Author Topic: Ridiculous News of the Day  (Read 528505 times)

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Wingnut

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Re: Ridiculous News of the Day
« Reply #825 on: May 23, 2017, 12:09:13 am »
They had to check it out if it was on the lot or the right of whey.

Look out for Andrew Dice Clay...

Offline Smokin Joe

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Re: Ridiculous News of the Day
« Reply #826 on: May 23, 2017, 12:25:48 am »
Look out for Andrew Dice Clay...
I actually thought his stuff was funny before he got reeducated. Maybe my sense of humor changed...nah. I noticed that happened to Linda Ellerbee, too, back when. When they let her back on the air she had one of those butch buzzcuts and only was let out to do kids shows.
How God must weep at humans' folly! Stand fast! God knows what he is doing!
Seventeen Techniques for Truth Suppression

Of all tyrannies, a tyranny sincerely exercised for the good of its victims may be the most oppressive. It would be better to live under robber barons than under omnipotent moral busybodies. The robber baron's cruelty may sometimes sleep, his cupidity may at some point be satiated; but those who torment us for our own good will torment us without end for they do so with the approval of their own conscience.

C S Lewis

Offline bigheadfred

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Re: Ridiculous News of the Day
« Reply #827 on: May 23, 2017, 12:50:24 am »
I actually thought his stuff was funny before he got reeducated. Maybe my sense of humor changed...nah. I noticed that happened to Linda Ellerbee, too, back when. When they let her back on the air she had one of those butch buzzcuts and only was let out to do kids shows.

You notice it was a patron of the bank that was interested. You sure can't get that kind of interest from a bank.

And yeah, Linda went Stepford.
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Offline Cripplecreek

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Re: Ridiculous News of the Day
« Reply #828 on: May 24, 2017, 04:20:51 am »
Bay City laundromat's fresh concrete vandalized with 'giant penis' etching

BAY CITY, MI -- Police are looking for a pair of young scofflaws who defaced the parking lot of a Bay City laundromat by etching a phallus into some freshly laid concrete.

Malarie Cisnero, location manager at Totally Clean Coin Laundry at 1005 N. Henry St., said the business had poured cement in its lot Monday morning, May 22.

"I came to work this morning and one of the maintenance guys called me outside to view what was written in the brand new concrete," Cisnero said on Tuesday.

Inscribed in the lot was "Savage Squad" and a "giant penis," Cisnero said.


http://www.mlive.com/news/bay-city/index.ssf/2017/05/bay_city_laundromats_fresh_con.html#incart_river_home_pop

« Last Edit: May 24, 2017, 04:21:22 am by Cripplecreek »

Offline Suppressed

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Re: Ridiculous News of the Day
« Reply #829 on: May 24, 2017, 05:47:49 am »
I noticed that happened to Linda Ellerbee, too, back when. When they let her back on the air she had one of those butch buzzcuts and only was let out to do kids shows.

You mean after she had breasts cancer treatment?
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Offline Smokin Joe

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Re: Ridiculous News of the Day
« Reply #830 on: May 24, 2017, 06:47:14 am »
You mean after she had breasts cancer treatment?
I don't know why the show went off the air. Letterman was no replacement, that's for sure, at least not imho. I didn't know she had had breast cancer, but when she came back, she did not seem to be the same person and was significantly more politically correct.
How God must weep at humans' folly! Stand fast! God knows what he is doing!
Seventeen Techniques for Truth Suppression

Of all tyrannies, a tyranny sincerely exercised for the good of its victims may be the most oppressive. It would be better to live under robber barons than under omnipotent moral busybodies. The robber baron's cruelty may sometimes sleep, his cupidity may at some point be satiated; but those who torment us for our own good will torment us without end for they do so with the approval of their own conscience.

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Offline Cripplecreek

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Re: Ridiculous News of the Day
« Reply #831 on: May 24, 2017, 12:03:25 pm »
Human leg in fishing boot washes up on beach

JUNEAU, Alaska — A human leg with a fishing boot still on was found in a debris pile that collected in the waters near Alaska’s capital city.

Juneau Police Lt. David Campbell says the leg — from the knee down — was found by state game workers clearing out a debris pile Monday from Gastineau Channel near Sandy Beach.

It had deteriorated to the point they couldn’t determine race or gender. It’s been sent to the state medical examiner’s office in Anchorage for possible identification.

Police will search for other remains. He wasn’t aware of any missing people in Juneau this year.

Campbell says bodies show up in Juneau every few years. The last was in 2016 when a hiker found human remains near Mendenhall Glacier. He says those were of a person reported missing in 2010.


http://nypost.com/2017/05/24/human-leg-in-fishing-boot-washes-up-on-beach/

Offline EC

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Re: Ridiculous News of the Day
« Reply #832 on: May 24, 2017, 04:42:33 pm »
Courthouse X-ray scanner finds live monkey in purse

BAY CITY, MI -- It's not unusual for security personnel at the Bay County Court Facility to see visitors attempt to bring odd or prohibited items past them.

