The Briefing Room

Exclusive Content => Research => Topic started by: Wingnut on August 07, 2020, 12:01:05 PM

Title: (TxDOT) found over 200 dead crows on Highway 281 this past week, and there was concern that they may
Post by: Wingnut on August 07, 2020, 12:01:05 PM
The Texas Department of Transportation (TxDOT) found over 200 dead crows on Highway 281 this past week, and there was concern that they may have died from the Coronavirus.
A veterinary epidemiologist examined the remains of all the crows, and, to everyone's relief, confirmed the problem was NOT Coronavirus (COVID-19).

The cause of death was actually from vehicular impacts. However, during analysis it was noted that varying colors of paints appeared on the bird's beaks and claws. By analyzing these paint residues it was found that 98% of the crows had been killed by impact with trucks, while only 2% were killed by cars.

TxDOT then hired an Ornithological Behaviorist to determine if there was a cause for the disproportionate percentages of truck kills versus car kills.

The Ornithological Behaviorist quickly concluded that when crows eat road kill, they always have a look-out crow to warn of danger.

They discovered that while all the lookout crows could shout "Cah","Cah" not a single one could shout "Truck"!!!
Title: Re: (TxDOT) found over 200 dead crows on Highway 281 this past week, and there was concern that they
Post by: roamer_1 on August 07, 2020, 12:07:03 PM
The Texas Department of Transportation (TxDOT) found over 200 dead crows on Highway 281 this past week, and there was concern that they may have died from the Coronavirus.
A veterinary epidemiologist examined the remains of all the crows, and, to everyone's relief, confirmed the problem was NOT Coronavirus (COVID-19).

The cause of death was actually from vehicular impacts. However, during analysis it was noted that varying colors of paints appeared on the bird's beaks and claws. By analyzing these paint residues it was found that 98% of the crows had been killed by impact with trucks, while only 2% were killed by cars.

TxDOT then hired an Ornithological Behaviorist to determine if there was a cause for the disproportionate percentages of truck kills versus car kills.

The Ornithological Behaviorist quickly concluded that when crows eat road kill, they always have a look-out crow to warn of danger.

They discovered that while all the lookout crows could shout "Cah","Cah" not a single one could shout "Truck"!!!

 :facepalm: :boring:
Title: Re: (TxDOT) found over 200 dead crows on Highway 281 this past week, and there was concern that they
Post by: skeeter on August 07, 2020, 12:09:29 PM
Aww thanks I needed that!
Title: Re: (TxDOT) found over 200 dead crows on Highway 281 this past week, and there was concern that they
Post by: EdinVA on August 07, 2020, 12:11:37 PM
 :thud: :silly:
Title: Re: (TxDOT) found over 200 dead crows on Highway 281 this past week, and there was concern that they
Post by: Cyber Liberty on August 07, 2020, 12:25:42 PM
 :banghead:
Title: Re: (TxDOT) found over 200 dead crows on Highway 281 this past week, and there was concern that they
Post by: Bigun on August 07, 2020, 01:06:50 PM
 Reminds me of why so many of my black brothers in Vietnam bought the farm.

Every time someone yelled GET DOWN!!! They all jumped up and started doing the boogaloo!
Title: Re: (TxDOT) found over 200 dead crows on Highway 281 this past week, and there was concern that they
Post by: libertybele on August 07, 2020, 01:08:11 PM
eminds me of why so many of my black brothers in Vietnam bought the farm.

Every time someone yelled GET DOWN!!! They all jumped up and started doing the boogaloo!

 :silly:
Title: Re: (TxDOT) found over 200 dead crows on Highway 281 this past week, and there was concern that they
Post by: catfish1957 on August 07, 2020, 01:29:21 PM
I know that this intended as a humourous piece, but crows typically are among the most intelligent of the avian population.  Seeing that many along a stretch of highway does seem a tad odd.  Generally crows when working on roadkill carrion generally avoid getting hit.

I can't remember ever hitting a crow.  Now Cardinals, Mockingbirds, and the others are different matter.

I remember during the last Avian flu outbreak seeing many crows dying, flying in circles, and acting strangely.  I wouldn't discount this story just yet. 
Title: Re: (TxDOT) found over 200 dead crows on Highway 281 this past week, and there was concern that they
Post by: Wingnut on August 07, 2020, 01:36:16 PM


I remember during the last Avian flu outbreak seeing many crows dying, flying in circles, and acting strangely.  I wouldn't discount this story just yet.

They were stoned out of their beaks from eating fermented berries.
Title: Re: (TxDOT) found over 200 dead crows on Highway 281 this past week, and there was concern that they
Post by: GrouchoTex on August 07, 2020, 04:06:40 PM
Reminds me of why so many of my black brothers in Vietnam bought the farm.

Every time someone yelled GET DOWN!!! They all jumped up and started doing the boogaloo!

My Latino brothers and sisters kept getting fired from NASA.

Every time they said "LAUNCH", they'd go eat.
Title: Re: (TxDOT) found over 200 dead crows on Highway 281 this past week, and there was concern that they
Post by: Bigun on August 07, 2020, 04:39:03 PM
My Latino brothers and sisters kept getting fired from NASA.

Every time they said "LAUNCH", they'd go eat.

 :mauslaff: