Author Topic: ***THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS FOR 10/07***  (Read 5926 times)

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Offline L9teen

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***THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS FOR 10/07***
« on: October 07, 2016, 12:59:23 pm »
And now, for some random silliness...

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Headline Fail

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SMOD 2016



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WH PRESS SECRETARY ‏@weknowwhatsbest

FEMA is flying Tim Kaine to Florida where Hurricane Matthew will make landfall to see if he can interrupt it.

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It's good to be prepared


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Hold my beer....


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Anyone up for a swim?


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Sadly, the person who posted this pic (above), and this comment on FB, was serious:
Dear parents, please teach your annoying little sh**s to be sensitive to others. Halloween should be fun for everyone and no one should be confronted with costumes that are comprised of microagressions and cultural appropriation. If your children trigger others by knocking on their door and dehumanizing them, expect legal action. Please share with your friends to make Halloween more tolerant. We encourage you to print this out and put it on your door as a warning. Happy Samhain! So mote it be!

Offline L9teen

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Re: ***THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS FOR 10/07***
« Reply #1 on: October 07, 2016, 01:03:20 pm »





PINGALING LIST – Let me know if you want on or off!! 

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Offline jmyrlefuller

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Re: ***THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS FOR 10/07***
« Reply #2 on: October 07, 2016, 01:21:09 pm »
“ Yesterday, a weather reading from Nassau in the Bahamas, a city where Hurricane Matthew made a direct hit, showed the immense power of the storm: sustained winds of 119 mph, and gusts of over 140.

The report also noted it was 82 degrees, but with the heat index, it feels like 90. I'm pretty sure at 119 mph, 82 doesn't feel like 90—it feels more like ‘what the ____ was I thinking coming outside in this?!’ „
New profile picture in honor of Public Domain Day 2024

Offline Sanguine

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Re: ***THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS FOR 10/07***
« Reply #3 on: October 07, 2016, 01:26:26 pm »
Happy Friday!

Offline RoosGirl

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Re: ***THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS FOR 10/07***
« Reply #4 on: October 07, 2016, 01:31:46 pm »
Thank goodness the little one only wants to be a robot this year.  We sure wouldn't want to offend anyone by having fun.  :tongue2:

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For unvaccinated, we are looking at a winter of severe illness and death — if you’re unvaccinated — for themselves, their families, and the hospitals they’ll soon overwhelm. Sloe Joe Biteme 12/16
I will NOT comply.
 
Castillo del Cyber Autonomous Zone ~~~~~>                          :dontfeed:

Offline Resp3

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Re: ***THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS FOR 10/07***
« Reply #6 on: October 07, 2016, 01:44:14 pm »
Friday Silliness can't get any more silly than the current TBR threads....

Libs Gone Insane: ‘We Should Consider Eating Our Own Poop’                           
« on: Today at 08:10:00 AM »

Fox News Host To Floridians In Hurricane Matthew’s Path ‘You and Everyone You Know Are Dead, and Your Kids Die, Too.’                            
« on: October 06, 2016, 07:27:02 PM »

Trump says he insulted women 'for the purpose of entertainment'                           
« on: October 06, 2016, 08:30:02 AM »

Even a US Supreme Court Justice just questioned whether Kim Kardashian was really robbed                           
« on: October 06, 2016, 03:39:43 PM »



Offline Sanguine

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Offline bolobaby

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Re: ***THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS FOR 10/07***
« Reply #8 on: October 07, 2016, 02:12:59 pm »
I just posted this on another thread.

"In yo' face, Kanye!"

How to lose credibility while posting:
1. Trump is never wrong.
2. Default to the most puerile emoticon you can find. This is especially useful when you can't win an argument on merits.
3. Be falsely ingratiating, completely but politely dismissive without talking to the points, and bring up Hillary whenever the conversation is really about conservatism.
4. When all else fails, remember rule #1 and #2. Emoticons are like the poor man's tweet!

Offline bolobaby

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Re: ***THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS FOR 10/07***
« Reply #9 on: October 07, 2016, 02:19:29 pm »
How to lose credibility while posting:
1. Trump is never wrong.
2. Default to the most puerile emoticon you can find. This is especially useful when you can't win an argument on merits.
3. Be falsely ingratiating, completely but politely dismissive without talking to the points, and bring up Hillary whenever the conversation is really about conservatism.
4. When all else fails, remember rule #1 and #2. Emoticons are like the poor man's tweet!

