Author Topic: The Adventures of Florida Man: A Running Thread  (Read 10709 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Online mountaineer

  • Hero Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 44,409
Re: The Adventures of Florida Man: A Running Thread
« Reply #125 on: June 11, 2019, 12:40:33 PM »
Bush's beans 'n' blow.
"Because men have lost the objective basis of certainty of knowledge of the thing in which they are working, more and more I fear we are going to find them manipulating science according to their own sociological or political desires rather than standing upon concrete objectivity." Francis A. Schaeffer

Online jmyrlefuller

  • J. Myrle Fuller
  • Hero Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 16,576
    • Fullervision
Re: The Adventures of Florida Man: A Running Thread
« Reply #126 on: June 12, 2019, 01:05:14 PM »
Florida man arrested after hiding meth in container of 'hot, fresh potato wedges,' police say
A Florida man’s order was up after deputies discovered a bag of meth inside a styrofoam container of “hot, fresh potato wedges,” authorities said.

James Simpson, 48, was arrested Saturday afternoon after police conducted a traffic stop, the Hillsborough County Sheriff's Office said.


https://www.foxnews.com/us/florida-man-meth-hot-fresh-potato-wedges
The enemy of my enemy is not necessarily my friend. It may just be that I have two enemies.

Online jmyrlefuller

  • J. Myrle Fuller
  • Hero Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 16,576
    • Fullervision
Re: The Adventures of Florida Man: A Running Thread
« Reply #127 on: June 12, 2019, 01:06:51 PM »
Florida man, naked, performs ‘strange dance’ at McDonald’s before ‘trying to have relations with a railing’
"I was dispatched to McDonald's in reference to a white male wearing white shorts taking their clothes off and doing a strange dance," said Morgan's arrest report, written by Officer D. Grossklass.

"The caller stated that they believed the male to be possibly on drugs. The male was doing this near the front door of the McDonald's.

"While I was on my way to McDonald's it [was] also stated that the male pulled his pants down, but put them back on. Lastly, the caller stated that it looked as though the male was trying to have relations with a railing."


https://www.newsweek.com/florida-man-naked-strange-dance-mcdonalds-sex-railing-1443522
The enemy of my enemy is not necessarily my friend. It may just be that I have two enemies.

Offline Sanguine

  • TBR Moderator
  • *****
  • Posts: 34,598
Re: The Adventures of Florida Man: A Running Thread
« Reply #128 on: June 12, 2019, 01:16:25 PM »
No way drugs were involved:

"I ask, sir, what is the militia? It is the whole people, except for a few public officials." – George Mason, Virginia Ratifying Convention, June 1788

“Do right and risk the consequences.”

– Sam Houston

Offline thackney

  • Hero Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 9,322
Re: The Adventures of Florida Man: A Running Thread
« Reply #129 on: June 12, 2019, 01:35:36 PM »
https://www.newsweek.com/florida-man-naked-strange-dance-mcdonalds-sex-railing-1443522

A couple of buried jems in that article:

Quote
...Earlier in June, Florida man Peter Wagman, 37, from Pinellas Park, was charged with domestic battery for pouring tomato sauce all over his sleeping girlfriend following an argument about infidelity.

Wagman, who pleaded not guilty, was allegedly heard at around 4:45 a.m. yelling "that's what you get, b****h" as he covered her in the red condiment. The couple reportedly had a history of police callouts for domestic incidents.

Last Tuesday, Escambia County deputies arrested Keriah Renea Giomi, 25, of Cantonment after she allegedly tried to stab a man in the stomach with a hunting knife while she was naked and yelling "Jehovah" at him. Giomi faces felony charges of aggravated battery.
Life is fragile, handle with prayer

Online mountaineer

  • Hero Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 44,409
Re: The Adventures of Florida Man: A Running Thread
« Reply #130 on: June 12, 2019, 04:56:54 PM »
The railing was heard sadly singing, "Will you still love me tomorrow? "
"Because men have lost the objective basis of certainty of knowledge of the thing in which they are working, more and more I fear we are going to find them manipulating science according to their own sociological or political desires rather than standing upon concrete objectivity." Francis A. Schaeffer

Online jmyrlefuller

  • J. Myrle Fuller
  • Hero Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 16,576
    • Fullervision
Re: The Adventures of Florida Man: A Running Thread
« Reply #131 on: June 14, 2019, 07:49:13 PM »
Florida man brought an assistant to his crime spree, deputies say. She was 4 years old.
Around 8 a.m. Thursday, deputies responded to the 100 block of Charles Street to a witness reporting a suspicious person carrying around large bags on a neighbor’s property along the river, according to a sheriff’s office Facebook post.

The witness mentioned the suspect walking with a little girl who was carrying a bag, too.


https://www.miamiherald.com/news/state/florida/article231560903.html
The enemy of my enemy is not necessarily my friend. It may just be that I have two enemies.

