Author Topic: Today's Toons 5/1/17  (Read 5170 times)

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Online pookie18

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Today's Toons 5/1/17
« on: May 01, 2017, 08:11:05 am »

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 
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This Thread Brought To You By The Letter T:

(Thank you, Polly Ticks)
 
In Case You Missed It Dept.:
 
President Trump sent a Naval armada to the Korean peninsula this weekend despite Kim Jung Un's threats to attack California with missiles if he does. It's hilarious. Nothing should frighten the Democratic West Coast like a GOP president on the East Coast willing to call North Korea's bluff.
 
President Trump could accurately announce the Nimitz group was headed for North Korea on Thursday. Last week he announced prematurely a naval force was heading to North Korea when in fact it was headed to Pearl Harbor. Hawaii's judge was about to say just kidding about the travel ban.
 
Barack Obama was photographed partying aboard Hollywood producer David Geffen's yacht in French Polynesia Friday as his extended overseas vacation continued. It was good to see him smiling, laughing and having a fun time. That may change when he tries to re-enter the United States.
 
L.A. Mayor Eric Garcetti vowed to bind other sanctuary cities in a network of illegal immigration protectors Friday. It never ends. They say that America is a racist, sexist, homophobic, xenophobic white man's club and that it's wrong to stop immigrants from coming here to enjoy its many blessings.
 
New York City Mayor Bill de Blasio stunned consumers Friday by proposing a local city-wide tax that would raise the price of cigarettes to thirteen dollars a pack. It's historic. It has taken the Democrats thirty years, but they have finally figured out a way to make crack cost-effective.
 
French presidential candidate Marine Le Pen shocked the political world Sunday by making it into the final election in two weeks based upon her promise to deport all terrorists from the country. The terrorists are easy to spot. They're the only guys in France who would rather die than surrender.
 
French presidential candidate Emmanuel Mancon was reported Tuesday to have met his wife when he was a fifteen-year-old student and she was his forty-year-old teacher. They then began an affair. If elected, his fellow countryman Roman Polanski should be a shoo-in for Education Secretary.
 
Donald Trump's first hundred days has produced dividends for both parties. Republicans can be glad because it's resulted in tighter U.S. borders and a booming stock market. Democrats can be glad because it's made superstars out of Alec Baldwin and Melissa McCarthy on Saturday Night Live.
 
Democratic Senator Chuck Schumer vowed to shut down the U.S. government over funding for the Mexican border wall. It doesn't scare Baby Boomers. Since 1976, the federal government has been shut down sixteen times, the longest period being the four years that Jimmy Carter was president.
 
Democrats vowed to block Trump's tax cut, saying it'll cause a huge budget deficit. Democrats now hate Russia, Democrats back states' rights over sanctuary cities, and now Democrats want a balanced budget. Trump has everyone so crazy he's turned perfectly good Democrats into Republicans.
 
Kim Jung Un said Tuesday he can hit the United States with a Taepo-dong missile. However, for Kim's missile to reach the U.S. would require a Taepo-dong-Two missile and so far he's only tested a Taepo-dong-One missile. Isn't it just like a megalomaniac to exaggerate the size of his dong?
 
Homeland Security asserted Monday that a wall with Mexico will help to block terrorists from entering the U.S. Many fear they're already here and blending into the population. In Los Angeles bookstores, the two top-selling books in Arabic are the Koran and How to Speak Spanish like a Native.
 
Caitlyn Jenner made the interview rounds this week with Diane Sawyer on ABC and Tucker Carlson on Fox to promote her new book, My Secret Life. In the interviews, Caitlyn said she might run for public office. However she might be the easiest candidate in history to be labeled a flip-flopper.
 
-- Argus Hamilton
 
 

Offline Smokin Joe

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Re: Today's Toons 5/1/17
« Reply #1 on: May 01, 2017, 08:30:49 am »
Thanks, pookie!
How God must weep at humans' folly! Stand fast! God knows what he is doing!
Seventeen Techniques for Truth Suppression

Of all tyrannies, a tyranny sincerely exercised for the good of its victims may be the most oppressive. It would be better to live under robber barons than under omnipotent moral busybodies. The robber baron's cruelty may sometimes sleep, his cupidity may at some point be satiated; but those who torment us for our own good will torment us without end for they do so with the approval of their own conscience.

C S Lewis

Online pookie18

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Re: Today's Toons 5/1/17
« Reply #2 on: May 01, 2017, 08:57:34 am »
Thanks, pookie!

You're welcome, Smokin Joe!

Offline Davidfxs

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Re: Today's Toons 5/1/17
« Reply #3 on: May 01, 2017, 11:21:55 am »
Thank you Pookie
Liberals are like Slinkies, Good for nothing really. But they bring a smile to your face when you push them down a flight of Stairs.

Offline Polly Ticks

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Re: Today's Toons 5/1/17
« Reply #4 on: May 01, 2017, 11:32:49 am »
Thanks, Pookie.



Love is the most important thing in the world, but baseball is pretty good, too. -Yogi Berra

Online pookie18

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Re: Today's Toons 5/1/17
« Reply #5 on: May 01, 2017, 02:39:01 pm »
Thank you Pookie

My pleasure, David!

Online pookie18

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Re: Today's Toons 5/1/17
« Reply #6 on: May 01, 2017, 02:39:38 pm »
Thanks, Pookie.

You're welcome, as always, Polly Ticks!