Offline Idaho_Cowboy

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Re: ***THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS FOR 10/07***
« Reply #10 on: October 07, 2016, 03:07:25 pm »
Thank goodness the little one only wants to be a robot this year.  We sure wouldn't want to offend anyone by having fun.  :tongue2:
How dare anyone micoagress against sentient robots by appropriating sentient robot culture. Data and The doctor from Star Trek are not amused, but then again, they never are. :tongue2:
“The way I see it, every time a man gets up in the morning he starts his life over. Sure, the bills are there to pay, and the job is there to do, but you don't have to stay in a pattern. You can always start over, saddle a fresh horse and take another trail.” ― Louis L'Amour


Offline L9teen

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Re: ***THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS FOR 10/07***
« Reply #12 on: October 07, 2016, 04:06:42 pm »
Let the chips fall where they may

But unfortunately, not one, not two, not even FIVE different snacks refused to obey the laws of gravity and now you’re SOL and out of about $5.
And still no snack.

Online bigheadfred

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Re: ***THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS FOR 10/07***
« Reply #13 on: October 07, 2016, 05:34:55 pm »
Thank goodness the little one only wants to be a robot this year.  We sure wouldn't want to offend anyone by having fun.  :tongue2:

Not too many left to offend going as a liberal... :patriot:
She asked me name my foe then. I said the need within some men to fight and kill their brothers without thought of Love or God. Ken Hensley

Offline RoosGirl

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Re: ***THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS FOR 10/07***
« Reply #14 on: October 07, 2016, 06:47:36 pm »
Not too many left to offend going as a liberal... :patriot:

Calling my boy a liberal is fighting words. I'm darn near tempted to report you to a mod. ;)

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Re: ***THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS FOR 10/07***
« Reply #15 on: October 07, 2016, 06:55:55 pm »
Calling my boy a liberal is fighting words. I'm darn near tempted to report you to a mod. ;)

uhohibestshutupcausecallingonthejackbootssoundslikesomethingaliberalwoulddo  :tongue2: :tongue2:

Resist that temptation.  :silly: Resist much.

I joke that my big head is solid bone but it may be the result of my callusness showing.  ****slapping
She asked me name my foe then. I said the need within some men to fight and kill their brothers without thought of Love or God. Ken Hensley

Offline L9teen

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Re: ***THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS FOR 10/07***
« Reply #16 on: October 07, 2016, 07:12:09 pm »
 Scott Butler@carlscottbutler   8m8 minutes ago

Thanks to @vanillaice  every time someone covering #hurricanematthew mentions A1A I yell out Beach Front Avenue #gowhiteboygowhiteboygo
 :silly: :silly:

Offline Weird Tolkienish Figure

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Re: ***THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS FOR 10/07***
« Reply #17 on: October 07, 2016, 07:38:33 pm »

Offline Weird Tolkienish Figure

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Re: ***THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS FOR 10/07***
« Reply #18 on: October 07, 2016, 07:41:59 pm »

Online Cyber Liberty

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Re: ***THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS FOR 10/07***
« Reply #19 on: October 07, 2016, 08:04:06 pm »
Calling my boy a liberal is fighting words. I'm darn near tempted to report you to a mod. ;)

I was just reading on another thread somebody insisting calling somebody a liberal is not "name calling."  Let's see how that plays when somebody gets butthurt and reports it to the Mods.
For unvaccinated, we are looking at a winter of severe illness and death — if you’re unvaccinated — for themselves, their families, and the hospitals they’ll soon overwhelm. Sloe Joe Biteme 12/16
I will NOT comply.
 
Castillo del Cyber Autonomous Zone ~~~~~>                          :dontfeed:

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Re: ***THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS FOR 10/07***
« Reply #20 on: October 07, 2016, 08:06:37 pm »
uhohibestshutupcausecallingonthejackbootssoundslikesomethingaliberalwoulddo  :tongue2: :tongue2:

Resist that temptation.  :silly: Resist much.

I joke that my big head is solid bone but it may be the result of my callusness showing.  ****slapping

So now we're calling the Moderators "Jackboots?"  It's a good thing they almost never come on this thread. 

(Except for that one time I posted the lyrics to "It's a Small World."  That was hell to pay.)
For unvaccinated, we are looking at a winter of severe illness and death — if you’re unvaccinated — for themselves, their families, and the hospitals they’ll soon overwhelm. Sloe Joe Biteme 12/16
I will NOT comply.
 
Castillo del Cyber Autonomous Zone ~~~~~>                          :dontfeed:

Offline Idaho_Cowboy

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Re: ***THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS FOR 10/07***
« Reply #21 on: October 07, 2016, 09:10:05 pm »
So now we're calling the Moderators "Jackboots?"  It's a good thing they almost never come on this thread. 

(Except for that one time I posted the lyrics to "It's a Small World."  That was hell to pay.)
It's a small world after all. It's a small world after all.  :tongue2:

Is it still okay to make fun of Blonds?