Offline verga

  • Hero Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 3,792
Re: The Adventures of Florida Man: A Running Thread
« Reply #132 on: June 14, 2019, 09:43:27 PM »
Florida man brought an assistant to his crime spree, deputies say. She was 4 years old.
Around 8 a.m. Thursday, deputies responded to the 100 block of Charles Street to a witness reporting a suspicious person carrying around large bags on a neighbor’s property along the river, according to a sheriff’s office Facebook post.

The witness mentioned the suspect walking with a little girl who was carrying a bag, too.


https://www.miamiherald.com/news/state/florida/article231560903.html
Sounds like the Damon Runyon story Butch Minds the Baby.
In a time of universal deceit - telling the truth is a revolutionary act.
�More than any other time in history, mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and utter hopelessness. The other, to total extinction. Let us pray we have the wisdom to choose correctly.�-Woody Allen
If God invented marathons to keep people from doing anything more stupid, the triathlon must have taken him completely by surprise.

Online Smokin Joe

  • Hero Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 25,009
Re: The Adventures of Florida Man: A Running Thread
« Reply #133 on: June 15, 2019, 02:41:16 AM »
Nude Florida man accused of flinging his urine at cops
“There’s a man out here butt naked!” exclaimed a woman speaking to a 911 operator after witnessing a man wearing nothing but his birthday suit attempt to enter a convenience store several days ago.

When the 911 technician asked if the man was sporting any weapons, the caller stated, “No, he is like nude. Nude. He’s very nude!”


https://www.nydailynews.com/news/crime/ny-nude-florida-man-charged-with-tossing-urine-at-cops-20190609-zykwswy7izckvdyr54bywde3cq-story.html
No shirt, no shoes, no service...
How God must weep at humans' folly! Stand fast! God knows what he is doing!
Seventeen Techniques for Truth Suppression


There are no "Socialists", no "Progressives", only Communists, with every negative image that totalitarianism might muster, demanding fealty and conformity to their views, with a legacy of 150,000,000 dead and counting.

Offline sneakypete

  • Hero Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 15,747
Re: The Adventures of Florida Man: A Running Thread
« Reply #134 on: June 15, 2019, 10:26:06 AM »
No shirt, no shoes, no service...

@Smokin Joe

"flung his urine at the cops....."

Sounds to me like this goober WANTED to be beaten for free.

Ok,who here would blame the cops for beating the snot out of him while arresting him?

Don't get me wrong. I am NOT  a fan of police brutality,and almost always question violent arrests,but there are limits to everything.
« Last Edit: June 15, 2019, 10:27:12 AM by sneakypete »
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
This post has been approved by Mod 3 or you wouldn't be seeing it.

Online jmyrlefuller

  • J. Myrle Fuller
  • Hero Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 16,576
    • Fullervision
Re: The Adventures of Florida Man: A Running Thread
« Reply #135 on: June 15, 2019, 01:18:24 PM »
Florida man asked cops for help starting motorcycle he’d stolen
Raymond Millwater is just 30 years old but he's been jailed nearly two dozen times.

His latest trip to the slammer came after someone reported seeing a possibly intoxicated man pushing a motorcycle down a road in Clearwater.

Police responded and said they found Millwater standing unsteady near the bike. He told them he borrowed it from a man named Chad, but he couldn’t get it to turn on.

Not deterred, Millwater asked officers if he could borrow a screwdriver to get the motor running.


https://www.wkyt.com/content/news/Florida-man-asked-cops-for-help-starting-motorcycle-hed-stolen-police-say-511329372.html
The enemy of my enemy is not necessarily my friend. It may just be that I have two enemies.

Offline Right_in_Virginia

  • TBR Contributor
  • *****
  • Posts: 40,008
Re: The Adventures of Florida Man: A Running Thread
« Reply #136 on: June 15, 2019, 01:19:39 PM »
"January 20th 2017 will be remembered as the day the people became the rulers of this nation again."  --  President Donald J. Trump

Online jmyrlefuller

  • J. Myrle Fuller
  • Hero Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 16,576
    • Fullervision
Re: The Adventures of Florida Man: A Running Thread
« Reply #137 on: June 15, 2019, 01:40:42 PM »
Florida man confesses to string of pool float thefts, says he uses them for impure intents
According to officials, in the past seven months, the city of Palm Bay has been plagued with burglaries in which the suspect cuts the screen and enters a victim's back pool area, stealing only pool floats.

There have been 13 reports made at this time. The victims stated that they had been robbed several times by Monnin but only reported the burglary after the second or third time it happened. Officials say there were apporximatly 75 floats inside (Monnin's domicile), including ones that the victims described.

