Author Topic: 'Fat texts' and 'fart regulation' coming to you from the nanny state  (Read 152 times)

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Offline rangerrebew

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‘Fat Texts’ and ‘Fart Regulation’ Coming to You from the Nanny State

Posted 6 hours ag

Although it’s been going on for years, it seems lately there is an all-out assault by the nanny government to crack down on our liberties.

Nowadays, when the people say no, our rulers just do the old end around, or sleight-of-hand. They cause us to concentrate on one thing while they regulate behind our backs.

Lately it seems that even this tactic has changed and the Nanny State has begun to attack us from all sides.

Take this global warming nonsense. With every passing year, the people are coming to realize what a hoax it has been. Every poll conducted puts the climate change concern at or near the bottom of a fairly long list of worries.

The left is losing the argument and they know it. And what do we know about the left and arguments? That’s right, as they lose traction on an issue, rather than let the issue die, they become even wackier, even more unhinged, finding more devious ways to control our behavior.

And that is why I don’t think it’s a coincidence that all this nudging and shoving is being ramped up. We must keep in mind that leftists don’t stop. They may change tactics, but they will never give up.

A few examples:

First, we’ve recently heard that the makers of Al Gore’s masterpiece, An Inconvenient Truth, are pondering a sequel. Yep – we can’t get enough Al Gore. They must believe this is a way to re-create buzz about their faltering movement.

Second, a British government official wants “man-made global warming deniers” arrested and jailed. He wants to deny the “deniers” access to radio and television interviews.

Third, in the next several years, Corporate Average Fuel Economy (CAFE) standards for trucks and cars are being raised to ridiculous, possibly unachievable levels.

Fourth, the government health brainiacs are devising a plan to text fat people. Yes, the 15 members of the nanny “Dietary Guidelines Advisory Committee” are looking out for us. These 15, all pointy-headed intellectual theoreticians, don’t want us to consume trans fats, sugar, salt, soda or red meat and are developing a method to remind us, or at least the fat ones. And how will they find out who’s fat? Why, from the information provided when signing up for Obamacare. You know, the information that is supposed to be kept private.

But, you may ask, what does this have to do with global warming?


Well, it’s the “red meat” part. The leftist food police, who think red meat is unhealthy, are now being assisted by the EPA.

It seems, coincidentally, that now it’s methane emissions that will ruin the planet and kill us all. No, it’s not carbon dioxide or the ozone hole. It’s now cow farts that will evidently be our doom.

Yes, cow farts contain methane, which like everything else, is a “greenhouse gas” and must be controlled and limited, despite the fact that methane emission levels have been falling since 1990.

So the Obama brain trust has proposed a 25% reduction in methane emissions by 2020. And how does one control such a thing? By feeding cows Gas-X?

No, by thinning the herd. Not as many cows = not as many farts.

This will in turn drive up the price of beef and dairy, which means fewer people can afford it, which makes the food Nazis happy.

People fart, too, and there are 7 billion of us. Are we next?

So it all comes full circle – but I’m sure it’s just a happy coincidence and not collusion.

Oh, and one question. Some estimates put the number of the American Bison roaming our plains at around 60 million at one point. Why was cow flatulence not a problem then? Do Bison not fart?

I guess then, you could say that all those evil European buffalo hunters that virtually wiped out the bison population were environmentalists, doing it for posterity. They must have known all that added flatulence would be harmful to Mother Earth. They were real forward thinkers.

Seriously, I don’t really know if these departments meet to conspire against us or, because they all think alike, it just seems that way. I guess, at the end of the day, if they succeed in controlling all aspects of our lives, it doesn’t really matter whether they conspired or it turns out to be a Nanny State Coincidence.

America will never be destroyed from the outside. If we falter and lose our freedoms, it will be because we destroyed ourselves. Abraham Lincoln

Offline Fishrrman

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Re: 'Fat texts' and 'fart regulation' coming to you from the nanny state
« Reply #1 on: April 08, 2014, 10:15:52 PM »
I already posted about this in another thread regarding the fed's attempt to "regulate methane emissions" a few days' back.

Since there's no way to reduce the methane from an individual bovine, the only possible solution to obtain "reduced emissions" will be to reduce the number of cows.

I'm guessing that farmers who have herds over a certain number of cattle, will be forced to pay a heavy penalty per head.

Prediction: if it goes to the Supreme Court, will John Roberts declare such a penalty to be "a tax" ???  ;)

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