If I supported Trump...
...I would have to spend the primary complaining about the GOPe, the establishment, and praise Trump for being an outsider. During the general, I would have to tell everyone to join the establishment and support Trump or forever be irrelevant outsiders.
If I supported Trump...
...I would have to complain about Mitch McConnell and John Boehner because they were "RINOs." I would then have to help the biggest RINO in history win the primary.
If I supported Trump...
...I would have to entrust our massive budget deficit and debt to a businessman who operates on extreme leverage, has declared bankruptcy multiple times, and has repeatedly stiffed the little guy in his business dealings.
If I supported Trump...
...I would have to get used to policy positions changing on a dime. I would back Trump in the primary because I would have convinced myself that "he was the only one to ever bring up a wall!" Later, when Trump backtracks on his hard line regarding immigration, I can always say, "But Hillary!" Speaking of which...
If I supported Trump...
...I would have to vilify Hillary to the point where Trump could do many of the same things Hillary has done - he could donate to Hillary, support Hillary, vote for Hillary, be friends with Hillary - but not being Hillary would be enough to trust him.
If I supported Trump...
...I would have to be ready to call him "the next Reagan," while he never acts in any way similar to Reagan. Whereas Reagan acted with unflappable class, I would have to compare him to this legendary politician when he tweets out insults akin to a high school sophomore.
If I supported Trump...
...I would have to support a candidate who the majority of conservatives did not support in the primary. I would have to be brash towards the voters he would need to eventually win, calling them names, threatening them, and even telling them I didn't need them. Despite this, I would never, ever stop trying to convince them that they should jump off the bridge with me in the general election, even though I keep telling them how rotten they are.
If I supported Trump...
...I would attack a person as sad, dumb, and irrelevant, until such time as when they endorsed Trump, usually not in wholehearted support, but reluctantly. Then that person would be held up as a paragon to the #NeverTrump crowd - a true reason why #NeverTrump should get on the Trump train before it's too late. Act now! Supplies are limited.
If I supported Trump...
...I would have to suddenly believe polls when they say what I want them to say, and immediately discredit them when they don't. I would have to ignore the long history of polling that shows a fake Republican surge in order to lull conservative voters into complacency and fire up the left. I would also fail to recognize that Republicans need to overcome a 5 point fraud deficit in key districts, rending polls useless unless they already account for that.
If I supported Trump...
...I would have to believe he was some kind of political genius - his every move a three dimensional chess play done while blindfolded, yet still winning. I would have to believe this despite his inability to express himself beyond a 4th grade level. I would have to believe this despite him constantly making bizarre and foolish statements that later have to be backtracked and explained. Most importantly, I would have to believe this despite the fact he demonstrates glaring ignorance on a wide variety of issues whenever put on the spot.
If I supported Trump...
...I would somehow think the liberal press was being "tricked" into giving him free coverage and that there was no possible way this "free coverage" isn't going to turn against him during the final month before the election, completely ruining his chances to ever get elected president.
If I supported Trump...
...I would be obligated to attack other, more conservative politicians because they make Trump look bad. I would ignore a long history of liberalism on Trump's side to incessantly point out that, "Ted Cruz supported TPP," even though I would not really know what TPP was. I would pull this arrow from my quiver even if Ted Cruz claimed he no longer supported TPP. I would have to ignore Trump's wide range of vacillations on issues and focus on a couple of minor infractions by other conservatives to discredit them. Any similar attack on Trump for supporting things much, much more liberal than the TPP (which, oddly, the liberals *hate* because they say it cements American trade dominance), would be ignored or dismissed without further debate.
If I supported Trump...
...I would have to claim to be a conservative while I listen to Trump systematically dismantle constitutional authorities and protections with his statements. I would assail Obama for acting like a king, but pay fealty to King Trump as he repeatedly shows his eagerness to violate separation of powers through his statements.
If I supported Trump...
...I would point to his riches as proof positive of his great success. I would never, ever look at how his individual businesses perform. Carly Fiorina, though... sure, she made a ton of money as HP CEO, but she drove that business into the ground! I would have to be unable to see the difference between enriching the business principle versus running a successful business.
If I supported Trump...
...I would have to complain about crony capitalism with the Clintons, but eagerly support the crony capitalist, Trump. I would probably also have to condemn prostitution, while rewarding the Johns with my undying support.
If I supported Trump...
...I would, in short, have to be totally fine with cognitive dissonance. I'd also probably have to be medicated. And I'd have to jettison my principles in favor of populist rhetoric...
...so I'm not supporting Trump.