Recently, though, something particularly exotic -- even tropical -- nearly made it into the courthouse: a squirrel monkey stowed away in a patron's purse.

Former Bay City resident Linda Stevenson on Thursday, May 18, visited the facility at 1230 Washington Ave. and put her purse on the X-ray machine at the building's security station.

"I pushed the button for it to go through when it started making noises," said Bay County Sheriff's Court Security Deputy Pat McIver. "I was like, 'What was that?' She goes, 'Oh, that's my monkey.'"

The X-ray captured an image of the diminutive simian's skeleton within Stevenson's purse.

"I said, 'I need to see your monkey,'"

More: http://www.mlive.com/news/bay-city/index.ssf/2017/05/monkey_trial_courthouse_x-ray.html

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Offline Smokin Joe

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Re: Ridiculous News of the Day
« Reply #833 on: May 24, 2017, 04:47:34 pm »
"I need to see your monkey,'"

 :silly: :silly: :silly:

(Please, don't spank it!)
How God must weep at humans' folly! Stand fast! God knows what he is doing!
Seventeen Techniques for Truth Suppression

Of all tyrannies, a tyranny sincerely exercised for the good of its victims may be the most oppressive. It would be better to live under robber barons than under omnipotent moral busybodies. The robber baron's cruelty may sometimes sleep, his cupidity may at some point be satiated; but those who torment us for our own good will torment us without end for they do so with the approval of their own conscience.

C S Lewis

Offline Cripplecreek

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Re: Ridiculous News of the Day
« Reply #834 on: May 24, 2017, 05:28:57 pm »
"I need to see your monkey,'"

 :silly: :silly: :silly:

(Please, don't spank it!)

Bay City seems to be a fun place lately.

Giant Penises and Tiny Monkeys.

Offline EC

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Re: Ridiculous News of the Day
« Reply #835 on: May 25, 2017, 04:24:01 pm »
Nude dancers push back against class-action settlement

A growing number of exotic dancers want to block a national class-action settlement alleging workplace exploitation by Michigan-based Déjà Vu clubs, saying it will pay many dancers only a few hundred dollars each.

Kalamazoo dancer Merry Clark said in a letter to the court that the proposed $6.5-million settlement is "nowhere near enough" for her and other dancers she says have been outrageously exploited by Déjà Vu Services and related companies for "sweaty gross work."

Also, dancers' attorneys from as far away as Massachusetts and Tennessee have filed objections to the settlement ahead of a June 6 hearing in federal court in Detroit, saying the proposal is not fair, reasonable, or adequate.

Attorneys for the lead plaintiffs and for Déjà Vu say the settlement is fair and contains many non-monetary benefits for the dancers. They say objectors still represent a tiny handful of the more than 28,000 dancers and former dancers who are class members.

U.S. District Judge Stephen Murphy can't modify the proposed settlement, but can only accept it or reject it as is, attorneys say.

The case centers on whether the dancers are employees or independent contractors — a classification that affects issues such as whether the clubs must pay them a minimum hourly wage or can instead charge them for doing business inside the clubs.

Though it's billed as a $6.5-million settlement, the proposal would provide only $920,000 in cash payments to settle claims from more than 28,000 dancers who worked at 64 different clubs in 18 states, including 11 in Michigan, Boston attorney Harold Lichten argued in a May 12 court filing.

More: http://www.freep.com/story/news/local/michigan/2017/05/25/opposition-growing-class-action-settlement/340369001/
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Offline EC

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Re: Ridiculous News of the Day
« Reply #836 on: May 25, 2017, 04:27:13 pm »
From the sublime to the ridiculous

51 male and female South Koreans are arrested for smuggling TWO TONNES of gold nuggets worth £77million in their rectums and private parts

Dozens of South Koreans were arrested for smuggling gold in their private parts over a two year period, local media reports.

The smugglers are said to have sneaked in more than two tonnes of the precious metal worth around £77million since March 2015.

Male smugglers hid as many as six gold bars weighing 200g in their rectums while women stashed it in their vaginas.

More: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-4537116/South-Koreans-arrested-smuggled-77million-gold-rectum.html

It's a shitty job.
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Offline Smokin Joe

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Re: Ridiculous News of the Day
« Reply #837 on: May 25, 2017, 05:45:33 pm »
Nude dancers push back against class-action settlement


Though it's billed as a $6.5-million settlement, the proposal would provide only $920,000 in cash payments to settle claims from more than 28,000 dancers who worked at 64 different clubs in 18 states, including 11 in Michigan, Boston attorney Harold Lichten argued in a May 12 court filing.