Monnin told authorities that he "sexually gratifies himself" with the pool floats instead of raping women.


https://www.clickorlando.com/news/florida-man-steals-pool-floats-for-sex-instead-of-raping-women-police-say'

(The mugshot on this one is pretty impressive, too.)
The enemy of my enemy is not necessarily my friend. It may just be that I have two enemies.

Offline sneakypete

  • Hero Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 15,747
Re: The Adventures of Florida Man: A Running Thread
« Reply #138 on: June 15, 2019, 02:12:28 PM »
Florida man asked cops for help starting motorcycle he’d stolen
Raymond Millwater is just 30 years old but he's been jailed nearly two dozen times.

 

@jmyrlefuller

My prediction is he is going to see many more jails and prisons from the inside before it all ends.

Depending on whose motorcycle it was he stole,that is. There ARE some people that take that sort of thing seriously,and they tend to have good friends who are already in prison,and who will be waiting to greet him with open arms. Bad things will then happen to him.
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
This post has been approved by Mod 3 or you wouldn't be seeing it.

Online Smokin Joe

  • Hero Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 25,009
Re: The Adventures of Florida Man: A Running Thread
« Reply #139 on: June 15, 2019, 04:31:26 PM »
Florida man confesses to string of pool float thefts, says he uses them for impure intents
According to officials, in the past seven months, the city of Palm Bay has been plagued with burglaries in which the suspect cuts the screen and enters a victim's back pool area, stealing only pool floats.

There have been 13 reports made at this time. The victims stated that they had been robbed several times by Monnin but only reported the burglary after the second or third time it happened. Officials say there were apporximatly 75 floats inside (Monnin's domicile), including ones that the victims described.

Monnin told authorities that he "sexually gratifies himself" with the pool floats instead of raping women.


https://www.clickorlando.com/news/florida-man-steals-pool-floats-for-sex-instead-of-raping-women-police-say'

(The mugshot on this one is pretty impressive, too.)
Tell him just keep it. There is not enough chlorine in the pool....
How God must weep at humans' folly! Stand fast! God knows what he is doing!
Seventeen Techniques for Truth Suppression


There are no "Socialists", no "Progressives", only Communists, with every negative image that totalitarianism might muster, demanding fealty and conformity to their views, with a legacy of 150,000,000 dead and counting.

Online jmyrlefuller

  • J. Myrle Fuller
  • Hero Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 16,576
    • Fullervision
Re: The Adventures of Florida Man: A Running Thread
« Reply #140 on: June 21, 2019, 07:00:10 AM »
Florida man attempts to break into Buddhist temple, flees half-naked when confronted by monks
A Hernando man is behind bars after Kenneth City Police officials say he attempted to break into a Buddha Temple.

The Kenneth City Police Department says Jack Williams, 26, was seen at around 5:15 a.m. on June 19 on the roof of the Kenneth City Buddha Temple striking a glass bedroom window.

Williams was charged with Loitering and Prowling.


https://www.wfla.com/news/pinellas-county/florida-man-flees-buddha-temple-half-naked/2089013839
The enemy of my enemy is not necessarily my friend. It may just be that I have two enemies.

Online jmyrlefuller

  • J. Myrle Fuller
  • Hero Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 16,576
    • Fullervision
Re: The Adventures of Florida Man: A Running Thread
« Reply #141 on: June 21, 2019, 09:55:01 PM »
Florida man throws feces at judge, says ‘It’s protein. It’s good for you.’ and eats some to demonstrate
... and the best part of the story is: he was acquitted.

https://www.wfla.com/news/pinellas-county/florida-man-flees-buddha-temple-half-naked/2089013839
The enemy of my enemy is not necessarily my friend. It may just be that I have two enemies.

Offline Lando Lincoln

  • Hero Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 12,530
Re: The Adventures of Florida Man: A Running Thread
« Reply #142 on: June 21, 2019, 10:26:40 PM »
Florida woman who hid stolen Rolexes in vagina beats charge. What happens to the watches?

June 19, 2019
Prosecutors were forced to drop criminal charges against a South Florida woman accused of stealing five Rolex watches — four of which were found inside her vagina during a jail strip search.

Delajurea Brookens, 29, beat the grand-theft charge earlier this month when the victim, an Orlando businessman named Ramon Diaz, stopped cooperating with prosecutors.

Prosecutors were forced to drop criminal charges against a South Florida woman accused of stealing five Rolex watches — four of which were found inside her vagina during a jail strip search.

Delajurea Brookens, 29, beat the grand-theft charge earlier this month when the victim, an Orlando businessman named Ramon Diaz, stopped cooperating with prosecutors.

https://www.miamiherald.com/news/local/crime/article231737783.html

For the progressive, there is very little to love about the United States. Washington, Jefferson, Madison? A bunch of rotten slaveholders, hypocrites, and cowards even when their hearts were in the right places. The Declaration of Independence? A manifesto for the propertied classes. The Constitution? An artifact of sexism and white supremacy. The sacrifices in the great wars of the 20th century? Feeding the poor and the disenfranchised into the meat-grinder of imperialism. The gifts of Carnegie, Rockefeller, Vanderbilt, Morgan, Astor? Blood money from self-aggrandizing robber barons. Nat Rev

Offline verga

  • Hero Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 3,792
Re: The Adventures of Florida Man: A Running Thread
« Reply #143 on: June 22, 2019, 05:25:50 AM »
Florida woman who hid stolen Rolexes in vagina beats charge. What happens to the watches?

Just the kind of girl you want to take home to mom.
In a time of universal deceit - telling the truth is a revolutionary act.
�More than any other time in history, mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and utter hopelessness. The other, to total extinction. Let us pray we have the wisdom to choose correctly.�-Woody Allen
If God invented marathons to keep people from doing anything more stupid, the triathlon must have taken him completely by surprise.

Offline sneakypete

  • Hero Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 15,747
Re: The Adventures of Florida Man: A Running Thread
« Reply #144 on: June 22, 2019, 12:21:57 PM »


Florida woman who hid stolen Rolexes in vagina beats charge. What happens to the watches?

June 19, 2019
Prosecutors were forced to drop criminal charges against a South Florida woman accused of stealing five Rolex watches — four of which were found inside her vagina during a jail strip search.

Delajurea Brookens, 29, beat the grand-theft charge earlier this month when the victim, an Orlando businessman named Ramon Diaz, stopped cooperating with prosecutors.

Prosecutors were forced to drop criminal charges against a South Florida woman accused of stealing five Rolex watches — four of which were found inside her vagina during a jail strip search.

Delajurea Brookens, 29, beat the grand-theft charge earlier this month when the victim, an Orlando businessman named Ramon Diaz, stopped cooperating with prosecutors.

https://www.miamiherald.com/news/local/crime/article231737783.html

Sounds like she stole them from a guy that had stolen them first.

Which means she is probably going to be found in a ditch with a bullet in her head soon,and the watches will go unclaimed. Or at least unclaimed until the cops can figure out a way to get them through a "closed" confiscated seized property sale."
+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
This post has been approved by Mod 3 or you wouldn't be seeing it.

Online mountaineer

  • Hero Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 44,409
Re: The Adventures of Florida Man: A Running Thread
« Reply #145 on: June 28, 2019, 07:47:37 PM »
Florida Man has his own Twitter account: https://twitter.com/FloridaMan__

Today's offering:
Quote
Florida Man   @FloridaMan__

Florida Man tries to Barbecue Child Molesters http://gestyy.com/w2oJV6
5:19 PM - 28 Jun 2019
The story is from May, here's a better link.
"Because men have lost the objective basis of certainty of knowledge of the thing in which they are working, more and more I fear we are going to find them manipulating science according to their own sociological or political desires rather than standing upon concrete objectivity." Francis A. Schaeffer

Online Cyber Liberty

  • Coffee! Donuts! Kittens!
  • Administrator
  • ******
  • Posts: 43,200
  • We got 'im now!®
Re: The Adventures of Florida Man: A Running Thread
« Reply #146 on: June 28, 2019, 07:54:31 PM »
Florida Man has his own Twitter account: https://twitter.com/FloridaMan__

Today's offering: The story is from May, here's a better link.

You may have hit the Mother-lode with that Twitter link....
Don't call it the "Federal Government," that's an insult to the Founders.  It's a "National Government."
I will NOT comply.
                          Castillo del Cyber! ~~~~~>                          :dontfeed:

Online Cyber Liberty

  • Coffee! Donuts! Kittens!
  • Administrator
  • ******
  • Posts: 43,200
  • We got 'im now!®
Re: The Adventures of Florida Man: A Running Thread
« Reply #147 on: June 28, 2019, 07:57:46 PM »
Don't call it the "Federal Government," that's an insult to the Founders.  It's a "National Government."
I will NOT comply.
                          Castillo del Cyber! ~~~~~>                          :dontfeed:

Offline Mod1

  • Hero Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 1,548
Re: The Adventures of Florida Man: A Running Thread
« Reply #148 on: June 28, 2019, 08:45:44 PM »
I'm going to sticky this, since it's a "running" thread.
It should be easier to find now.

Online InHeavenThereIsNoBeer

  • TBR Advisory Committee
  • ***
  • Posts: 3,765
Re: The Adventures of Florida Man: A Running Thread
« Reply #149 on: June 28, 2019, 08:46:38 PM »


Florida Man does not wear sleeves.

Seriously, you people never watched Cops?
My avatar shows the national debt in stacks of $100 bills.  If you look very closely under the crane you can see the Statue of Liberty.


Share me

Digg  Facebook  SlashDot  Delicious  Technorati  Twitter  Google  Yahoo
Smf