Author Topic: The Five Things Hillary is Known for are Bad Things by Keith Koffler  (Read 89 times)

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The Five Things Hillary is Known for are Bad Things

by Keith Koffler on May 13, 2014, 10:46 am

Here’s why Boko Haram is awful news for Hillary: Because it adds to the list of things she is known for. AND ALL OF THEM ARE BAD.

Hillary beseeches Allah to save her from scandal.

Hillary Clinton is running on fumes. The fumes of fame. There is no other reason that people will vote for Hillary Clinton other than that she is famous. Many others share her ideas. Some state them more eloquently. But Hillary is more famous.

Hillary’s problem is that, at a certain point in the Democratic primaries, someone else will become equally famous. As will the Republican nominee. And then, people will have to look at Hillary’s record. And that’s where her problems will really begin.

Because her record, you see, in the public mind, consists of these five things:

1. Benghazi: Clinton has failed to offer an explanation for why the diplomatic post wasn’t well defended. And she hasn’t fully explained what she did the night of the attack.

2. The Russia Reset: The button was incorrectly translated, to start with. And pushing it seems to have bounced us back into the Cold War.

3. Monica Lewinsky: Sure, she was the woman wronged. But she has also allowed herself to ride to power of the coattails of one of the most degenerate men to serve as president. So she partially owns that legacy too. And voters will be reminded that Bill, even if he’s just surfing porn in the Green Room, will be back in the White House with her.

4. Hillarycare: There is, of course, no Hillarycare. It became Obamacare. It was her biggest political assignment, and she blew it. That Obama succeeded where she failed will remind voters that with Hillary, they’re settling for an also-ran. The woman Obama beat. Second best.

5. Boko Haram: Despite urging from serious people within the Obama’s own administration, Hillary’s State Department failed to label Boko Haram a terrorist outfit. There were real reasons for this based in policy, but we may never know the extent to which the political exigency of minimizing the existence of terrorists as Obama sought reelection was the true driving factor. No matter, the decision looks bad today and is irrevocably associated with Hillary.

I don’t think you can be famous for bad things and become president. Maybe, but I don’t think so.

And so, I present this wistful song written by Boko Haram during the summer of ’67, when Hillary was soaking up socialism at Wellesley, as an elegy to her and her likely failure in the 2016 campaign.

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Wait, that’s not Boko Haram. My bad.

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