jack's obsession with the Soviet Union's involvement in Cuba. In the Cuban Missile Crisis, Jack set up a secret back channel to Moscow through Soviet spy Georgi Bolshakov, which saved the world from nuclear war. Today, Jack would be impeached by his own party for colluding with the Russians.
 
Robert Mueller's indictment of Paul Manafort prompted the resignation of Tony Podesta from a huge Democratic lobbying firm on Monday. That means this investigation could lead to either Trump or Hillary, or both. At every gym in Washington, rotating witch hunts could be the new cardio.
 
Kevin Spacey was accused of sexually assaulting an underage male actor twenty years ago by the actor Monday. Kevin announced that he's gay, hoping that'd stop the criticism. On the slim chance that it might work, Bill Cosby and Harvey Weinstein came out and announced they're straight.
 
The Pentagon reported that Raqqa, the capital city of ISIS in Syria, has finally been cleared of the terrorists and after the fall of Mosul they have no territory left. They're not a bright bunch. How smart can suicide bombers be who expect to enjoy seventy-two virgins after blowing their penises off?
 
The Comedy Store celebrated our forty-fifth anniversary with a spectacular show of stand-ups Saturday. Backstage I helped my pal Yakov Smirnov write a joke making fun of CNN's mania to get Trump. The joke must've killed because now I'm under investigation for colluding with the Russians.
 
President Trump jumped on the New York terrorist attack to demand an end to the Diversity Visa Immigration Program that admitted the attacker. Democrats are sudden converts to the idea of extreme vetting. They believe our country needs to make it far more difficult to become president.
 
-- Argus Hamilton
 
 

[pookie18]

Among others, Antonin Scalia has been nominated for the NJ Hall Of Fame. Here's the voting link:

https://njhalloffame.org/2017-nominees/

[Polly Ticks]

Thanks, Pookie.

I'm not from NJ, but I voted anyway.

[Smokin Joe]

Thanks, pookie!

[pookie18]

Thanks, Pookie.

I'm not from NJ, but I voted anyway.

You're welcome, Polly Ticks! Yeah, it didn't say anything about having a NJ residence...tx

[pookie18]

Thanks, pookie!

My pleasure, Smokin Joe!

[verga]

Nice Job Pookie, sorry I am late.

[pookie18]

Nice Job Pookie, sorry I am late.

Thanks, Verga! There's no lateness in toons class...

[Cyber Liberty]

Thanks for the Toons, Pookie!!!  I really enjoy the Monday Vargus extra!

[pookie18]

Thanks for the Toons, Pookie!!!  I really enjoy the Monday Vargus extra!

You're welcome, as always, @Cyber Liberty! If it weren't for Argus, there'd be no Monday jokes; rarely nowadays do I find anything funny from the late night "comedians"...