Ref: the Harvard degree .....
Three high school friends meet up after a few years. Have a laugh and a joke, good meal and a few beers. They all get the urge to hit the gents at the same time.
The Harvard grad is first to finish. He walks to the sink, starts washing his hands. The Yale grad zips up, goes over to the sink and asks for the soap to wash his hands. The Aggie finishes off, zips, and starts to walk out the door.
The other two are scandalized!
"In Harvard we were always told to wash our hands after using the toilet!"
"We were taught the same in Yale!"
The Aggie looks at them, patiently. "Well, in A&M, we were taught not to piss on our hands in the first place."
Sounds about right.