A 2016 sneak peek: Biden does depressingly well
By Andrew Malcolm
Posted 09:02 AM ET
The President of the United States is floundering these days, his lame duck dynasty reduced to giving nationwide addresses on what he's decided not to do. He's been quite successful getting everyone fighting, one thing he did not promise.
Watching America's standing in the world sink, other nations snub this diplomatic amateur as investments in our superior military stagnate and Obama's scandals fester while the Federal Reserve sets the country up for Jimmy Carter-scale inflation, got us to thinking:
Dear God, how much longer must we endure?
The answer is pretty depressing: About 105 million seconds or 1.76 million minutes. Hours are not much better: 29,250. Days -- 1,219 is a minor improvement, since we're 58% through. But 174 weeks feels least worst.
Then, Rasmussen Reports came out this week with a new poll of 1,000 likely voters ahead of 2016. Hey, it's never too early anymore. Then we read it.
The results show that Vice President Joe "I Say I'm from Scranton Because Pennsylvania Has More Electoral Votes Than Delaware" Biden currently defeats just about every conceivable Republican contender. At least the folks from within that stale Washington GOP crowd.
Great news for America's late-night comics. Biden's hair plugs trump Rand Paul's curls, 44%-36%. Biden beats Marco Rubio, 44%-34%. And at the moment he even tops conservative darling Ted Cruz, 43%-32%.
Biden even visited Iowa this week, a clear signal that he doesn't have enough to do. Vice presidents do have a miserable record seeking the top job in modern times. George H.W. Bush pulled it off in 1988, as a sort of third Ronald Reagan term.
But Al "Petro Dollars Cured Me of Global Warming Worries" Gore blew it in 2000. Walter Mondale was swamped in 1984. Richard Nixon's VP, Gerald Ford, lost in 1986 even after he'd inherited the presidency. In 1978, Hubert Humphrey went under to Nixon, who had lost to John Kennedy on Nixon's first Oval Office try in 1960 after two Eisenhower terms.
In 2008, Vice President Dick Cheney didn't even try. (LOL)
You'll never guess the lone Republican who defeats Biden, according to this Rasmussen survey. Well, maybe you would. It's Chris Christie, the shrinking New Jersey governor who was Obama's best bro' during last year's hurricane season.
The former federal prosecutor draws 39% to Biden's 35% among likely voters.
In match-ups against GOP candidates, Biden runs strongest among liberals, of course, and beats all Republicans among independents, except he runs even there with Christie.
But there's a problem with that Christie finding. Last month Rasmussen reported that among Republicans, Christie was the least-wanted as the 2016 nominee.
Now, here's the rest of the story three years out from the 2016 primaries: Hillary Clinton absolutely murders Joe Biden. Political homicide -- 77% to 11% among Democrats.
But, wait! There's more: Three years out from her party's 2008 primaries Clinton was also the clear favorite to win the nomination and presidency. But what difference at this point does it make?