Author Topic: Today's Toons 5/6/19  (Read 3900 times)

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Online pookie18

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Today's Toons 5/6/19
« on: May 06, 2019, 09:28:44 am »











(Thanks, Leo in Haworth)









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This Thread Brought To You By The Letters C & W:
 


In Case You Missed It Dept.:

Nancy Pelosi is reportedly working to get House Democrats to drop the idea of impeachment after the Mueller Report cleared Trump of collusion. That's the smart move. The roster of House Democrats includes three former bartenders and even THEY couldn't make Trump a White Russian.

Joe Biden's video made him the twentieth candidate to run for the Democratic Party presidential nomination. The party has really shifted to the left this year. In all my years, I never thought I'd look at a list of Democratic presidential candidates and think that Castro is the moderate.

Kate Smith's statue is being taken down in Philadelphia because she recorded a Broadway hit song in 1931 that was a satire on racism using racist lyrics. Kate sold $600 million in U.S. war bonds on her radio show during World War II to help the Racists defeat the Nazis. It's just a matter of time before Progressives propose an immigration ban on long-dead white people from entering the United States.

Joe Biden's entry in the race likely finalized the list of presidential candidates. Party differences are clear. The Republicans offer two cars in every garage and a chicken in every pot, while Democrats promise two candidates for every voter and, screw the chicken, let's smoke some pot.

New Hampshire Democrats were polled for their presidential favorites. It shows Bernie Sanders in the lead with thirty percent, Joe Biden second with eighteen percent, Pete Buttigieg third with seventeen percent, all the way down to Beto O'Rourke with one percent, tied with skim milk.

-- Argus Hamilton

Ten reasons why I vote Democrat:

#10. I vote Democrat because I love the fact that I can now marry whatever I want. I've decided to marry my German Shepherd.

#9. I vote Democrat because I believe oil companies' profits of 4% on a gallon of gas are obscene, but the government taxing the same gallon at 15% isn't.

#8. I vote Democrat because I believe the government will do a better job of spending the money I earn than I would.

#7. I vote Democrat because Freedom of Speech is fine as long as nobody is offended by it.

#6. I vote Democrat because I'm way too irresponsible to own a gun, and I know that my local police are all I need to protect me from murderers and thieves. I am also thankful that we have a 911 service that gets police to your home in order to identify your body after a home invasion.

#5. I vote Democrat because I'm not concerned about millions of babies being aborted so long as we keep all death row inmates alive and comfy.

#4. I vote Democrat because I think illegal aliens have a right to free
health care, education, and Social Security benefits, and we should take away Social Security from those who paid into it.


#3. I vote Democrat because I believe that businesses should not be
allowed to make profits for themselves. They need to break even and give the rest away to the government for redistribution as the Democrat Party sees fit.


#2. I vote Democrat because I believe liberal judges need to rewrite the Constitution every few days to suit fringe kooks who would never get their agendas past the voters.

And, the #1 reason I vote Democrat is because I think it's better to pay $billions$ for oil to people who hate us, but not drill our own because it might upset some endangered beetle, gopher, or fish here in America. We don't care about the beetles, gophers, or fish in those other countries.


(Thank you, Cyber Ninja)

Offline Smokin Joe

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Re: Today's Toons 5/6/19
« Reply #1 on: May 06, 2019, 10:44:57 am »
Thanks, pookie!
How God must weep at humans' folly! Stand fast! God knows what he is doing!
Seventeen Techniques for Truth Suppression

Of all tyrannies, a tyranny sincerely exercised for the good of its victims may be the most oppressive. It would be better to live under robber barons than under omnipotent moral busybodies. The robber baron's cruelty may sometimes sleep, his cupidity may at some point be satiated; but those who torment us for our own good will torment us without end for they do so with the approval of their own conscience.

C S Lewis

Offline verga

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Re: Today's Toons 5/6/19
« Reply #2 on: May 06, 2019, 11:19:18 am »
Thank you Pookie
In a time of universal deceit - telling the truth is a revolutionary act.
�More than any other time in history, mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and utter hopelessness. The other, to total extinction. Let us pray we have the wisdom to choose correctly.�-Woody Allen
If God invented marathons to keep people from doing anything more stupid, the triathlon must have taken him completely by surprise.

Offline Polly Ticks

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Re: Today's Toons 5/6/19
« Reply #3 on: May 06, 2019, 11:44:32 am »
Thanks, Pookie!
Love is the most important thing in the world, but baseball is pretty good, too. -Yogi Berra

Offline 240B

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You cannot "COEXIST" with people who want to kill you.
If they kill their own with no conscience, there is nothing to stop them from killing you.
Rational fear and anger at vicious murderous Islamic terrorists is the same as irrational antisemitism, according to the Leftists.

Online pookie18

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Re: Today's Toons 5/6/19
« Reply #5 on: May 06, 2019, 01:54:50 pm »
Thanks, pookie!

You're welcome, Smokin Joe!

Online pookie18

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Re: Today's Toons 5/6/19
« Reply #6 on: May 06, 2019, 01:55:09 pm »
Thank you Pookie

My pleasure, Verga!

Online pookie18

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Re: Today's Toons 5/6/19
« Reply #7 on: May 06, 2019, 01:55:35 pm »
Thanks, Pookie!

You're welcome, as always, Polly Ticks!


Offline ricebug

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Re: Today's Toons 5/6/19
« Reply #9 on: May 06, 2019, 07:40:47 pm »
G'day, Pookie!!

Online pookie18

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Re: Today's Toons 5/6/19
« Reply #10 on: May 06, 2019, 07:43:50 pm »