More: http://www.freep.com/story/news/local/michigan/2017/05/25/opposition-growing-class-action-settlement/340369001/
Wow. Thirty two bucks and change each? That's not even an hour's tips on a slow night. But the whores of the court are going to get paid...(the lawyers).
How God must weep at humans' folly! Stand fast! God knows what he is doing!
Seventeen Techniques for Truth Suppression

Of all tyrannies, a tyranny sincerely exercised for the good of its victims may be the most oppressive. It would be better to live under robber barons than under omnipotent moral busybodies. The robber baron's cruelty may sometimes sleep, his cupidity may at some point be satiated; but those who torment us for our own good will torment us without end for they do so with the approval of their own conscience.

C S Lewis

Offline bigheadfred

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Re: Ridiculous News of the Day
« Reply #838 on: May 25, 2017, 11:40:48 pm »
Wow. Thirty two bucks and change each? That's not even an hour's tips on a slow night. But the whores of the court are going to get paid...(the lawyers).
@EC

Why don't these girls form a union?

I'd look for the union label.
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Re: Ridiculous News of the Day
« Reply #839 on: May 25, 2017, 11:50:30 pm »
@bigheadfred

I took a look - because you made me curious. There is a strippers union (it's part of the SEIU) but most strippers can't join, since they are treated as independant contractors by the venues.

http://www.bayswan.org/EDAunionLL.html
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Offline Smokin Joe

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Re: Ridiculous News of the Day
« Reply #840 on: May 26, 2017, 12:05:42 am »
@bigheadfred

I took a look - because you made me curious. There is a strippers union (it's part of the SEIU) but most strippers can't join, since they are treated as independant contractors by the venues.

http://www.bayswan.org/EDAunionLL.html
Well, there you go. Set up a Independent Stripper's Association and charge nominal dues (put it behind a paywall). Let complaints be lodged against venues for working conditions, nonpayment, etc and let the ladies sort out where they will or won't work. They could even discuss rates and other topics in a forum. At least they would have a reference they built and share to allow them to better choose where to work, and possibly even to exchange information to get work in better venues.
« Last Edit: May 26, 2017, 12:06:36 am by Smokin Joe »
How God must weep at humans' folly! Stand fast! God knows what he is doing!
Seventeen Techniques for Truth Suppression

Of all tyrannies, a tyranny sincerely exercised for the good of its victims may be the most oppressive. It would be better to live under robber barons than under omnipotent moral busybodies. The robber baron's cruelty may sometimes sleep, his cupidity may at some point be satiated; but those who torment us for our own good will torment us without end for they do so with the approval of their own conscience.

C S Lewis

Offline EC

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Re: Ridiculous News of the Day
« Reply #841 on: May 28, 2017, 03:31:28 am »
Bear assists police in catching three violent robbers in Tochigi Prefecture

Bears say only we can prevent forest fires, but they’ll help out when preventing robberies.

At around 2:50 pm on 23 May, three men ages 18 to 22 broke into a home in Utsunomiya, Tochigi. They then began assaulting the two 75-year-old women who resided there causing injuries. When violent invasion was all finished they ran off, taking with them a safe full of approximately 6.6 million yen (US$59,000) in jewelry.

Afterward, the trio were found by law enforcement in a car in Nikko City, about 50 kilometers (31 miles) from the scene of the crime. Tochigi Police gave pursuit in a helicopter as the fugitives tried to escape along the highway. In order to shake the chopper, they then ditched the car inside a tunnel on the highway and ran into the mountain forest.

And that’s when things went really bad for them.

As they ran through the woods the three men came face-to-face with a bear. And although they were tough stuff when it came to beating up elderly women, these thugs felt outmatched by the beast and quickly turned back the way they came.

More: http://en.rocketnews24.com/2017/05/28/bear-assists-police-in-catching-three-violent-robbers-in-tochigi-prefecture/

200 part anime series coming next week.
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Offline Cyber Liberty

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Re: Ridiculous News of the Day
« Reply #842 on: May 28, 2017, 04:29:30 am »
Well, there you go. Set up a Independent Stripper's Association and charge nominal dues (put it behind a paywall). Let complaints be lodged against venues for working conditions, nonpayment, etc and let the ladies sort out where they will or won't work. They could even discuss rates and other topics in a forum. At least they would have a reference they built and share to allow them to better choose where to work, and possibly even to exchange information to get work in better venues.

Could they call it The Gilded Guild?
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Offline Smokin Joe

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Re: Ridiculous News of the Day
« Reply #843 on: May 28, 2017, 05:22:47 am »
Could they call it The Gilded Guild?
They could call it anything they want...it would be theirs, after all.
How God must weep at humans' folly! Stand fast! God knows what he is doing!
Seventeen Techniques for Truth Suppression

Of all tyrannies, a tyranny sincerely exercised for the good of its victims may be the most oppressive. It would be better to live under robber barons than under omnipotent moral busybodies. The robber baron's cruelty may sometimes sleep, his cupidity may at some point be satiated; but those who torment us for our own good will torment us without end for they do so with the approval of their own conscience.