A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were all lost in the desert. They found a lamp and rubbed it. A genie popped out and granted them each one wish. The redhead wished to be back home. Poof! She was back home. The brunette wished to be at home with her family. Poof! She was back home with her family. The blonde said, "Awwww, I wish my friends were here."

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Blonde: "What does IDK stand for?"
Brunette: "I don’t know."
Blonde: "OMG, nobody does!"

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Q: Why can't a blonde dial 911?
A: She can't find the eleven.

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A guy took his blonde girlfriend to her first football game. They had great seats right behind their team's bench. After the game, he asked her how she liked the experience. "Oh, I really liked it," she replied, "especially the tight pants and all the big muscles, but I just couldn't understand why they were killing each other over 25 cents." Dumbfounded, her date asked, "What do you mean?" "Well, they flipped a coin, one team got it, and then for the rest of the game, all they kept screaming was, 'Get the quarterback! Get the quarterback!' I'm like, hello? It's only 25 cents!"

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There was a blonde who just got sick and tired of all the blonde jokes. One evening, she went home and memorized all the state capitals. Back in the office the next day, some guy started telling a dumb blonde joke. She interrupted him with a shrill announcement, "I've had it up to here with these blonde jokes. I want you to know that this blonde went home last night and did something probably none of you could do. I memorized all the state capitals." One of the guys, of course, said, "I don't believe you. What is the capital of Nevada?" "N," she answered.

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A guy was driving in a car with a blonde. He told her to stick her head out the window and see if the blinker worked. She stuck her head out and said, "Yes, No, Yes, No, Yes..."

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There are 11 people hanging onto a rope that comes down from an airplane. 10 of them are blonde, and one is a brunette. They all decide that one person should get off because if they don't, the rope will break and everyone will die. No one can decide who should go, so finally the brunette delivers a very touching speech, ending with the words, "I'll get off." The blondes, all moved by the brunette's speech, start clapping. Problem solved.


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A blind guy on a bar stool shouts to the bartender, "Wanna hear a blonde joke?" In a hushed voice, the guy next to him says, “Before you tell that joke, you should know something. Our bartender is blonde, the bouncer is blonde. I’m a six foot tall, 200 lb black belt. The guy sitting next to me is six foot two, weighs 225, and he’s a rugby player. The fella to your right is six foot five, pushing 300, and he’s a wrestler. Each one of us is blonde. Think about it, Mister. Do you still wanna tell that joke?" The blind guy says, “Nah, not if I’m gonna have to explain it five times."

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A blonde and a redhead have a ranch. They have just lost their bull. The women need to buy another, but only have $500. The redhead tells the blonde, "I will go to the market and see if I can find one for under that amount. If I can, I will send you a telegram." She goes to the market and finds one for $499. Having only one dollar left, she goes to the telegraph office and finds out that it costs one dollar per word. She is stumped on how to tell the blonde to bring the truck and trailer. Finally, she tells the telegraph operator to send the word "comfortable." Skeptical, the operator asks, "How will she know to come with the trailer from just that word?" The redhead replies, "She's a blonde so she reads slow: 'Come for ta bull.'"

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A blonde really got tired of all blonde jokes and decided to hang herself in the bathroom. As she locked the door, she yelled at her husband, "I'm hanging myself because I'm tired of jokes about us blondes being stupid!" Her husband broke into the bathroom and saw his wife with a rope tied on her toe. The husband said, "I thought you were hanging yourself." She said, "Yes, I am!" The husband replied, "Usually when people hang themselves, they tie the rope around their neck, so why is yours tied on your toe?" She said, "I tried that, but I couldn't breathe."

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A husband and wife were driving through Louisiana. As they approached Natchitoches, they started arguing about the pronunciation of the town. They argued back and forth, then they stopped for lunch. At the counter, the husband asked the blonde waitress, "Before we order, could you please settle an argument for us? Would you please pronounce where we are very slowly?" She leaned over the counter and said, "Burrr-gerrr Kiiing."

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"May I take your order?" the blonde waitress asked. "Yes, how do you prepare your chickens?" "Nothing special sir," she replied, "we just tell them straight out that theyre going to die."

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Tired of constant blonde jokes, a blonde dyes her hair brown. She then goes for a drive in the country and sees a shepherd herding his sheep across the road.

"Hey, shepherd, if I guess how many sheep are here, can I keep one?"

The shepherd is puzzled but agrees. She blurts out "352!"

He is stunned but keeps his word and allows her to pick a sheep.

"I'll take this one," she says proudly. "It's the cutest!"

"Hey lady," says the shepherd, "If I guess your real hair color, can I have my dog back?"

