GOOD TIME: President Obama, center, yuks it up with Danish Prime Minister Helle Thorning- Schmidt, left, while wife Michelle Obama looks on.
Thursday, December 12, 2013
If you like your selfie, you can keep your selfie. Period.
Unless, of course, you’re Barack Obama, in which case, you better delete it from your smartphone pronto, unless you’d like to spend the next three or four months dining on hot tongue and cold shoulder.
You didn’t need a fake interpreter from an old Woody Allen movie to translate Moochelle Obama’s body language.
So there they were, Barry, British Prime Minister David Cameron and the hot-wife leader of Denmark, Helle Thorning-Schmidt, hamming it up like it was the 25th anniversary reunion of the Choom Gang. Some Krazy Kids, horsing around, waiting for high-school assembly to start.
At a memorial. Nelson Mandela’s memorial.
Obviously, none of them ever had any interaction with nuns. Back in the old days, when a single slice of pepperoni on Friday could punch you a one-way ticket to hell for all eternity, you didn’t dare step out of line at any solemn occasion, whether in church or out.
If you so much as giggled, you’d get your ears boxed, and I mean they’d be ringing. Unless Sister had gone to Mass with her ruler stashed under her habit, in which case you’d get one right upside the head, and no, you didn’t get your Miranda rights read first either.
Now times have changed. Americans are just happy their president didn’t try to start the wave.
Moochelle should understand, it’s not like Blondie is a stranger to the Obama administration. Her father-in-law is Neil Kinnock — the former British Labour Party leader.
He had a magnificent stump speech about his rise out of poverty in the Welsh coal mines. It was so moving that in 1988, then-U.S. Sen. Joe Biden lifted it verbatim, and made it his life story.
Biden was electrifying crowds across the nation, right up
until the moment Mike Dukakis’ dirty-tricks squad started slipping reporters videotapes of both speeches. And that was the end
of Joe Biden’s first presidential campaign.
So can’t you see, Moochelle, that any daughter-in-law of Neil Kinnock’s is practically a member of the extended Obama family?
Some conservatives have
already denounced the unseemliness of Obama “focusing like a laser,” to coin a phrase, on Helle’s cleavage. But don’t worry, the Barack brigade knows how to handle the slightest outbreak of lese majeste toward Dear Leader. Last night, one of the networks was
already running a piece titled “Pictures Can Lie.” Rest assured that if George Bush had been caught taking a selfie with Blondie, the story would have called, “A Picture is Worth a Thousand Words.”
Any criticism of Barack is immediately labeled racism — Comrade Chris Matthews refers to certain words in which only he can deduce racism as “dog whistles.” Recent dog whistles unearthed by MSNBC’s moonbat sleuths have included Obamacare, Chicago and apartments.
I suspect Chris Tingle will be denouncing a new dog whistle
tonight on Softball: selfie.