C S Lewis

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Re: Ridiculous News of the Day
« Reply #844 on: May 31, 2017, 05:25:33 pm »

Police: Thieves using blowtorch to steal from Everett ATM accidentally set cash on fire
POSTED 11:26 AM, MAY 30, 2017, BY Q13 NEWS STAFF, UPDATED AT 09:52AM, MAY 31, 2017

EVERETT, Wash. -- Police in Everett say would-be ATM thieves thwarted their own burglary attempt by setting the cash on fire.

[...]

Aaron Snell with the Everett Police Department said the suspects used a blowtorch to try and access the ATM's cash box. In the process of doing so, they accidentally set the money on fire.

John Dickson, Chief Operations Officers of Coastal Community Bank, said the suspects were not able to get away with any money. [...]

More: http://q13fox.com/2017/05/30/police-thieves-using-blowtorch-to-steal-from-everett-atm-accidentally-set-cash-on-fire/


Photo credit: Everett Police Department
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Offline Sanguine

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Re: Ridiculous News of the Day
« Reply #845 on: May 31, 2017, 05:29:18 pm »
Police: Thieves using blowtorch to steal from Everett ATM accidentally set cash on fire
POSTED 11:26 AM, MAY 30, 2017, BY Q13 NEWS STAFF, UPDATED AT 09:52AM, MAY 31, 2017

EVERETT, Wash. -- Police in Everett say would-be ATM thieves thwarted their own burglary attempt by setting the cash on fire.

[...]

Aaron Snell with the Everett Police Department said the suspects used a blowtorch to try and access the ATM's cash box. In the process of doing so, they accidentally set the money on fire.

John Dickson, Chief Operations Officers of Coastal Community Bank, said the suspects were not able to get away with any money. [...]

More: http://q13fox.com/2017/05/30/police-thieves-using-blowtorch-to-steal-from-everett-atm-accidentally-set-cash-on-fire/


Photo credit: Everett Police Department

That is such an unexpected reaction - paper money and blow torch - that I can see how they didn't foresee it.

Offline corbe

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Re: Ridiculous News of the Day
« Reply #846 on: June 03, 2017, 04:21:32 pm »

Police arrested a mail carrier accused of feeding a meatball full of nails to a dog

by Circa News


June 2, 2017



Police arrested an Alabama mail carrier Thursday after they say she fed a meatball full of nails to a dog along her route.

Susan Burhans was charged with aggravated animal cruelty by Madison County Sheriff deputies after a joint investigation with the Postal Service. 

Sheriff’s Capt. Mike Salomonsky said the investigation began two weeks ago when a complaint was filed and now at least one other resident has also filed a complaint.

<..snip..>

http://circa.com/circa-now/happening/mail-carrier-was-arrested-for-feeding-a-meatball-full-of-nails-to-a-dog

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Offline Cripplecreek

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Re: Ridiculous News of the Day
« Reply #847 on: June 03, 2017, 04:32:28 pm »
Police arrested a mail carrier accused of feeding a meatball full of nails to a dog



And now I appreciate inconvenience of going to the post office that much more.

Offline verga

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Re: Ridiculous News of the Day
« Reply #848 on: June 04, 2017, 02:26:47 am »
Police arrested a mail carrier accused of feeding a meatball full of nails to a dog

by Circa News


June 2, 2017



Police arrested an Alabama mail carrier Thursday after they say she fed a meatball full of nails to a dog along her route.

Susan Burhans was charged with aggravated animal cruelty by Madison County Sheriff deputies after a joint investigation with the Postal Service. 

Sheriff’s Capt. Mike Salomonsky said the investigation began two weeks ago when a complaint was filed and now at least one other resident has also filed a complaint.

<..snip..>

http://circa.com/circa-now/happening/mail-carrier-was-arrested-for-feeding-a-meatball-full-of-nails-to-a-dog
Well I think I have a suggestion for her next meal.
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Offline Smokin Joe

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Re: Ridiculous News of the Day
« Reply #849 on: June 04, 2017, 03:42:20 am »
Well I think I have a suggestion for her next meal.
People like her just confirm my dog's reaction to Mail Carriers.
How God must weep at humans' folly! Stand fast! God knows what he is doing!
Seventeen Techniques for Truth Suppression

Of all tyrannies, a tyranny sincerely exercised for the good of its victims may be the most oppressive. It would be better to live under robber barons than under omnipotent moral busybodies. The robber baron's cruelty may sometimes sleep, his cupidity may at some point be satiated; but those who torment us for our own good will torment us without end for they do so with the approval of their own conscience.

C S Lewis