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A blonde woman, a priest, a pilot, and a high schooler are all on a crashing plane. There are only enough parachutes to save three of them, and the pilot is the first to jump out. He grabs a parachute and says, "I'm a pilot! People need me to fly planes!" and then jumps out. The blonde is next to jump out. She grabs a parachute and says, "My hair won't look pretty if I'm dead!" and then jumps out. The priest then says to the high schooler, "Son, I've lived my life to its fullest and I am surely ready to join God in heaven." The high schooler then hands a parachute to the priest and puts another parachute on himself. The priest is shocked and asks the high schooler, "Oh Lord! Where did you find this extra parachute?" The high schooler replies, "The blonde lady took my backpack!"

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A blonde walks into a shoe store and tries on a pair of shoes. "How do they feel?" asks the salesclerk. "Well, they feel a bit tight," replies the blonde. The assistant promptly bends down and has a look at the shoes and the blonde’s feet. "Try pulling the tongue out," offers the clerk. “Nath, theyth sthill feelth a bith tighth,” the blonde replies.

-----------------------


A blonde is wearing a pair of socks that don't match, one is red and the other is white. Her friend sees her out and says, "You know your socks don't match, right? You're wearing one red sock and one white sock." The blonde responds, "That's so weird! I have another pair just like it in my drawer at home."

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A blonde sees a thermos in a store. She asks a clerk, "What is that and what's it for?" The clerk answers, "It's a thermos that keeps hot things hot and cold things cold." The blonde says, "I'll take it." When she gets to work, her blonde boss asks, "What is that?" The blonde worker says, "It's a thermos. It keeps cold things cold and hot things hot." "Whatcha got in it?" "A cup of coffee and a Popsicle."

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A blonde and a brunette are watching a TV show. The brunette bets the blonde $10 that the man in the episode would jump off a bridge. The man jumps off the bridge and blonde pays the the brunette $10. The brunette feels guilty because she had already seen the episode, so she confesses to the blonde. The blonde says, "I've seen it too, but I didn't think he would jump again."

----------------

One day, a blonde went to the doctor with both sides of her face burned. The doctor asked, "What happened?" The blonde said, "Well, I was ironing my husband's shirt until the phone rang. I picked it up and half my face was burnt!" The doctor replied, "What about the other half?" The blonde answered, "They called back."

---------------

A blond girl was at the store, and just as she was heading for her car, someone stole it. The policemen asked, "Did you see the guy that did it?" She said, "No, but I got the license plate."

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One blonde was on one side of the river and there was another blonde on the other side of the river. One blonde yells to the other blonde, "How do you get to the other side?" and the other blonde yells back, "You are on the other side!"

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A blonde approaches a stranger and asks what time it is. The stranger says, "11:45." The blonde says, "Really? That's so weird. Every time I ask that question, I get a different answer."

----------------

Two blondes were shopping at the mall. When they were done, they went out to their car, an awesome leather-interior convertible, but they realized they had locked the keys in the car. So they both kind of stood there and thought for a while. Then one of the girls had the bright idea to try to open the car with a coat hanger, so she started fiddling with the lock. The other blonde looked up at the sky, became very worried, and pleaded, "Hurry, hurry! It's going to rain and we left the top down!"
« Last Edit: October 07, 2016, 09:12:00 pm by Idaho_Cowboy »
“The way I see it, every time a man gets up in the morning he starts his life over. Sure, the bills are there to pay, and the job is there to do, but you don't have to stay in a pattern. You can always start over, saddle a fresh horse and take another trail.” ― Louis L'Amour

Online bigheadfred

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Re: ***THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS FOR 10/07***
« Reply #22 on: October 07, 2016, 09:13:44 pm »


LOL One of the local radio stations has No Nickelback Fridays.
She asked me name my foe then. I said the need within some men to fight and kill their brothers without thought of Love or God. Ken Hensley

Online bigheadfred

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She asked me name my foe then. I said the need within some men to fight and kill their brothers without thought of Love or God. Ken Hensley

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Re: ***THE OFFICIAL FRIDAY SILLINESS FOR 10/07***
« Reply #24 on: October 07, 2016, 09:46:01 pm »
It's a small world after all. It's a small world after all.  :tongue2:

Is it still okay to make fun of Blonds?


I posted the WHOLE SONG...

Sure about the blonde jokes!  I'm a blonde guy, and I thought I had heard (and told) them all, but there were some in there that were new to me.
For unvaccinated, we are looking at a winter of severe illness and death — if you’re unvaccinated — for themselves, their families, and the hospitals they’ll soon overwhelm. Sloe Joe Biteme 12/16
I will NOT comply.
 
Castillo del Cyber Autonomous Zone ~~~~~>                          :dontfeed: