Author Topic: Today's Toons 2/4/19  (Read 6247 times)

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Offline pookie18

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Today's Toons 2/4/19
« on: February 04, 2019, 11:07:33 am »

 
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This Thread Brought To You By The Letters C & W:

 
In Case You Missed It Dept.:
 
President Trump tossed an olive branch to the House, offering to open the government for three weeks in return for down payment wall funding while they negotiate the final deal, but he got no response. Trump is finding it very difficult to negotiate with Pelosi. It's like talking to a wall. 
 
President Trump agreed to delay his State of the Union speech until after the shutdown ends. This speech is a tradition we inherited from England in the King's address to Parliament. And from France, we've inherited the tradition of half the country always wanting to behead the King.
 
The U.S. refused to recognize Venezuelan dictator Nicholas Maduro as head of the government after his ouster by the parliament as the country plunged into economic chaos. Socialism always leaves the people on the streets asking one question. How many calories are there in a horse?
 
ABC News retracted its story that the drum-banging Native American protestor Nathan Philips is a Vietnam vet as was claimed after his face-off with school kids on the Mall. It's a huge issue. Fellow Native American Elizabeth Warren leaped to his defense, insisting he is 1/1024th Vietnam vet.
 
Congresswoman Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez spoke to a climate forum in Washington where she declared that the world will end in twelve years. She's a socialist who wants to slap a seventy percent income tax on people. All I can say is, if Venezuela can make it work, why can't we? 
 
Politico reports furloughed federal workers have been offered free mental health counseling by psychologists in Washington. The workers do need help. Most of them are Democrats, and with nothing else to do, it looks like all eight hundred thousand of them have decided to run for president.
 
California Senator Kamala Harris was the leader of the first poll of Democratic candidates on Monday. So let me be the first of many to say it. Kamala Harris sexually assaulted me at a house party many years ago, I don't remember any of the details but you have to believe me or you're sexist.
 
West Virginia Senator Joe Manchin gave an interview Sunday in which he disclosed his plans to run for president of the United States next year, and he'll have no trouble standing out. Joe Manchin is easily distinguishable from the other forty-six Democratic candidates. He's the Democrat.
 
Aero Mexico announced Tuesday it will be offering airline ticket price discounts to customers in proportion to the Mexican DNA they can show to the ticket agent. Along the same line, tribal casinos announced they'll be offering restaurant discounts to customers pro-rated on the percentage of their Indian blood they can prove. For instance, Elizabeth Warren would pay an extra ten percent.
 
House Democrats tried to rein in new Members who sleep in their offices and make news with social media. They're making their mark fast. Socialist Congresswoman Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez has been in Congress for only six weeks and already her portrait is on Venezuelan government bonds.
 
Venezuela teetered on the edge of chaos as Nicholas Maduro refused to step down as president as the U.S., Britain and Canada recognized his rival. The country is certainly no ad for a socialist economy. If you toilet-paper someone's house in Venezuela, it's a wedding present.
 
-- Argus Hamilton
 

(Thank you, Reagan_Fanatic)

Online Polly Ticks

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Re: Today's Toons 2/4/19
« Reply #1 on: February 04, 2019, 12:13:22 pm »
Thanks, Pookie!
Love is the most important thing in the world, but baseball is pretty good, too. -Yogi Berra

Offline pookie18

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Re: Today's Toons 2/4/19
« Reply #2 on: February 04, 2019, 12:16:55 pm »
Thanks, Pookie!

You're welcome, Polly Ticks!

Offline verga

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Re: Today's Toons 2/4/19
« Reply #3 on: February 04, 2019, 03:31:57 pm »
Nice Job Pookie
In a time of universal deceit - telling the truth is a revolutionary act.
�More than any other time in history, mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and utter hopelessness. The other, to total extinction. Let us pray we have the wisdom to choose correctly.�-Woody Allen
If God invented marathons to keep people from doing anything more stupid, the triathlon must have taken him completely by surprise.

Offline pookie18

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Re: Today's Toons 2/4/19
« Reply #4 on: February 04, 2019, 03:34:55 pm »

Online 240B

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Re: Today's Toons 2/4/19
« Reply #5 on: February 04, 2019, 04:05:02 pm »


In military terms, 29 armed troops would constitute a platoon of soldiers.
Mueller sent a platoon of armed agents to question a 66 year old "suspect" and his 67 year old wife.
Obviously, Mueller expected them to resist with automatic weapons.
You know, because that's what they are famous for doing.
These are deadly, dangerous people. Make sure everyone is locked and loaded and has body armor on.
Then Mueller decided to put CNN in danger by putting them in the middle of the crossfire.
You cannot "COEXIST" with people who want to kill you.
If they kill their own with no conscience, there is nothing to stop them from killing you.
Rational fear and anger at vicious murderous Islamic terrorists is the same as irrational antisemitism, according to the Leftists.

Offline pookie18

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Re: Today's Toons 2/4/19
« Reply #6 on: February 04, 2019, 04:08:12 pm »


In military terms, 29 armed troops would constitute a platoon of soldiers.
Mueller sent a platoon of armed agents to question a 66 year old "suspect" and his 67 year old wife.
Obviously, Mueller expected them to resist with automatic weapons.
You know, because that's what they are famous for doing.
These are deadly, dangerous people. Make sure everyone is locked and loaded and has body armor on.
Then Mueller decided to put CNN in danger by putting them in the middle of the crossfire.

Move on! Nothing to see there!

Offline uglybiker

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Re: Today's Toons 2/4/19
« Reply #7 on: February 04, 2019, 05:13:41 pm »

Well gee whiz! Now ol' Koogly-eyes Cortez says we've got 12 years.
Things are looking up!
nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-nuh-BATMAN!!!

Online Smokin Joe

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Re: Today's Toons 2/4/19
« Reply #8 on: February 04, 2019, 05:14:09 pm »
Thanks, pookie!
How God must weep at humans' folly! Stand fast! God knows what he is doing!
Seventeen Techniques for Truth Suppression

Of all tyrannies, a tyranny sincerely exercised for the good of its victims may be the most oppressive. It would be better to live under robber barons than under omnipotent moral busybodies. The robber baron's cruelty may sometimes sleep, his cupidity may at some point be satiated; but those who torment us for our own good will torment us without end for they do so with the approval of their own conscience.

C S Lewis

Offline pookie18

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Re: Today's Toons 2/4/19
« Reply #9 on: February 04, 2019, 05:20:25 pm »
Thanks, pookie!

My pleasure, Smokin Joe!

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Re: Today's Toons 2/4/19
« Reply #10 on: February 04, 2019, 06:23:27 pm »


OK troops. We're going in to arrest Roger Stone, an extremely dangerous man. I'm going to need every armed agent we have. I've also called in the National Guard for backup support. Prepare for a real fight, a fire fight! Bring the grenades, bazookas, and any other heavy ordinance you can muster.

Roger Stone yells, "Come and get me coppers!! Say hello to my little friend!!"


You cannot "COEXIST" with people who want to kill you.
If they kill their own with no conscience, there is nothing to stop them from killing you.
Rational fear and anger at vicious murderous Islamic terrorists is the same as irrational antisemitism, according to the Leftists.

Offline pookie18

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Re: Today's Toons 2/4/19
« Reply #11 on: February 04, 2019, 06:35:53 pm »

OK troops. We're going in to arrest Roger Stone, an extremely dangerous man. I'm going to need every armed agent we have. I've also called in the National Guard for backup support. Prepare for a real fight, a fire fight! Bring the grenades, bazookas, and any other heavy ordinance you can muster.

Roger Stone yells, "Come and get me coppers!! Say hello to my little friend!!"


Make that my little friends...


Offline ricebug

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Re: Today's Toons 2/4/19
« Reply #12 on: February 04, 2019, 07:05:39 pm »
G'day, Pookie!!!

Offline pookie18

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Re: Today's Toons 2/4/19
« Reply #13 on: February 04, 2019, 07:06:46 pm »